Growing up, I had one childhood best friend. We were friends since the first grade. We were best friends up until our junior year of high school. This one person had been my go-to for everything. I was hers. We got each other ready for our first dates, we helped each other through our family problems, we watched movies and stayed up all night together. I don’t think anything hurts worse than when friends break up. Especially if you don’t know the reason why.

It was junior year, my year started off fine, and then I got diagnosed with severe social anxiety, in turn I also got diagnosed with vomiting cyclic syndrome. This was a disease that would cause me to vomit and throw up for no reason at all. The cause was unknown. I disappeared from school, stopped showing up, stopped caring. But no one came after me. Not even my best friend. Instead she found new friends, a new best friend, a new life and forgot about me. I was extremely upset, no one understood me. But the worst part is we never communicated any of this, so we both drifted away, pretending everything was fine. I felt betrayed and hurt, I don’t think having other best friends is a big deal, I think forgetting about the one you already have is. We still talk here and there, but it isn’t the same, never will be.

The reason I chose this friendship, is because its the one where I learned the most from. This friendship taught me you don’t truly have anybody but yourself. It also taught me that you shouldn’t rely on anybody. I have people who love me and i should appreciate that, rather than be upset with someone who truly did not want me. Friendships come and go, its important to rely on yourself, and make sure you can survive with nobody on your side.