RAB Source Entry 2 – Lisa Liu

Introduction

My research question is: “Does Chinese parenting work?  Are the kids happy and are they successful? Is there a difference in Chinese parents’ eyes?”

This topic interests me because I have a pair of typical Chinese parents whereas the tiger mom is always strict and the cat dad is always timid. When I was a child, my mom liked to encourage me to learn and study hard because that could give me a nice future. At the same time, my dad agreed and also convinced me more tenderly. Even though I perceived that they were doing it for my best, this morality abducted my freedom in some way. Chinese parenting has very much influenced my personality and my life decisions. This typical Chinese parenting caused me to have very rebellious reactions such as not listening and not wanting to do things in my mother’s controlling way. I already know that many children are affected by their Chinese parents in the way of comprehension and personality. This is because Chinese parents always have high standards and want their children to have the best results and sources. Also, I already know that children often are being pushed forcefully to achieve their academic goals. However, these approaches can lead kids to feel overwhelmed and rebellious while kids are in their adolescence and development period. Some points that I plan to explore and find out more about are the outcomes of Chinese parenting and the difference between being successful and happy in Chinese parenting.

Source Entry #2

Part 1: MLA Citation

Kaye, Heather. “Opinion | China Helped Raise My American Kids, and They Turned out Fine.” The New York Times, 18 Jan. 2023, www.nytimes.com/2023/01/18/opinion/china-education-parenting-culture.html. 

Part 2: Summary

In the article, “China Helped Raise My American Kids, and They Turned out Fine” Heather Kaye shares her personal experience about raising her daughters in Shanghai under Chinese government parenting and a difference between Western parenting in the U.S. At first, Kaye explains that government co-parenting begins in the womb in China as she points out that the reasons are citizens are restricted under birth control policies and a history of sex-selective abortions. Nevertheless, she gave birth to two daughters in China. Upon Chinese style education, Kaye shows the advantages are that her daughters have learned a very strong sense of self-management, social order, and respect for each other. Kaye and her husband seem to think that they don’t need to educate much of their daughters since they are arranged to learn almost everything in school. “We sometimes felt as if your children were on loan to us for evenings and weekends, to be delivered back to school each weekday”, Kaye says. She also shows her worry about her daughters being exposed to Communist Party propaganda but their children actually received some very good social influences from it like heavy censorship, kid-friendly internet, and limited game time. In addition, the public security aspect is very reassuring, because there are always police to keep order when the children are on the streets. Later on, Kaye shares that her family moved to Washington, DC. when the pandemic restricted them under strict lockdown in China. Kaye conveys a big difference as she says “We’ve returned to a divided America when many feel government has no place in our lives” (Kaye). This brings a disadvantage. The safety problem that she does not need to worry about in China has to be paid a lot of attention in American schools because their daughters had encountered a live-shooter drill. This made Kaye admire and miss China’s government co-parenting. Kaye ends her article by explaining that “As an American parent in China, I learned to appreciate the strong sense of shared values and of people connected as a nation” (Kaye).

Part 3: Reflection

Kaye presents her perception that Chinese government co-parenting has made some good results for her daughters. This article reflects part of my research question that Chinese parenting does work. I can see that she describes her daughters as self-disciplined, integrated, and respectful. However, my question to Kaye is does she consider her kids to be happy under this kind of government co-parenting? There are not many descriptions of Kaye’s daughters’ feelings under the Chinese education system but mainly about Kaye’s observation of her kids’ results. I would ask Kaye: Would you value your kids’ success to be happiness? Also, as an American parent in China living for 16 years, do you have the same high standards as most Chinese parents who require their children to study hard and hope that they will achieve in a higher academic stage?

Part 4:  Rhetorical Analysis

This article is an opinion editorial piece in which the author tries to convince the audience that Chinese parenting isn’t that bad as she acknowledges the positive outcomes of her daughters under China’s government-parenting. The occasion of the article is to inform the readers that the Chinese parenting style is effective through her personal experience with her daughters raised in China even though it is defined as tough. Heather Kaye has mentioned she is a fashion designer in the beginning of the article. She posted this article in The New York Times. The New York Times has won 132 Pulitzer Prizes, the most of any newspaper, and has long been regarded as a national “newspaper of record”. This shows a rhetorical appeal of ethos. In addition, she is also the founder of the Shanghai Eco Warriors Summit, and a writer on empowering female entrepreneurs, circular fashion, and plastic pollution. In this article, Kaye’s tone is subjective and informative. She shows a rhetorical appeal of pathos by inserting an image in her article and an anecdote about her daughters encountering a shooter drill; these approaches can provoke audience sympathy. Kaye’s intended audience is Western parents which is different from Chinese government co-parenting since she mentions that in America, the government takes no role in people’s lives which leads to potential threats such as gun incidents. This article was published on January 18th, 2023. It is pretty new to get the message from the author that she is conveying a recent topic to discuss.

Part 5: Notable Quotables

“Constantly served up moral, history and culture lessons on pulling together for the sake of the Chinese nation , our girls came home discussing self-discipline, integrity and respect for elders. With school instilling a solid work ethic and a total drive for academic excellence, my husband and I didn’t need to push the girls to complete homework…” (Kaye).

“Raising kids in China was a plus in other ways – such as the heavy censorship, which results in a kid-friendly internet, and national limits on how many hours young people can spend playing online video games” (Kaye).

“We’ve returned to a divided America where many feel government has no place in our lives. For the first time, I’m a parent in America of two daughters navigating their middle and high school years. Resilient, open-minded and independent, they are thriving here, but it’s been an adjustment. They had their first live-shooter drill at school recently, and we’ve adjusted our senses to be on alert in a way we never needed to in Shanghai. In these times, I find myself missing my Chinese co-parent” (Kaye).