One Scene – Raul Medina

When we reached the 5th floor the hallways were beautiful it was filled with pictures of students and even work they did in their classes. His classroom was pretty far for the most part but when we got there there was a fair share of students in his class they seemed like people my age. We sat down at the front of the classroom, I started to take off my bag so I could get my backpack as I pulled out my homework, I started to overthink too myself that he’d call me stupid or wouldn’t even want to help me anymore I always felt as if people gave up on me when didn’t understand. But sooner or later I grew the courage to do so and when I showed my work he wasn’t mad or confused, especially about the methods I had chosen to solve certain equations It was very unorthodox because not many people understood the methods I had chosen. “ why do use such complicated methods to solve equations despite the answer being right?” He told me in a confused tone. “ Because I want to be different I didn’t want to be like other kids in the room”.

1 thought on “One Scene – Raul Medina”

  1. Notice that you are doing too much telling. WHAT is going on here? Lacking clarity here! Where is this happening? What club? Are you describing the coding club you joined? Who was the teacher? What was your first activity?

    I am unclear how this joins with the other writing HWs. I thought you were writing about joining the coding club, but nothing in this piece of writing above shows me it’s a coding club.

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    When we reached the 5th floor the hallways were beautiful it was filled with pictures of students and even work they did in their classes. His [WHOSE?] classroom was pretty far for the most part but when we got there there was a fair share of students in his class they seemed like people my age.

    We [WHO?] sat down at the front of the classroom, [CS COMMA SPLICE sentence errors – go to Grammar Writing skills page—fix by FULL STOP PERIOD] I started to take off my bag so I could get my backpack as I pulled out my homework, [CS] I started to overthink too myself that he’d [WHO?]call me stupid or wouldn’t even want to help me anymore I always felt as if people gave up on me when didn’t understand.

    But sooner or later I grew the courage to do so and when I showed my work [Is this a first day activity? WHAT problem? WHAT activity?] he wasn’t mad or confused, especially about the methods I had chosen to solve certain equations It was very unorthodox because not many people understood the methods I had chosen.

    WHO said this? “ why do use such complicated methods to solve equations despite the answer being right?” He told [ASKED?] me in a confused tone.

    “ Because I want to be different I didn’t want to be like other kids in the room”.

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