Pain 

Fall 2021 at City Tech was unexpectedly the best thing that happened to me that year. I didn’t expect to pass all my classes, with being comfortable with at-home learning while juggling a job. 

  

I have a tough time focusing in public. I overthink things and I have to prepare myself for interactions at times, so I don’t come off as awkward. With online learning, all I needed to do was to be on time and pay attention to the instructor.  

 

I took Math, History, and English. I was anxious at first because I needed to pass those classes in order for my transcript to look good. This was also my first time back, online, at City Tech since the start of the pandemic. I honestly didn’t expect me lasting to the end of December. 

 

My instructors were tremendous at their work. They went over topics at a pace that was just right for me. If I didn’t understand a certain lesson, I was able to meet with them over office hours and go over it more in depth. 

 

Since my classes were spaced out, I was able to do my work immediately after the end of class. Since I was on top of my work, I had more time to make study sheets. These were things that I used to dread doing. These were things that I, at the time, enjoyed doing.  

 

Luck also played a factor. I assumed that my professors were going to end up being as bad as the ones I had in the previous semester, which was in-person, they weren’t the greatest bunch. I had an askew belief that professors were all like this. 

  

The things that one of them said put me back a semester because, at the time, I believed all his jeering to be true. He blurted out negative thoughts that I had about myself and brought them into existence. They were reinforced by that professor. 

 

I basically paid $3000+ for this man to call me dumb for a whole semester.  

 

I’m still reeling from that experience, and I’m hoping that in this semester I can carry the same energy.