I still recall the day that phrase was first uttered out of my friend’s mouth that night. We were playing Monopoly and I happened to have landed on jail on the board.  My best friend, Dajour,  landed on jail visiting me and in a sly remark he said “Haha poor!”, an expression that would permanently solidify itself in our world. I had recently asked him where it came from and as he chuckled I was able to unearth the history behind it. As a kid, he wasn’t dealt the best hand, money-wise. With back-to-school money expenses and going into a charter school with uniforms and books, he was often forced to scrounge together what little supplies were left over from the years before. From 1st grade to the end of his middle school he had the same worn bag. The shoes he had, have worn-out bottoms with rocks wedged into the air pockets of the shabby soles. Not to mention he loved to play hard so by the middle of the year his school pants all had worn-out knees. And while his peers had an allowance, he ate the school food because it was a necessity. So- as he puts it- he was rightfully bullied for his status. He was called names such as, but not limited to, trash man, rags boy, no sole, and Slim Jim. But it was one mock that rang in his ears for years to come. A lower grader came up to him one day pushing him and laughing calling him poor. And it was that day he finally broke and had an eruption of anger. Suspended for 2 days, he came back with newfound bravery and confidence, happily owning what he was.

   The phrase is one capable of being used by anyone if the room is read correctly. I wouldn’t recommend using it in front of someone who can easily be affected by such a thing. Context is of utmost importance for the usage.  Exclaiming “haha poor” to a homeless person would be not just rude but also disappointing. But if one uses it, however, to mock someone for a slight inconvenience to lighten the mood then it’s deemed okay. Just like how while playing Monopoly we were able to flip the meaning of it on its head.  “Haha poor” is an all-inclusive phrase that is welcome to be used by anyone willing to joke about the minor inconveniences that life has to throw at us. I think everyone that has been feeling really down at a point and needs a beacon of hope should know this phrase so they can feel strengthened by a simple taunt that’s meant to bring others down. It is merely flipping the sneer on its head from one of endearment to one of hope and comedy.  

There’s another phrase that often circulates within our friend group. And it all began in my middle school years: “Oh wow, that’s crazy.”  In my younger years, I was very eccentric, some would say cringe. Consistently wearing plaid shirts with jeans, I barely cut my hair and my overall personal hygiene struggled. And as a child from a middle-wage West Indian household, because I grew sporadically the solution was to buy shoes and clothing a size or two bigger and cheaper than some name brand clothing my peers wore. I was often bullied for either having Skechers or undersized or oversized shoes. My way of dealing with the mockery instead of attacking the bully was to sarcastically wave off the verbal onslaught and then retort with a strike of my own. Thus “Oh wow, that’s crazy.” became a part of who I am as a person. Over the years, I’ve used it for more basic and mundane replies to simple anecdotes, making it one of my more known phrases. Because of this my friends meme me for the simplicity of my daily vernacular. More recently, however, the definition of it has changed for me.  It becomes a way for me to shrug off menial information that doesn’t have my interest. As used in the group I’m currently in, Dajour tends to mock me and so it began as a thing for us. Its always a blast having a friend that you can connect with that just irritates you yet makes you overwhelmed with such joy at the same time. Nowadays, together we enhance our livelihood by the things we create and make that a lifestyle.

This is one phrase I’d recommend you use if you’re trying to portray yourself either in a sarcastic manner or if you are trying to kindly but comedically turn down a conversation. If you’re approached by some with ill intent trying to bring you down for how you present yourself saying the phrase is enough for you to empower yourself while also showing your assailant you are not backing down. On the other hand, using it on your friend when they’re talking about their favorite show, one you’ve said on multiple occasions you despise, should be enough to shut down that conversation- unless of course, they decide to ignore you and continue to blabber on.  Just like with “Haha poor”, using this quip is a great way to flip its original meaning on its head and give it a new purpose.  I’m welcoming of anyone wanting to use it as long as no malicious intent is behind the verbalization. 

 From oversized Skechers to raggy old book bags, Dajour and I have turned traumatic and hurtful moments from our childhood and turned them into phrases of endearment, love, and pure joy. Hearing each other and especially others utter those words genuinely brings a smile to my face. Knowing that what was once used to hurt my friend and what I once used to turn away from conflict is now being used as terms of friendship and inclusiveness shows me that we accomplished our goal and I can only hope that others can feel as empowered as we feel today.Â