While reading this story I was confused because I didnāt understand what the author was talking about. It almost felt like if the author had started his story in the middle of the situation he was trying to explain. Coates was talking about things as if the reader had already learned about it when in reality we hadnāt. An example of this is when the author says āI had always avoided that bridgeā and ā… She was patting juba on bridge.ā Before these statements Coates had never mentioned what bridge he was talking about or who the female is that was on the bridge. Statements like these made me confused which caused me to reread the passage because I thought I had missed something when I didnāt. A suggestion I have for the author would be to be more clear when writing his story so that readers wouldnāt feel so confused. I became more interested towards the end of the story because I was able to understand what the author was trying to say but I still have some questions like who was the boy that gave the main character the necklace? I also wonder why the main character did not mourn the death of his brother.
About
Professor: Jessica Penner
Email: creative.writing.citytech@gmail.com
Office Hours: Tuesdays and Thursdays, 11:30 AM – 12:30 PM. Iāll be available through Zoom and will send an invitation via email that you should keep all semester. Try to join my meeting at the start of the hour, not at the endāsince I may be talking to other students or have another appointment after the hour is up. If those times donāt work with your schedule, we can schedule a different time. This means youāll have to schedule an appointment in advance. I suggest you have multiple times in mind, since your schedule may not mesh with mine!
Coates did kinda throw us into a story that seemed to already be happening, but did later tell us what happened with the water dancer and her brother. I agree that many parts of the writing were confusing because it seemed like there was a deeper meaning or a hidden message behind them.
I completely agree with the story being hard to follow. I know that when I was reading the author really caught me at the end with the river scene with her and her brother.
I do agree with you regarding the confusion the author was making. Instead of providing text that makes it difficult for new readers to apprehend, the details should be easier to new readers to grab attention.
I agree that in the story, in some places the author did not clearly talk about the female that also confused me a lot while reading the story.