The passage I choose to reflect on is found in chapter one when Sethe first reunited with Paul D.
“I got a tree on my back and a haint in my house, and nothing in between but the daughter I am holding in my arms. No more running from nothing. I will never run from another thing on earth. I took one journey and I paid the ticket, but let me tell you something, Paul D Garner: It cost too much! Do you hear me? It cost too much. Now sit down and eat with us or leave us be.”
In this passage Sethe’s grief about her troubled life was on display to Paul D and her daughter Denver after Paul D suggested she move from the house at 124. The tree on her back was the pattern of scars from whipping she received while living as a slave at Sweet Home. She was powerless in her home because the baby ghost who haunted her house could at any given time cause supernatural things to occur. She said, “this haint my house,” in this manner to indicate the absurdity of the situation. Between the sorrow of what was happening in her home and caring for her daughter Denver she had nothing else in between to look forward to. Because she had a very bad experience when she ran away to be with her children, she was prepared to stay and face her problems rather than revisit the horrors she had endured when she first ran away. She felt when she ran away the cost was too much, not in terms of money but in terms of the emotional and psychological problems that she encountered that was vividly imprinted in her memory. Repeatedly telling Paul D, “it cost too much,” indicate that her statement has deeper meaning than money. She gave him the ultimatum to sit down and eat or leave because she felt that she was the one who was living in that terrible situation and was capable of knowing when to leave.
