If it can’t be bought, now what?

In the article, “How to buy happiness: what good is money if it can’t buy happiness” by Sonja Lyubomirsky they ask college freshmen about their most important life goal and more than half of the percentage checked off being wealthy. In the article she asks what does being wealthy do for our well-being? What does it do for us? Lyubomirsky spoke to a plastic surgeon who in the eyes of a average person would seem to have it all. He was wealthy, owned several luxurious items, a wife and had a stable job. He admitted to loving it at first but after a while it all got boring and dull. He had lost his motivation and his high paying job wasn’t all he had once thought it was cracked up to be. A lot believe that a persons paycheck has everything to do with their well being because of what it can provide for you but through this article they shine a different light on the topic asking you if you have the wealth, how do you buy happiness.

The article states that money does in fact supply our well being but to an extent. Our well being doesn’t revolve around money yet society believes that without it we are nothing. It helps but it is not everything. Money provides more of desired items than anything else. Possessions are only desired for a short period of time before it’s just another object lying around because after it being around for a long period of time it becomes uneventful. If an individual compares a material item with a past experience, the experience would be more important. The article states that past events can grow more meaning over time rather than becoming dull or repetitive like an object. When given an example about how two people can grow a bond, it makes you think more thoroughly about how relationships are made. Two people are more likely to build a relationship or friendship based on a common experience rather than wearing the same shirt. Another example they gave was how individuals like to compete and feel as if they are better or not beneath anyone. Possessions are more likely to be compared than memories.

The article also enlightens it’s audience with introducing a different way to trigger happiness. A lot of people believe that buy blowing huge amounts of money on luxurious things will make you happy when in fact spending money on just satisfying your basic needs is proven to cause happiness. Also spending money on people who are less fortunately and in more need than you can cause happiness. Little things such as not working as much and spending your time doing more things you love or with people you love makes you more content. Happiness doesn’t lie in success and money but how we spend our time.

This piece by Lyubomirsky reminded me of “How to buy happiness” by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton. In both articles they share insight on why they believe happiness isn’t all about money. As little as spending five dollars can make you happy. If people were to spend more time trying to enjoy themselves with people who make them feel happy they’d understand why money isn’t everything they believe it is. Money is essential in life but it isn’t everything. Happiness shouldn’t revolve around a dollar.

Money = Happiness!

The article “How To Buy Happiness” by Sonja Lyubomirsky talks about how money can buy happiness. The author speaks of research done that has shown how a person’s happiness could be based on how she/he chooses to spend their money. Furthermore, she wrote that evidence has shown that experiences make people happier, and she gave three reasons to support her belief. First, experiences make people happier because unlike material things, experiences don’t change and cannot be replaced. Second, experiences are more likely to be shared with others. Third, experiences make people happier because things could be made as a competition as in people tend to compare their things to other’ possessions. Lyubomirsky also states that the only things that are bought that could make make a person happier are based on three main things: 1. The possession of required skill, knowledge, qualification, or capacity, 2. Being connected to others, and 3. The state of having independence or control over someone’s life. She also adds that another way to buy happiness is by spending money on others instead of just oneself, because by giving money to others, a person could learn to appreciate what he/she owns, by giving to those who have less. Her final statement about buying happiness talks about how using our money to give us more time off of work, because people who are wealthy tend to work more and spend less time enjoying their lives. Basically, Lyubomirsky believes that the key to happiness is not about how wealthy we are but about how we use the money we have.

I personally agree with this article, because to me money could definitely buy happiness. Having money could make a person do whatever they ever wanted to do. For instance, traveling is something that makes me happy; discovering new cultures and helping those in needs is something that fulfills my life, however without money I would never be able to do this. Also, even though this might not be true for many people, I believe that in the modern world we live in, money is basically the top priority to all people who want to be happy. Of course, there are those who are wealthy and miserable, however there are those who also are wealthy but live their lives with much happiness because of the money they got. Material things won’t always make a person happy because they are temporary but if a person knows how to spend their money on things that actually matter he/she could bring happiness to themselves. Sonja Lyubomirsky said that the key to happiness isn’t about how rich a person is but about how the person spends his/her money in her article, which is true. There are those people who become happier by giving to or helping others in need, and others who spend their money on unnecessary things that might or might not make them happier. I actually think that it depends on the person.

