Throughout life, I’ve encountered many relationships with people, built bonds with them, had my fun which many didn’t last, or the bond wasn’t strong enough. Never had a friend whom I felt confident enough to call a best friend. I wasn’t searching for a friend, but I knew I wanted my own friend. We all do, we need someone we can confide in, look for them when we need a laugh, or speak about our relationship problems. I met that friend she is all these things and more. She’s different from the other friends I had, she’s special, bold but the good kind. One that’d tell you what you needed to hear when necessary. I can’t even remember how we met, but it was during my sophomore year. It was all a blur that lead to something good. An instant magnetic connection is what it felt like finally finding my own friend.

It’s always me and her, we’re inseparable. There’s never a time you see me, and you don’t see her. If I’m alone it’s always “yo where is _____?”. We are always together, when we’re outside we’re constantly asked if we are twins, we get that question so often we ended up just going with it. Telling people that we’re fraternal twins. We’re both tall, slim same frame, and dress very similar. She’s literally my other half. We’ve grown to love each other through our ups and downs. Last year she tore one of her ligaments playing basketball, which was hard on her it stopped her from playing the sport she loved and looked forward to at school. While I and my friends remained playing, still attending school, and doing whatever we normally did. She had to stay home; I can only imagine how she felt watching us on our Snapchat having fun. She became a little distant. Being cooped up in your room can be depressing, people deal with their emotions differently, but I’ve never experienced this situation with anyone before. I took it as maybe she didn’t want to be bothered and wanted to just absorb what has happened to her, or at least that’s what I would’ve wanted.

We were young and was basically my first real one on one friendship I was learning how to be a better friend. She noticed a change and confronted me about it, she didn’t like how we became distant in the time of her not being at school. It had only been a week or two of missed school. I told her I understood that, apologized but told her it was mainly because she wasn’t in school, we’re not seeing each other every day, all day anymore and she couldn’t really expect the relationship to be exactly the same. We were used to seeing each other so often, this switch was kind of weird. She told me she understood what I said, I went by her house later that week and we spoke and gisted about what she’s missed during school. and how she’s been feeling. It was a relief to get over the misunderstanding. For a couple of long fun years, we were typical young teens enjoying our summers. Went to parties, even threw parties, had picnics, went on adventures, and just grew.

Good things are sometimes too good to be true, and history always repeats itself. There were multiple occasions where she’d question our friendship and accuse me of not being into our friendship as much as her, which I found so weird, like I said earlier it was always me and her, she was basically my only friend that I confide to. What more did she want from me? I did everything a friend needed to do, stayed by her side when things were rough, did everything with her, always looked to her for support, hung out with her 24/7. We are adults now, no longer in High School, our relationship will change, no more same high school schedule. We both had jobs and personal things to cater to. Why was I being confronted for not calling her not enough, when we still talked on the phone often, why did it become a competition of who’s calling who? Wasn’t it the phone conversation that mattered? I felt like she became overly obsessed with trying to perfect a friendship that was already fine, not only to me but to everyone outside of our friendship. She pushed away from me randomly snapping at me about party details, in a friend message group chat. I couldn’t think of a reason to embarrass your BEST FRIEND, in front of other people, over something so small no matter what! It was clear that it probably was not going to work out, the hidden animosity was transparent at that moment. We wanted different things. It wasn’t my intention to let her go but it was clearly hers. We tried to rekindle the friendship that we promised not to be broken many times.  As much as I didn’t want to end it, it was for the best. Having someone who constantly doubts the friendship begins to overwhelm you. If it’s not clear we do not speak, she eventually cut ties with me and then the rest of our friends. As hurtful as it sounds I do not wish to be friends again.