Earlier today I paused for a few moments while I was showering and I notice that little-by-little, I have been cleaning and making some changes in my home that makes me feel good, such as: changing my shower curtains and lighting my candles more often than usual. I know I’m getting ready for a change in my life. I just wish I knew exactly what that is at this moment; but I felt a shift last December and I am ready for the change like a caterpillar becoming a butterfly!
My cure was given.
My cure was consign as a renewing of my way of reasoning possessing space.
In this essay, I was tasked with a bid to write a “lipography” about something that I am afraid of, omitting all descending letters of the alphabet, such as: g, j, p, q and y.
You know what scares me the most? DEATH!!! Oh, not that I will die sometime, I’ll be dead, what would I care about death when I’m onboard the death train? No, I’m not at all a-scared of death for me. What scares me the most is losing a loved one; that’s the hardest element to deal with in this world, to me at least.
all other circumstance in this world, while we are still alive; time heals. Time heals all wounds, the loss of a loved one; I wish was just a wound, but time cannot heal this absolute loss. With this one, time allows us to relive our lives without them. It allows us the room to learn how to live with the loss, but it will never make them visible in our world, it just makes it a little easier to not think about the loss, but to think about their lives which remains stand fast in our memories.
It wasn’t until last summer – I wish I can write the name of the month, but It ends with a letter I cannot use; It wasn’t until then, when I received an answer to better receives and handle this unavoidable transition, we call death! The voice within the universe said to me: “Do not hold death so close to you, it is the natural occurrence of all creatures of this world. Mom and Dad are to board the death train in advance! What’s worse? Mom and Dad to be a witness at their child’s wake, or a child being a witness at Mom and Dad’s wake? It would be so much easier to use one word which starts with a letter I cannot use, instead of Mom and Dad. No Mom and Dad should ever live to see that death has taken their child, but its an ordination that the child must witness such a loss.
It was on that date sometime back in the summer, when I received the sanction to conceded to the inevitable loss that I must and should be a witness to. It was then that the scariness of death to Mom and Dad diminished for me.