Buying your happiness and happiness for others!

In Sonja Lyubomirsky article “How to Buy Happiness” she states various ways that your happiness can be bought from satisfying others happiness to sharing and giving to others. Not only would that benefit you but benefit in the well-being of others as well. She teaches us that money doesn’t always satisfy your needs you can have all the money in the world but it’s how you use your money that makes you really happy. She states, “Growing evidence from Cornell University and University of Colorado at Boulder reveals, for example, that it is experiences-not things-that make us happy”. How you share your experiences with others makes you more social than others. With different experiences you don’t compare those to others because you have been doing something different. You are not following what others are doing or have because that just doesn’t really make you happy or unique. With other related factors the more money you might have the more you can share with others and try and make a difference. To sustain well-being you share with others because in doing that you become a happier person and use your money in a good way. As Lyubomirsky states, “Having money means that we have the ability to contribute substantively to our loved ones and communities, and even change the world”. To buy your happiness sharing your wealth to impact the lives of others affects your well-being. Many experiments are tested to see how individuals think about money and how to spend it. A study done in the University of British Colombia surveyed a group of employees before and after they had received a financial windfall. And its conclusion came to be that those whose bonus was spent on charities or buying something for others were the happiest because of that. How you give to others is rewarding when you see how happy you might make that person. Overall to buy your happiness you share experiences and money with others whom might not only be family.

Whenever you do something good for others it makes you a little happy. I know that if I help someone with something and they recognize I did something good to get noticed by them makes me happy. I don’t yet work enough to know how money can change me in a way if I will be the type to share my wealth and experiences with others or keep most for myself. But treating friends if they can’t get something or spending on family I think is always a good thing and will make me happy. Although, I feel that yes giving to others will make them happy and me because I have done something good besides spend on material things but when I feel like a person could do better or could have tried I don’t feel the urge to give away. When I see poor people on the streets I feel sad for them but I rarely give money because I think how bad could it have been for you to change for the better of you and not be out on the streets or did you just become so lazy and decide to drop everything in your life. Those are my perspectives on buying your happiness or others.

How to buy happiness

In “ What good is money if it cant buy happiness” ?  By Sonja Lyubomirsky argues that can money actually buy happiness? She discusses how no matter how much money you have it cannot bring happiness to you. People who were the most wealthiest weren’t actually happy because, although they may had have everything they wanted it wasn’t something that would last that made them happy, they were more sad and miserable. Lyubomirsky suggested that instead we should spend our money on being adventurous such as vacations, trips, concerts, involving in more positive activities, doing things for others that would make us feel more positive about ourselves. She stated that “the key to buying happiness is not how financially successful we are, but what we do with it” (3),

However I agree that money doesn’t bring happiness all the time maybe for the moment, but when it’s gone, a person is back to their regular self again. I say this because as Lyubomirsky stated when she spoke to an Ivy League educated plastic surgeon, he was someone who had it all, but even though he had it all he said “I had difficulty feeling motivated, and I have trouble getting out of bed this morning” (1) which he explain that although he doesn’t feel motivated he also discusses that he was completely miserable. Therefore a person who can have everything isn’t the happiest person because when you have a certain amount of money you get used to it and it doesn’t mean much to you anymore.

Lyubomirsky compared the comparison between money and happiness. Once a person gets use to positive change in their life such as getting high expenses, cars, clothes, as Lyubomirsky stated “we quickly become inured to changes in our lives and my colleagues and I have found that we get used to the positive changes” (1) that although her and her colleagues get used to the positive changes, they weren’t using it in the way she believed that they should. Therefore people who are rich and wealthy instead of spending money on materialistic things, they don’t necessarily matter it’s the experience that count and how you use it.

