Life After Undergrad: How I managed to check my anxiety at work

With more knowledge comes more power, right? Well in my case more knowledge and more ability came with a larger office, more employees and more targets to hit. Naturally I was flattered my boss thought highly enough of me to promote me, but deep down I was panicked. Part of me even secretly hoped I wouldn’t have to do it and I could sit quietly in the shadows. When I looked at myself in the mirror though, I realized that I needed to look at myself in a better light. I needed to believe in myself and view myself with confidence and not doubt of what mistakes I may make.

When the season started I was jittery, but I tried to sound as confident and positive as I possibly could when I met my new team of employees. I found that they were a really great group of people who were relieved to get a new leader at the helm; this made easing into a new role easier. I’d heard once in a psychology class that there are two types of leaders; transactional and transitional. Transaction leaders are a hands off type of leader that only handles things that go wrong or need attention, but a transitional leader will lead by example– and that’s the kind of leader I wanted to be.

I started by making a list of exactly what I needed to do that day, down to the most minuscule of tasks because it made the whole day seem like less of a challenge. I checked off the must do stuff first– things that had time deadlines or needed to be done the same time every day. After those tasks I worked on the bigger projects and tasks that took more of my time and effort. Breaking up my tasks made my time seem like less of a long-winded spiral. I found that managing my time made me less anxious because it eased the feeling that I wouldn’t get to everything I needed to do. As I started to develop a routine I started to worry less about the day-to-day and just organize my days in a way that made the most sense– and I haven’t looked back since.

 

Tell me readers, how do you stay organized?

Virtues from Motherhood: Needing Help Will Never Make You Weak

(Please note this is a sensitive post and one that was hard for me to share. However, in the interest of healing and helping others, I felt like I was finally okay enough to post.)

This summer has been a somewhat rough one for me. While it was nice to relax and not worry about commuting and classes it also gave me time to think, maybe too much. I’ve mentioned my anxiety before and I’ve always kept it relatively low key and under wraps because I felt I could control it. This summer though, I felt that control slip away from me. I was constantly on edge; my thoughts ran wild and I was always in constant fear of something bad happening or coming for me. I couldn’t sleep or focus and I was always on alert. I wrestled with getting help, maybe going to speak to the therapist I’d seen as a teenager but I didn’t want to see someone who might diagnose the old me. I ignored the clear need for me to get help for weeks, until my family left for vacation and I was left alone with my own mind.

I was driving across the Manhattan bridge one day after being out with friends and rolled slowly along the span as traffic inched along, admiring the view and the city I love so much, but then I had a truly frightening thought that appeared out of nowhere. “What’s stopping me from getting out and climbing over the rail?” It was the scariest moment I’d had in a long while because the thought just popped into my mind unprovoked. I looked at the narrow beam as traffic continued to roll on, and it hit me, this is bigger than me now and I’d need to get help to defeat the demons I’ve let live inside me too long.

I never wanted to wonder ever again if anyone would miss me or feel like my own breaths were suffocating me. A day or so later, I had a panic attack that made me feel like I was being swallowed into a black hole and I got my shoes on that instant and went to my doctor. I couldn’t let my daughter see me this way, I couldn’t meet my goals or even watch TV peacefully until I got my anxiety under control.

With my doctors help I’m doing that, but I had to ask for help and I’m sorry I waited for it to explode into a flood of emotions and fears for me to do it. Nevertheless, I am on the mend, every day that passes I’m a little less anxious and feel just a little more in control of who I am. People seem to forget that their mental health is just as, if not more, important than your psychical health because your mind does matter in every sense.

Asking for help to me was always a sign that I was weak that I was little and I was letting anxiety win, but anxiety (like other mental health issues) can’t be defeated alone, you need a net of support to catch you when you’re weak. Friends, family and your medical professionals are those people, seek them out. Lastly, be kind to those you know aren’t okay, and even ones you don’t, because even though you can’t fathom what’s going on in their head, it’s dictating their whole life, and your words matter to them.


If you, or someone you know is struggling here are some resources that can help. Never ignore the signs.

Suicide prevention hotline

Half of us

NYC Mental Health

The Social Media Rabbit Hole

I caved last week, and FINALLY became a member of the Tumblr community. Wait, is Tumblr considered so yesterday?
a cartoon blond boy's face

Anyways, while perusing Tumblr, I came across a community called Studyblr. I was fascinated by the aesthetics of each photo that I saw while scrolling: beautiful stationary lined up neatly, planners, stacks of books, an organized desk, laptops, beautifully written study notes, and perfect natural lighting.
Studyblrs are blogs meant to encourage others to develop healthy study habits, promote organizational skills, and even encourage tracking your daily water intake.
Yeah, it definitely caught my attention. Did I just stumble upon the holy grail of organization!?

I found myself asking how was I organizing and balancing my stressed out life and wishing my desk at home was neat like the photos I saw on Tumblr. Why couldn’t there be more natural lighting in my room? Why –?

Wait.

These are the moments in which we need to catch ourselves and break from social media. I was beginning to compare myself to people I’ve never met before. I was assuming that they have it all together. For all I know, these bloggers might not even be as organized as they seem.

cartoon of a young girl that says "it may look like I'm doing well and have my life together. I just want you to know... that is a straight up lie."

