Its never easy, never easy as people try to make you feel. They’ll tell you everyone can deal with difficulties so you can, everyone can live life after going through hardship so you can but nobody come to ask ‘were you really ok after happening bad things that you’ve never imagined’. My life was an example of that truth, didn’t imagine of freedom neither of freewill as I’m having right now.
On august 5,2020 I born in Bangladesh in very conservative family, where women are considered to live under veil. I was lucky that my parents were different, they had different thoughts about this and tried their best to get me education from better place but what about society and his other family members?. When I was growing up and turning into a girl from a child, they started to talk , Why I’m going out, whom I’m meeting, why do I need education, my dad will regret in future everything. But the funny fact is I was only 13 yrs old. I still remember we had amusement parks in our city but my dad never took me there because other people didn’t like that so he will took me and my siblings to capital as capital had more modern and openminded society. But what’s the point its the same country and still the cities had different thoughts.
Our capital was Disneyland for us, the girls wear colorful clothes outside, they hangout in restaurants,they would be sitting on bridge corner(not risky at all). Even capital had small stalls for jewelries, snacks and dolls. But in my city, if any girl wear colorful cloths everyone will check her out, would act like she had done some kind of serious crime. And sitting and hanging out outside is out of question. Where girls are very forced to adapt such condition, isn’t easy for them to get higher education even if they get education ,its only the high school and high school over there is till only tenth grade. After that they will be forced to get married with someone who is years older than her. But the boys they get an entire different lifestyle, nobody would even question if they start having cigars on early age.
It wasn’t easy for me to accept such situations but I was told I have to accept that because its all girls destiny. To save me from marrying someone such old person in future, my dad already engaged when I was ten yrs and believe me that actually worsened my entire life. An engaged girl never get questioned for not getting higher education unless her fiancé doesn’t have any issues with that and my dad believed that he won’t have any.However it wasn’t very uncommon matter to get engaged so early in my society even though it was unlawful by gov. Government by all means I meant,our corrupted government. A girl doesn’t knew how to swiim on her dreams but were forced to understand the facts of marriage and up/downs of family by the age of 18 so she can become an ideal wife for her husband and at that time that husband will not allow you to get higher education either on that concern that you’ll start raise your voice against him and you’ll start working outside that will only bring shame for his family and generation. I still can’t figure out how did my dad thought the things will be different in my case.
In 2016, we got our visa for USA, and by June 18 we were here to accept a new different society and accept an entire different opposite type of nation compared to ours. We started to changed, my parents literally started to motivate us to use this situation and live an new life.Me and my siblings went to school, we adapted new lifestyle as new us. The engagement was still on, no matter how we changed or not. My dad was in touch with them always over phone. One day my fiancé messaged me on my social media and I replied, and we started talking.He was nice and good to me,always Will ask about my days and life but after a year , story started to take a turn. He was acting like same as the other mans from my country. He started to judge my every action, He didnt like the way I used to keep my thoughts infront of him. He didnt like my other friends because they were modern, if I try to explain ,he will be like American culture made me shameless and I’m no good for him. One day he literally said ‘we are getting married soon,why do you even need to study’ things started to become very toxic.
I ended things ,I told my dad I won’t live with a person who will not let me live as I am, I don’t want someone to tell me what can I do or not. I can decide for me and the only place where I wanna rely is my parents nobody else. Finally my parents understood me and supported me and stood with me where the entire committee made fun of us and turned us down;. They defamed us like we were nothing but my parents didnt give up, they said everyone doesn’t have courage like us that’s why they are jealous.Thats when I learned life is so hard but its so different then each other. How other girls are dealing with their life , there are 196 countries in this world so how these girls dealing with their society and dying for their freedom.
lastly I wants to conclude my statement with, its not easy to understand somebody else’s pain but we can always make a better place for others to live where they can live without any kind of judgement and will not be discriminated as shame for society because its not easy to overcome a bad past with thousand hardship and continue your life with that guilt that you brought hardship for others. Life hits you hard, you go through up and down in work school everywhere, then worrying about society is just extra.well that’s true,Its easy to move on but its never easy to forget.So, I wants to get higher education and set example for others that you can live to and will make them enough strong that they will help me to Create a better place for our next generation where mans will be more considerate and women will be strong enough to walk on their heels.
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