https://docs.google.com/document/d/1NoDdlBA7FDpTXGEjrQ1Z5NPINti12EyPgnTDzoqgJ_A/edit?usp=sharing
Composition 1
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Indeevari,
Great essay! I think you did a great job critically analyzing “The Money”. Be careful, though. In the first paragraph, you write, “author,there”. I think you are missing a space after the comma. I found instances like this throughout your essay, so just be careful. I really liked your conclusion. The way that you finished the essay by writing, “Those two stories suggest that rather than always depending completely on the authority to solve our problems for us, maybe we should sometimes try and take matters in our own hands, and such a more personal type of approach to the matter might bring better results than the routine procedures performed by trained professionals.” I thought that this did a great job taking the concepts behind each of the stories and relating it to the real world, and current events! Try to include in-text citations, but otherwise, good job overall!
Hi Indeevar, you did a good job on your essay! I love how much detail you pointed out on”The money” and your analysis on it. When you stated “In “The Money”, I find it very odd and intriguing: “Everybody got hit; no matter who you were, eventually it would be your turn”. If the author was not over- exaggerating, then it seems that his neighborhood was lawless and the crime wave eventually affected everyone sooner or later.” When you said you find it “odd” then explained why is perfect. However you should explain more about how”The Money is connected to “The Purloined Letter”,such as language they share, theme etc… Other then that keep up the good work.
I enjoyed reading your essay, Indeevari. I find it very interesting when you asked the question about the police, “Why does the narrator think it is pointless to report the robbery to the police? He compares “calling the police” to being as “useless as crying.”” However, I feel like you need to explain the quotes a little bit more. Additionally, after the quotation write, in the parenthesis, the author’s last name and a page number. Do not forget to do the works cited page as well.
Hi,
I thoroughly enjoyed your essay. The word choice was spot on and you managed to compare the two stories without oversharing and giving too many details. When you quote from these works remember to use MLA citation, “Quote” (Author,Page number). And remember that your final draft needs a works cited page.
Hey Indeevari! Great job! There’s a few minor grammatical errors so just read over it! But more importantly, there’s no citations, make sure you write it as (Author’s last name, pg#) and have an MLA format reference pg at the end!