In the open letter “The slaughter our children” to Governor Lee ,the author hooks the audience by going straight to the point and mentioning the massacre that happened with Nashville school children. The author then proceeds to incorporate research by quoting other parents thoughts on the deaths of young children due to the school shooting. She mentions the many questions they asked themselves such as “Would a different school be safer? Should I have quit my job and homeschooled them?” Along with the images that she provided of toys for the children, the writer creates an image with her writing about what it feels like when heard the sirens go by with the thought on her mind “could it be heading to a school?” With just a couple of pages, the author was able to organize her essay by first presenting to the audience which is the Governor( but most importantly the people) the problem with Governor Lee not speaking up about the massacre . She starts off by questioning the Governor for his lack of urgency, and proceeds to story tell by talking about her experience when hearing the sirens go off. She then includes ways that the Governor could help make a change and ends it with her talking about the ways he didn’t make a change when he could’ve.
Good job! This was a very interesting open letter and it is very passionate. Good choice to analyze this as your mentor text.
A few things you could add to your analysis and things to think about for your own open letter:
Get the title correct: ” An Open Letter To Governor Lee on the Slaughter of our Children”!!!
Notice how she begins by pointing out the urgent need for our government leaders to speak out on the horrific tragedy of the murder of school children. And she is pointing out that the community is waiting for his words. This creates a feeling of suspense and expectation. We are waiting to her what our leader will say. Renkle uses a lot of questions in her piece, there is the expectation that the government leader will finally make a change in gun laws. — SO in your open letter, would you use questions as a rhetorical device?
Notice that at the beginning Renkle identifies herself as one who has family members who are school teachers and in this way she connects herself to her topic. You also should identify yourself at the begining of your open letter and show your connection to your issue.
You write: Along with the images that she provided of toys for the children, the writer shows what it feels like when heard the sirens go by with the thought on her mind “could it be heading to a school?” Here — good job on noticing the images that Renkl creates with her language and on the photograph that accompanies her piece. What about adding some analysis: What rhetorical appeal is the author using with this type of imaging? ETHOS PATHOS OR LOGOS?
Who is the primary audience?
Look at her last words: When you finally spoke, it was not to introduce a plan to reduce gun violence and prevent the slaughter of our community’s beloved children. When you finally spoke, it was to say nothing at all.. SO — How does Renkl close her open letter? Think about the expectation Renkl creates at the beginning of her open letter with the questions she uses. How does she give the answer to her questions? How does she close her open letter? Is this effective? Does it work?