There is a word that Spanish speakers will associate with Mexicans. As soon as they hear this word, they almost automatically know this person must be from Mexico. That word is mande. From a young age we are taught that this is how you respond to your elders, whether it’s your parents, grandparents, teachers, or just anyone that is older than you or with authority, you must respond with mande when they call your name. Mexicans are polite and respectful in their way of talking. The way they respond to others shows this politeness. And the way we treat and speak to our elders is very important.

The word mande translates directly to English as “command me” or “tell me what to do”. Spanish words have a formal and informal style. When we say mande we are using the formal form. This word mande, actually comes from the formal expression “mande usted” which is sometimes used in other Latin American countries. But Mexicans have shortened it, as they do with many words, to just mande. When somebody calls our name or speaks directly to us, then we respond with mande, sort of like when in English people say “whats up?”. If something was said and we didn’t quite hear it or understand it, then we respond with ¿mande? In this sense, this word is used as when someone says “pardon”, “excuse me” or “can you repeat that?”.

Growing up this is how I would respond to my elders, mainly my parents and grandparents. If we ever responded with ¡que! which translates to “what” and is very informal, then we would receive a severe scolding and some very concerned look from others. Only a rude and disobedient child would respond with ¡que!  to their parents. The word queis used only for close friends or family with who you have an informal relationship such as a sibling or spouse. Never ever would a Mexican child, or adult, respond with que to their parents.  My friends who were Hispanic, mainly with Puerto Rican parents, would say this was weird. For them it was weird that I would respond with mande to my parents or any older person. While for me, hearing them respond with que made me cringe and close my eyes, just waiting for the yell or the slap across the face that usually came with responding to your parents in this matter. But their mother or father would just continue the conversation as if nothing wrong happened. For them this was a normal and fine way to respond to an older person.

Hearing my friends respond with mande made me so uncomfortable. It would even upset me seeing that they would respond like this to their parents. I used to see them as disrespectful and uneducated. For Mexicans, an educated, respectful person would respond “properly” to their parents. Mande and speaking formally to our elders had been so ingrained in our heads. That’s when I knew mande was a Mexican expression.

Many Latin American people refuse to say mande. They may even get upset and annoyed that mande is still used today. I’ve heard people say that this expression shouldn’t be used at all. They say that mande is a remnant or legacy of Spanish colonial times when it was expected from lower caste individuals to say this to those of a higher caste such as the “full-blooded” Spaniards. Slaves in colonial Spanish territories had to respond to their master with mande usted. It was also expected of indigenous or mixed indigenous people to respond to those with a higher position in the Spanish caste system with mande usted. People nowadays argue that it was a form of submission and shouldn’t be used in modern times. Some say that it takes from our autonomy by allowing others to “command us” and make decisions for us. It is not known if in reality only those of a lower caste only said mande. This is a very Spanish expression and I’m sure it was probably used in Spain since before colonial times. I like to believe that it was used in the same way Mexicans use it now: when speaking to an older person or someone with higher authority. But whether it is true or not that it was used to respond to Spanish masters, mande has taken a new form in Mexico and now is a sign of respect and honor towards others. For example, this is an expression that is used among strangers regardless of their profession, position or age. It is not strange to hear someone with a prestigious profession such as a doctor or lawyer say ¿mande? to someone with a job considered less privileged such as a janitor.  

The famous Mexican president Benito Juarez used the word respect in many of his phrases; respect for others and respect for their rights.  For Mexicans, respect is very important. That is why mande, is not an expression of submission but rather of respect. And I believe this is what it means for the majority of Mexicans. It doesn’t matter what your background is or your profession. Responding with mande is a sign or respect and politeness.