An additional thing to buy happiness is spending it on others, as Lyubomirsky believed. She believed that having money were able to have the ability to help one another such as our loved ones, society, charities, and to change the world. When we are able to give to others makes he/she feel more accomplished and positive because they are doing something for another person beside themselves, such as helping an elderly person cross the street, or helping them getting on the subway it makes us as society feel good. Therefore the more there are more people involving, engaging with one another could see that money doesn’t always bring happiness it can be there for the moment and then it’s gone.

Lastly the key to buying happiness isn’t how financial stable we are, but how we use it and it isn’t about how rich a person is or how much they have its all about giving back to one another and helping our society.

Happiness for Sale!

In Sunja Lubmirsky’s article “How to Buy Happiness” points out the main factor of happiness. She believes that having possessions and materialistic things is not important if you have not experienced anything in life. She spoke to an Ivy League educated plastic surgeon with booming private practice about how happy he was. although he owned many expensive things that did make him happy. research showed that if you have these things and your basic needs are not met you happiness will not increase. She also studied and came to the conclusion just like Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton who wrote that spending your wealth with others will make your chances of becoming happier greater. Using the money that we have and outing it towards something that will help us grow is another in which she felt would help gain happiness. Buying more time meaning if we spend our money to give us more open and free time will make room for things you weren’t able to do before. At the end of her article she asked the question “What good is money if it cant but happiness?” and her answer was simply stating its not what you have but its what you do with what you have.

whenever somebody says that its not about the money its about life experience I automatically agree. People fail to realize if they buy a fancy car or a big house that does not mean that the sadness or depression that u faced in your old car or your small apartment will go away. if you used the money to do something you enjoy or go somewhere you always wanted to go is what would make you happy. When you do share amongst your peers, loves ones and friends is increases your happiness not only because you shared but because you did something for someone other than yourself. So instead of buying a fancy car or a new gold watch go somewhere excited and share that excitement with someone else and you will be happier than ever.

Can $$$ increase your :)

In a 2013 web article; How To buy Happiness: What Good is Money if it Can’t Buy Happiness, a Ph.D; Sonja Lyubomirsky argues that the way you spend money can affect your happiness. Sonja Lyubomirsky supported her claim by pointing out how money is being spend. It’s include buying materials to buying experiences and spending on others (donations, buying something for a friend). In conclusion to the article, Sonja Lyubomirsky answered her claim by saying, “The key to buying happiness… it’s not how much high our income is, but how we allocate it.” In other words, how we spend out money can make us happy or happier.

Like the previous article we read, “How to Buy Happiness?, by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton, which argument also includes examples on how happy can one get by buying materials, experiences,  or spending on others. These two articles provide there opinion that money can buy us happiness, according to how we use it.

I agree with Sonja Lyubomirsky’s “How to Buy Happiness: What Good Is Money If It Can’t buy Happiness?” specificity the part about the way people spend money is the key to achieve happiness. People always tell me “Money can’t buy happiness,” and I disagree and this article proof that I was right in a way. There are ways to buy happiness. I don’t believe that people see that though, especially in New York. Many New Yorkers make money just to live on it. In other words, they just put it in the bank and spend it when it is needed. Other New Yorkers only spend it in materials. They would get new apartment to getting a car. Which according to this article, Lyubomirsky suggested it would not guaranteed you being happy for a long-run. There are also some New Yorkers like me who spend their money on experience with others. There are nothing better than treating yourself and some friends to karaoke. I am happy and my friends are happy. It a big boost of happiness to me. This also made me think of Christmas. When everyone usually buy things for each other and spend the time together. It’s one of the happiest time of the year. Everyone is spending money on someone else and sharing the experience with them. I feel happy when I play “Secret Santa” with my friends. I feel really happy buying something for someone else plus we doing it all together. I hope to do it again this year. I think, we can all agree that nowadays, Christmas is another word for “buying happiness”.

