Considering the five elements we talked about today in class (beginnings, detail, dialogue, transitions, endings), which do you see as a strength in your draft? Which do you feel like needs more work? For both, explain why.
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Course Description: A course in effective essay writing and basic research techniques including use of the library. Demanding readings assigned for classroom discussion and as a basis for essay writing
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Ursula C. Schwerin Library
New York City College of Technology, C.U.N.Y
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I feel like my opening is solid. Im painting the picture as to why i felt the way i did about education. It stems from my parents and cultural background. I think my ending may be a little rushed. But its hard to make an ending when my story isnt over yet. Im living it right now
I feel like the ending is a strength because it raps up well and has a clear narrative and meaning. I think the others need some work. My detail isn’t as good as it could be I could describe certain things better. I barely have any dialogue in the text and should add more. The transitions make sense to me but may not make sense to reader so I will work on that
out of all 5 I think my draft has more detail and transitions through out it. since im writing about a teffent in my life I am explain everything in detail and using time transition words to tell the story. I think my story is lacking dialogue mainly because I cant remember the conversations I had with the people mentioned in the story.
Details are my draft strong suit. I examined every one of my statements. I also explained the reasons for my statements. I also used all 5 w’s, which help to clarify my position. Finally, I went into great detail about the setting to help people visualize and understand what I was doing. on the other hand, my weakness is dialogue. I didn’t use any of it in my draft.
I feel as though my strength is at the beginning but my weak point is the dialogue as I haven’t thought of what will be said in my essay.
I see my beginnings as my strength because it had an impact on me that is still vivid in my memories. It’s also somewhat like the start of a new me that I encountered, so I think that’s interesting. I feel like my transitions needs more work because I don’t know how to make it flow and instead I write out the narrative as if it were a fact instead of telling a personal narrative.
I think I have a natural strength for detail that’s most demonstrated in my writing. I like to express action with poetry and paint pictures with my words, but dialogues have never been my strong suit. I want to include dialogue in my piece for the effect of it. A lot of my narrative is internal, I did a lot of talking to myself as a means of learning about myself and from myself so I’d like to include that but I have difficulty stringing it together. I said very few words in what I learned.
The beginning is my strength because I feel like I did a good job at giving background as to what I’m going to talk about. I’m struggling with transition because I feel as if I’m all over the place with my paragraphs and it’s not concerting the way I want it to.
What I see as a strength in my draft is my beginning, and details. Those two are most easy for me because I am good with explaining in my introduction, without giving too much information, so it can leave the readers in a cliffhanger. Details are just something that I feel is simple to do, because you are using imagery in your head to remember every moment in that specific scene. I feel like my transitions are not bad, but also not good, I definitely think its something I can improve on because I get stuck on how to start my new paragraph. I don’t have an ending yet, but I feel like that’s also one of my strengths, which is to conclude my overall story. I don’t have much dialogue, because I can never remember the exact words said, so that needs more work.
I think I would say my beginning would be the strength to my draft just because I think it has a lot in it. And I think I need more work my my detail and dialogue like there’s isn’t enough action or emotions like the small details about it .
I think one of the strengths in my writing is the beginning, because of the way I depict the scene and the harmony that produces when it’s read. I think it is also interesting, at least for the people I have shown it to.
One of the weaknesses I am trying to work out are the transitions between paragraphs, since the flashbacks and reflections included are not closely related, it is kind of difficult to transition.
I feel as though that in my draft the beginning would be the strongest out of the others. The reason being is that I tend to always follow up, revise, and rework my wording throughout my drafts. That being said the beginning would end up with the most work and polish than the other elements. On the contrary the ending would most likely need the most work. When I tend to come to the conclusions in my draft I lack the willpower to really go on, seeing that I’m already at the end.
In my draft, I believe that the strength of my draft was the detail I had added. I believe that I explained and gave adequate examples that helped the reader to understand the message I wanted to bring across. I think that I could have used more transitional words to give my work a better flow and make it easier to make connections from one paragraph to another.
I felt that the beginning and the details part are my strongest because I try to provide the image of what was happening in the story by describing everything single thing in details. However I think that I need to work on my conclusion because it look very weak because I don’t have more ideas and I don’t have how to conclude my draft.