Practice 1 – I find Lily’s intro to be an interesting one. This writing seems to be directed towards younger college students, so she immediately starts with a fun intro statement, that manages to portray an emotion that new students are likely to be feeling. She continues to talk about some emotions and thoughts that went through her head in college, in a very engaging way. Her writing actually hooks the reader because she talks about very interesting topics. Her mentioning philosophy and how her school thoughts managed their way home gave the writing an interesting turn. It makes you think back to the point in your life where you may have had similar thoughts. I remember in highschool in a propaganda class we were having a surprisingly deep conversation. A convo that was filled with much wisdom and life advice. Those thoughts seeped into my head and I still think about them. Overall I liked this writing because it keeps the reader engaged and talks about relatable topics.
Practice 2 – I like the way you made this writing so quick and concise. I feel like for any type of work, sometimes making something too long drags it out and takes the interest out of it. However making something short is a great way to make sure your reader doesn’t zone out before the reading ends. This reading is telling us of an intense stare off between two species of animal. By personifying them it is easier to give more life to the story and make the reading engaging. I also liked how you finished your story. You smoothly go from personifying your problems to ending your writing with a realistic issue/thought. You manage to do this in one sentence so that’s very impressive.
I will always prefer feedback over praise. I understand that praising someone’s strengths can often make someone realize what they’re doing right; and by doing that they are able to strengthen the skills that are already good. Generally however I feel like most people don’t take much from praise and don’t learn anything from it. Feedback however, especially if it’s from the right person can be a complete game changer. Just reading it once is a whole other perspective from your own for an individual and they can often point out the many flaws in your writing. It can bump your writing up to a higher level.
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