However after reading two articles about money can actually buy happiness, it made be questioned myself; is there a negative outcome from using money to buy happiness?,  are happiness bought from happiness different from happiness that are “free, if it does, in a scale which one is higher. Stupidly, I also questioned myself, if money actually can buy happiness, can it also buy other emotions, sadness even. I hope not and if it does, I hope it won’t occur to me.

An investment in happiness

In the Article “How to buy happiness” by Sonja Lyubomirsky , the author stresses the point that buying happiness is possible. By this she means what the individual does with their money , the choices they make lead to happiness. She uses various studies to prove her point. One of these include a study done in Cornell university and University of Colorado , that came to the conclusion that buying experiences produce a greater feeling than buying materials. Lyubomirsky feels that spending money on memories is more worth it than buying a possession. She says this is because the feeling of happiness that comes from the possession fades away, and you get used to it, but when you create a memory you can always go back to it, you will always feel that feeling of happiness when you think of it, when you talk about it. She says you buy happiness when you spend money on something you are able to share with somebody. This means paying for a trip for you and someone else, instead of buying something that is only for you . When you do so you are creating a stronger relationship with others, you are experiencing things with someone else, the feeling of happiness accompanies this. Lyubomirsky feels that you are able to buy happiness because of the way you are able to spend money on creating experiences, memories, Moments, which produce happiness. She says you are less likely to compare your memories with others. You may talk about them, and share what happened, but you won’t say your memories are better or less than that of someone else’s. On the contrary if you buy a car (a possession) and you talk about cars with someone else , you might realize that you feel your car is better than there’s or vice versa you may feel your car is better than theirs, this doesn’t produce happiness, it might actually make an individual feel less than. The idea that it is not how much you have but what you do with what you have is a constant theme in her article. Towards the end she speaks of this idea, that you should spend money on things that will lead you to the feelings of competence, relatedness, and autonomy. This is because she believes the feeling of happiness that will be produced will be long term. And finally she says that if you should spend money on something it should be buying time , meaning don’t overwork yourself, and when you are able to pay someone to do things you can save time from doing. So you are able to spend time on more important things that contribute to your happiness.
After reading Sonja Lyubomirsky’s article I reflected on my own life. I thought back to experiences and memories I had , and found myself smiling. Then I looked at my closet and realized I have about 12 to 14 pairs of shoes, but they are nothing special, they don’t really cause any feelings of happiness. They probably did at the time I bought them, but after time has passed they are simply just shoes to me. I share this because it proves what Lyubomirsky said about the temporary feeling possessions create, that temporary happiness. I believe that she is right when she says you can buy happiness, by using your money wisely. I know that when I spend my money on creating something, like when I go out to eat with a friend or going to a mall with them, I feel good about myself, and it’s a sort of investment you make, you use your money to go somewhere or to do something and what comes from that are memories. Memories that you’ll always be able to talk about look back on and remember. You invest your money in order to create this feeling of happiness for you, in the long term. I think when someone says you can buy happiness, most of us say no you can’t. Because we create the relationship that your buying materialistic things, things for yourself and that would make us selfish right (?) But after reading this article I realized you can buy happiness. Your buying happiness all the time, when you treat someone, take them to diner, taking your mom shopping, going to a movie with someone, the feelings we get , the happiness is there, its produced. If we don’t spend our money wisely ,well than buying happiness becomes impossible. Believing that things like cars, purses, shoes etc. will make us happy is a false hope. This is because you’re not able to share an experience with someone; you are doing things for yourself. Although looking at things having them now make you feel joy or content, after a while it gets old, you get bored and the feeling of happiness is no longer there. That is why we must make wise decisions on how and where we spend our money, failing to do so will result in temporary feelings.

Happiness Archive #3: summary/response to Lyubomirsky article

In Psychology Today’s article “How To Buy Happiness” by Sonja Lyubomirsky, she writes about the association of money to happiness. She goes ahead to describe the difference between the experiences and the material things bought with money. She also tells about how spending money on others can result in sustaining ones well being and when spending money, it should be on “need-satisfying goals.

