The Right to Speak Up

“I am speechless, but I can’t keep quiet
And I am wordless, but I can’t stay silent”

-Lauren Daigle, “Wordless” on her album How Can It Be

Have you ever been so overcome with emotion that you were completely speechless?

We often put ourselves in others’ shoes, imagining what we would do if we were in their situation; but when it happens to us, somewhere between the realm of the hypothetical and reality, we lose our thoroughly-thought-out, immaculately articulated responses.

There will be times when, frankly, life will shut you up. Something so shocking, painful, or nerve-wracking will leave your lips locked and your tongue tied. Choosing to speak up will not be the easy, automatic thing to do, but you will know that it is the right thing to do.

Two weeks ago, in my blog post The Right to Remain Silent, I talked about how silence can be a constructive form of communication. On the flip side, there are times when keeping quiet hinders more than it helps. It is imperative to know when to break the silence. 

a broken brick wall exposing a partly cloudy sky

Getty Images (Vkyryl)

Speak Up against Injustice

Victims of injustice often have a hard time seeking justice on their own. The stigma, pain, and residual feelings of weakness stifle their attempts, and they remain silent because it seems to be the only reasonable option. This is especially the case for victims of sexual assault, violence, and harassment. Nevertheless, whether you are the victim or you know one personally, speaking up about it might be uncomfortable, but it is the only way to initiate change.

City Tech has taken a stand against crimes of that nature by providing mandatory When Yes Means Yes… Sexual Assault Training for Students and  Title IX Training for Employees. The goal is to make more people aware so that the excuse “I didn’t know” evaporates. Bringing the issue to the light affirms the victims, exposes the perpetrators, warns potential offenders and calls the bystanders to action.

Speak Up about Secret Struggles

If you are anything like me, the worse a problem gets, the less willing you are to tell people about it, especially if it is an internal problem. By internal I mean something going on inside of your mind, a struggle in which you are battling your own thoughts, emotions, or habits.

a man with his arms crossed in a pool of dark ink, refusing to receive help from the many hands reaching out to him

Art by Katherine Choi (NY Times)

To give one example, I am guilty of being too much of a perfectionist at times. If I am running late to school, I would much rather it be due to delays and packed subway cars, rather than my oversleeping or not being able to find my glasses. I end up red-faced and teary-eyed on the train platform, angry at myself for making the same mistake over and over, angry that I did not get to bed early enough so that I could wake up comfortably and early this morning, angry that the reason I stayed up is because it took me hours to complete an assignment that other people could do in just one… Next thing you know I’m angry at myself for being angry and making such a big deal over nothing.

It can be a simple character flaw or a clinically diagnosed disorder, but whatever inner struggles you are facing, I encourage you to speak about it. If you were able to handle things yourself, then you wouldn’t be battling yourself. So what will keeping it to yourself do, except make things worse? Reach out to counselors at school, a trusted friend, a professional, a spiritual leader, family member–any confidant can make all the difference. Sometimes you need to hear a voice other than your own, but first, someone has to hear yours. (Please check out my fellow blogger Samantha’s post on a similar topic, Virtues from Motherhood: Needing Help Will Never Make You Weak.)

Speak Up and Get “Greased”

Have you ever heard the saying, “the squeaky wheel gets the grease”? This means that if you have a need, you should make it known. As a college student, and especially a transfer student, I have often felt lost in a sea of demands. I have had to fill out dozens of applications, and I did not always know if I was doing so correctly.

It can be very nerve-wracking to have to go to an office and ask questions, especially if you don’t even know where to start, or if the clerks appear to have a bad attitude. Even so, there are countless resources at your disposal, both on and off campus, to help you with whatever you might need (if you are a City Tech student, see our academics site and student services site). And all of those intimidating officers and professors, guess what? They are paid to help you. When I was at NYU and facing plenty of financial conflicts, one particularly helpful bursar officer gave me his card after an appointment, and repeatedly encouraged me to come back and ask more questions because that was why he was there in the first place. So please take my advice; as the song says, “For / no one can fill / those of your needs / that you won’t let show” (“Lean On Me” by Bill Withers).

Speak Up and Be Yourself

one red game chip among dozens of blue game chips

istockphoto.com

On a lighter note, it’s not always a matter of being in need. It is important to speak up just because you have the natural born right to do so. We are all entitled to have our own opinions and to express them freely (and respectfully).

We live in a time where the lines between fact and opinion are often blurred. Sometimes opinions are given even more importance than facts. People will think you’re crazier for saying “I think Trump makes a good president” rather than “the moon is not real, it’s man-made.”