There’s a big debate in the community as to whether or not Studyblrs are helpful or harmful to ones mental health. Some stating the unrealistic study habits and pressure that’s attached to it.  After watching a variety of Youtubers and reading blogs on the Studyblr community I was able to develop my own opinion about the whole debate:

1) Studyblr photos are beautiful to me! I’m a huge fan of stationary, contrasting colors, and well organized books.

2) They have some amazing tips! But I’m here to keep it real with you. Their study tips are not for everyone, and that’s okay. Everyone learns differently. Rewriting notes in different colors might not be your thing. I had one professor in college introduce me to Gardner’s Multiple Intelligences, and encouraged me to create art in class while she lectured. She knew I had my own style of learning. Read more about Gardner here.

3) You don’t have to do everything a blogger is doing. Be you. That means embracing your uniqueness and doing what’s best for you. Pick and choose what works.

4) Stop comparing yourself to everyone on social media. Be who you are in this very moment. We’re all on a different path in life. Inspired by something or someone? That’s great, but remember learning any new skill takes time. 

5) Comparing yourself to others creates unhappiness, which can lead to stress, and can manifest itself into physical ailments.

Interested in Studyblr?
-Here’s a link to a free planner
-Tutorial on how to setup a bullet journal

Check out the Studyblr community on Tumblr and Youtube. Leave your thoughts about the Studyblr, your own personal study habits, or share a moment you fell down the social media rabbit hole.

-Sarah

Brain food

Disclaimer: I’ve been evaluated by my physician for any potential food allergies. Please be aware of any food allergies you might have as they can be life-threatning. 

Let’s be honest. Being a student means being on a budget, and when you’re on a budget you tend to buy foods that aren’t exactly keeping you fueled. If we aren’t hydrating and eating the right foods are body begins to experience symptoms such as feeling dizzy, drowsy, headaches, and feeling cranky. I find when I choose to eat unhealthy, I am more prone to feeling irritable, fatigue, and stressed. So what are some foods you can eat that are cheap, won’t burn a hole in your wallet, and keep you energized during that 3-hour lecture?

cartoon of a face and a plate of food

1) Bananas: Grab it and go. Provides a variety of nutrients such as Potassium which helps to regulate your blood pressure. Bananas keep you fuller longer, and are great to relieve crampy muscles.

2) Yogurt: Perfect after a tough workout or a long commute. Yogurt provides B12 which is known to promote healthy brain function. Healthy bacteria found in yogurt helps to keep you, “regular.” Don’t forget the air freshener!

3) Energy Bar: Read the ingredients list carefully. Some bars are better than others, but make sure you’re not allergic to anything listed in the ingredients. These are perfect to keep with you on the go when your stomach suddenly growls in the middle of class or on the train.

4) Overnight Oats: Not a morning person? Prep this the night before so you can just grab and go in the next day. Find a few recipes here. Add your favorite fruits to the mix and you will start your day with a nutrient rich breakfast.

5) Water: HYDRATE! I can’t say this enough. Water helps to flush out toxins, keep you regular, relieve fatigue, and promotes healthy body functions. Signs you’re dehydrated: Thirsty, dry skin, dizziness, dry mouth, ­­­­­

I’m just grazing the surface with these foods. There are countless ways to mix and match your food to not only satisfy those taste buds, but provide you with the energy and nutrients needed to conquer your long days. What are some foods you grab when you’re on the go?

-Sarah

Apps to…relax?

a stock image of a woman in white, busy at workTake a moment to look up from your phone while you’re waiting for the train. What do you notice? Almost every single person is on their phone focused on an app. It could be social media apps, games, or even a music playlist. Technology has helped human kind advance in countless ways, but is it possible to find balance using it? For the next few articles, I will be providing more helpful details to help you discover that thing that could aid in your journey to self-care. I conducted an informal search for the top apps on social media to see the 2016 favorites.

4) Head Space: Sign up for a free 10 day trial to experience a personal mind trainer. Head space offers personal customizations for those on the go. Users have reported reduced feelings of anxiety, learning to stay present, and proper breathing techniques. A monthly subscription costs around the same as a monthly Netflix subscription.

3) Calm- Meditate, Sleep, Relax: Available for Android & IPhone is an easy to use app that, which according to my friends, has greatly reduced their anxiety. Some of them utilizing the app when they have a break to help them remain present and cope with daily stress.

2) White Noise: One of my personal favorites. This app features an impressive sound catalog of 40 sounds. Discover comforting sounds like rain fall, crickets, crackling fires, and more. You’re able to mix your favorite sounds to create the perfect ambience, and even set a timer. Normally I steer clear from using my phone a half-and-hour before bed, but if I’m too restless, I’ll pick my favorite customized mix and fall right to sleep. You can download the free version or pay a one-time fee of 99 cents.

Honorable mentions include: Words with friends, Meditation guide with Deepak Chopra & Oprah, Spotify, and Pandora. And drum roll for our number one…!

1)Power Button: Just turn off your phone. Sometimes technology can make us more stressed! Take a moment to close your eyes, focus on your breathing, and stay present.

Use an app to relax that wasn’t mentioned in the list above? Share your favorites with us!

-Sarah