I was born and raised in New York until I was nine years old, but my parents are from Indonesia. They decided to move back to Indonesia because my grandpa was sick. My parents separated after we moved to Indonesia in 2013. I have been living with my mom while visiting my dad every other weekend. In August 2018, I decided to leave my family behind and pursue my future in New York. At first, my dad was hesitant and worried for me because he felt like I would not be able to survive on my own. I was initially upset because I hoped for him to encourage me instead of being discouraging. Still, I understand that he looked out for me as his only child. I was nervous and scared because I would have to travel 24 hours from Indonesia to New York by myself and transit to Abu Dhabi with a 4-hour layover.

On the day of my departure, my mom and grandparents dropped me off along with my closest friends. It felt like my mom was my only support because she taught me how to maneuver at an airport, where to check my gates, and what I needed to do as soon as I landed in New York. She wanted me to feel safe and comfortable while traveling as if she was with me during the entire trip. She was the last person I saw before I went through the security check, and she gave me the longest hug while holding her tears back. I held my tears back, too, because we promised not to cry since we would see each other again. After a quick motivational speech from her, I took a deep breath, walked through security, and went straight to my gate.

Even though I was born here, there have been a lot of changes in the last ten years. As soon as I arrived in New York, I met my mom’s friend, Nicole, who agreed to become my guardian for six months until I got my flow in the city. She was accommodating and showed me around the city. I started college a week after I arrived in New York, hiding my feelings from my family and Nicole. I found myself crying the third night I spent in Nicole’s apartment because I started feeling homesick and doubted whether I would succeed in the city. In seventeen years, I genuinely felt alone, nervous, and scared for the first time. I did not have any friends yet and was eager to find a job to help my mom pay for my tuition and daily necessities. One day, I watched a video on YouTube about a girl that left her family to pursue her college degree in LA. I was going through the same boat as her, and the video supported and motivated me. I realized that we all need to step out of our comfort zone to thrive and grow as an individual. In other words, as much as I love being in the comfort of living with my mom, I was meant to be independent and pursue what I believe is best for me. After a year, I quickly adapted to the city and made good friends, was promoted at my jobs, experienced irreplaceable moments at concerts, and found a healthy life balance.