I canāt really think of a specific time I felt anonymous, like my story was untold or forgotten . I do feel there has been a point in time where the people around me didnāt really know me . Honestly Iāve always been content with being around a small group of people or alone. There has been times where I felt I was disconnected from a lot of the people around me. Most people say that Iām mature for my age and that my mindset isnāt like most. During my last year in high school I felt that I had outgrown a lot of people. Many all throughout high school who I guess were considered āfriendsā at the time no longer felt that way when it came down to it. I started to feel as though I didnāt value the same things they did.
I understand that you can be friends with people and have different opinions and value systems. However I felt it was deeper than that. Something in me felt that the trials through high school showed me who was genuine and who wasnāt. The anonymous feeling would be when I had a lot of people around me yet only a few who understood me. I knew what I wanted and there was just certain things I didnāt feel the need to associate myself with any longer. I know that Iām not the only person who felt this way Iāve heard others say the same thing. When I went my separate ways from people I didnāt necessarily announce it I just slowly started to keep my distance and eventually I feel they understood.
Sometimes people get offended when you no longer want to maintain a relationship they take it personally. Theyāll take it as you attacking their character and become defensive. In all honesty if it was me and roles were reversed I wouldnāt feel any type of way. In life i have learned that sometimes people only come into your life in order to teach you something but they are not meant to stay. If Iāve outgrown anyone it doesnāt mean I have any sort of animosity towards that person it is simply that I have outgrown the circumstances that I was in. Sometimes itās better to go separate ways in order to grow and become your own person. In way I felt trapped in my high school being that I was with the same people from grades 6-12. I wasnāt able to expand and have other options. Finally after my senior year was complete I would get to escape and be exposed to new environments. If I had a chance to go back I donāt think I would change my decisions because in life sometimes you just have to do whatās best for you especially if it is evident that people may not have your best interest at heart.
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