What’s more, everyone goes around saying “be yourself,” but the fine print under that statement reads, “as long as ‘yourself’ fits into this mold, or is popular, or is politically correct.” You might feel pressured to keep quiet because you are afraid that people will disagree or look down on you. My response, in short, is so what?

As a reserved Christian, my opinion is almost always in the minority, but “minority” does not mean “negligible” or “does not exist.” If you think a certain way and have taken a firm stance on something, no one has the right to silence you.

I encourage you, reader, to do something different today. You can even start small, and work your way up. Raise your hand in class if you don’t understand what the professor just said, rather than nodding absentmindedly. If you think that the person next to you is wearing an awesome shirt, tell him so. Tell your sister that she really hurt your feelings, because she might have been totally oblivious. I dare you to break the silence, because you are most definitely worth hearing.

a microphone pointed at the reader

Shutterstock image

Anything You Want OR Need … for FREE!!

What is something you want to do or have? Did you know you can get it free, especially when you are motivated and put in the research for it. For example, Have you ever walked into a food court of the mall and was offered cinnabon’s sugar donuts, or asian cuisine on a stick? Not only can you get free food but you can request samples from those mall restaurants. At the end of your “food court smorgasbord” you may have a fulfilling snack. Well, that is similar to just about anything you can think of.

colored letters that spell "FREE"

Here’s How:

  1. Events & Activities: You can get free tickets to movies, preescreenings, fashion shows, fundraisers, community events, and celebrities events on sites like EventBrite. And of course many events have goodie bags of freebies. Try looking in Timeout NYC, searching for free concerts in the parks and beaches, download “local” themed apps on your phone, visit Meetup.com hobbies and networking events. Get on tv by searching casting companies like OnSetProductions.
  2. Knowledge Training / Experience: Ask those you know for advice. You can ask companies to volunteer or go on VolunteerMatch. Of course Youtube helps, but there are also sites that allow you to bartering services. Look in the news papers where most jobs offer free training on the condition that you work with them for a time period. I love the DIYnetwork and places, like HomeDepot, that offer free classes.
  3. Food / Clothes: Besides growing a garden and sewing your own clothes, there are organizations and churches that provide free food and clothing. You can even inquire on 311 (for those in NY) for help or on your governments’ website
  4. Shelter Companies like Habitat for Humanity help you own a home as long as you volunteer some labor, but there are other non profits and private funded organizations that provide shelters, rooms, help with mortgage, rent assistance, and utilities (i.e.: heap. There are even grants for new home owners are being energy efficient.
  5. Money Who doesn’t love free money! Apply for government grants, signup with crowdfunding websites, ask those you know, and/or apply for scholarships.
  6. Childcare – Most schools are free, even some pre kindergarten are with programs like Head Start. Some schools and jobs have daycares, just ask. If not contact you local government assistance providers.
  7. Insurance: Contact non-profits, private organization or your government website.
  8. Entertainment Services: There are companies like Vive Entertainment Enterprises LLC or non profits like BRIC Arts Media. You can also find people by looking up hashtags, posting and messaging on sites like Model Mayhem, craigslist, Instagram, and Facebook.
  9. Business Help: Organizations like SBDC at New York City College of Technology, Small Business Association, NYC Business Solutions, NELP (lawyers), and government websites will help small business and entrepreneurs. Go on sites like idealist.org or businessmentor.org to find volunteers and help. The best thing to do is network.
  10. Freebies & Goodies For cosmetics, accessories, cleaning products, and the random, there are nonprofits or organizations that are the middle man like Freecycle. Some places provide free toiletries, others sites give away based on their sponsors.  Hey you might get free stuff for being a loyal customer, like a sephora. where you can also get free samples of cosmetics when ever you want and bigger samples with purchases. There are even sites like Beautystat, and you tubers who have contest and giveaways for their subscribers.

If your need or want isn’t listed here, some of the same sites may still help you. If not, googling the service you need and adding the word free at the end, by putting up post on social media and inquiring with those you know.

Now that you know how to find free necessities and wants, try it for yourself. Get your freebies and tell me all about it.

DISCLAIMER: I am not being paid to share this data or information. Everything is my opinion and I do not take responsibility for what you may encounter during your search.


QUESTIONS TO THE READERS: How do you get freebies? | Have you tried any of the methods? Did it work? | Has anyone got a free iPad or electronic by participating in offers? | Was this information helpful?