After reading the article I was convinced by the writer’s compelling points of buying happiness. Although money can’t buy happiness it can buy experiences that will leave a longer lasting impression in our memories. Making it possible to revisit at any point and time. Also when buying an experience it may bring us closer to others. A simple movie date with a loved one, can provide happiness that you both can share. Wherein the material things that we may spend allot of money on, such as, cars,jewelry, tech devices and gadgets don’t last forever. After awhile they become invalid and useless ending the temporary happiness that was created when the items were bought.

Possessions are more likely to be compared. giving us a sense of insecurities when someone comes with newest modeled car, or new version gadget. When we compare ourselves to others we are less happy. We might feel insufficient, bringing all types of self doubt; thus, not being happy.

We can also have a great deal of happiness when we spend our money on something to better ourselves, grow; Such as an education. I spend money coming to and from school, on books, on copies, on clothes, etc…. but there is a bigger picture. The fact that the money being spent is to further myself, it adds to my well being. My Bachelors degree will be very self satisfying. It will contribute to my happiness. Giving me the ability to be a better person , by helping others. Whether it be with my career or just being a strong, proud,African American, single mother. I will have something to show and prove to my children. So yes, I’m buying my happiness through experience. that I will someday share with my children, my clients or maybe even someday, THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!

 

Can you buy happiness ?

In the article “How to buy happiness” by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton, they speak about different ways a person can buy happiness. An example that they used was imagining to wake up with $1 million dollars and being able to spend all on yourself but what were you really gaining out of that? Just because you had all that money and the first thing a person would think to do is spend it on themselves doesn’t necessarily mean that they are happy. What they did was do a little experiment and handing out Starbucks gift cards to people and telling them to share it with another person of just giving their gift to another person and realizing how happy that made them instead of just keeping to themselves and not being happy at all. With this research they showed that you can find happiness by giving a gift to someone or sharing something with a person and sharing an experience with someone rather than alone. You can have all the money in the world but if you’re alone what good does that do for you? Wouldn’t sharing and giving something to a person and seeing them how happy you made them make you happy ?

I agree with this article, just because you may have a lot of money doesn’t mean that you are happy. Helping people and knowing that  you made someone smile and sharing the same experience with someone can make both you and that person happy. You can buy happiness by sharing it with others because it won’t make you happy as an individual if you just do things for yourself.

 

Money, Happiness, and “the American Dream”

After reading “How to Buy Happiness: by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norman i came to comprehend their opinion on happiness, money and “the american dream”. The article states “how we use are money may matter as much or more than how much of it we’ve got”. This statement is true, if you think about it, alot of people believe and say money makes you happy or money buys you happiness but in reality it does not. Its more like what we choose to do with the money that’s what makes us happy. The articles says “a growing body of reaserch shows that the mere whiff of money draws out our selfish sides”. This is true in many occasions, many people have betrayed their close friends and family for just a couple of bucks. With just a bit of money coming towards them many people become selfish without noticing. In addition if you notice as soon as one gets paid we want to spoil ourselves with material things. As i read the article i asked my friend what she would do with one million dollars and with no hesitation she replied “move out”. This as addition to evidence from the article shows that when we have money we think about our wants confusing them with what we need, we dont think about what we could do for others as our first priority. My friend like many other people want the “american dream” of buying there own land or house, but we dont care to see that the land or house will only be temprary happiness. The article states “Dozens of studies show that people get more happiness from buying experiences than from buying material things”. The article supports this by saying that these experiences “makes us who we are” and i suppor it by saying that sharing wonderful experiences  that we can later remember is way much better than buying something that can break. As you see the diffrence is alot, material happiness is only temporary while experiences can last a life time. Many people want to live ” the american dream” and buy a house with luxurius things but even the wealthiest man with the ideal house can not be as happy as a regular citezen renting an apartment. The difference is enjoying money or things with others will make you happier than wasting your money on things you would enjoy more yourself.