ENG1121, Section D421: English Composition, SP2016

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  • WEEK OF FEBRUARY 22: Writing in Different Registers
  • #35428

    Mike Passarelli

    A New Encounter – Original Version

    My time aboard the USS Kentucky was, in it’s own way, the most terrifying experience of my life. I reported on board in early July, and to be quite honest, the skull-drudgery of my morning ablutions are a vague haze, but I remember quite clearly, standing on the topside of the submarine in the hot July sun, staring down a ladder well. A cool breeze floated up from the bowels of the submarine, and a sharp chemical sting bite my nose. I awkwardly ambled down the ladder, and set foot on solid linoleum. The interior of the boat was brightly lit by florescent bulbs, and a constant, knocking din of machine noise percolated through the background hum of the fans. My chief was waiting at the bottom of the ladder, who clapped me on a shoulder with a handshake, and pointed his knife hand down another ladder going down at a shallow angle, saying, “Go on down there and ask the goddammit, the, the CAMP watch, and he’ll sure as shit tell ya where ta go.”
    I managed a feverish nod and a terse “Yes, Chief!” and hustled down the stairs. There are only a few colours used when painting the interior of a submarine; beige, grey, red, and seafoam green. I stumbled down the ladder well and started my walk down the passage way. I shortly arrived at the desk of the CAMP watch, a young man not too much older than myself, with a gun and a clipboard gave me a head nod and a fist bump.
    “Oh, shit, are you the new guy? We’re getting a new guy? Aight, wait here I’mma call the LPO.”
    This was the first few minutes of a day that proved to be long and tiring; it started there, and I soon learned the truth behind the old adage: “The only Easy Day was Yesterday.”

    New Encounter – Child Register

    The first time I was ever aboard a submarine, a big boat that goes underwater, was actually very scary. I had to climb down a ladder that ran through a tube until I was finally inside. The air smelled really weird and it was very noisy all around me because of all the fans in the ventilation. There were so many other people, already there, running around and working hard. I did not know where to go. My new boss found me at the bottom of the ladder, and he introduced himself to me. He pointed down another ladder to another hallway, and told me to go find the man on watch. I walked down the ladder, and had to squeeze my way down the narrow hallway to find the man on watch. Everything was painted grey, or beige, or red, or even seafoam green! I eventually found the man on watch, who was sitting at a desk, with a gun on his hip. He smiled and said hello to me, and told me he was going to call my new boss.


    Mohammed Dawan

    First time in 42nd street.

    The first time I went to 42nd street was about 5 years and I can recall it with extreme vivid. When I got off the train, the smell of gas tackled me. The varieties of foods and hundreds of different perfumes and colognes stung the air. The sight of countless people walking in their own world alongside another person; as if they didn’t exist. The sound was the worst, the honking, yelling, laughter. Flashes of neon lit advertisement on colossal televisions that are attached to powerful buildings made me feel as if I was in the Jetsons. I can recall the aura of anxiety forcing me to find a place to go or just walk endlessly to anywhere. The feel of hundreds of bodies bumping into mine and then the half sincere apologies that followed afterwards is what made realize what I’ve been missing out for years. All my senses felt as it were on a bad batch of estacy, which I can say with confidence, is why this is my most memorable encounter.


    avril padilla

    My first visit to Maryland was a wonderful one. The ride there was relaxing because I slept most of the way. Once we got in the state, I was amazed to see that It reminded me of home. The fact that it was quiet and peaceful, and to see folks walking to their destinations without drawing attention to themselves was quite refreshing. To not see people playing music loudly and talking on their phone as though they want the world to know their business, was very pleasing. I saw a lot of open space where families can get together unlike crowded Brooklyn. A lot of greenery, trees and plants which I enjoyed looking at. The roads reminded me long trips that I had taken in the past to visit family. To see kids playing outside and on the playground gave me a sense of wanting to live there. It felt like a good place to live without the drama of the fast life here in New York.


    avril padilla

    Well Mohammed, I had a different experience of 42nd Street. My first visit there was a disaster. I kept wanting to go home. Taking the subway there was discussing. People were farting up the entire section, then it smelled of a homeless person to the point I didn’t want to sit on the seat. The fact that people kept pushing me to get in made it even worst, After that awful ride, on the street while walking to my destination, folks kept bumping into me as if they didn’t see me their. Then I saw people spitting on the street as though it was nothing made me feel sick for home. The only good thing was the lights and the many shopping stores I saw along the way. My favorite was Toys R Us, to see one store with three or four levels of toys was exciting. I enjoyed looking at the lights on my way the eat at BBQ’s. After all that trouble it was worth it in the end. I had a great time eating out with my family.


    Alexis Sosa

    Original Version:

    The first time I visited New York City I was astonished at how enormous every building was compared to the building I was used to back in North Carolina. One of the first things I noticed while on my visit was how convenient a deli could be with a verity of food and other miscellaneous things which was new to me since I was only used to stores and fast food places such as Wal-Mart and Burger King. I remember the feeling I swiping my first metro card before getting on the Q train and how amazing it was to head anywhere in the city with only a simple $2.25. I remember thinking ” I would love to live here” having everything conveniently close and having a great and easy way of transportation without the need of a drivers license.

    Directed towards a Child:

    When I first came to visit New York City I was surprised at how big all the buildings were. There were many stores nearby such as deli’s which had many kinds of food and there were people who worked there that prepared almost any kind of food you wanted. It was a good feeling when I first got on one of the trains and even better since it could take me anywhere I wanted to go. New York city is such a great place since I can get food whenever I want and go wherever I want to go.



    The first time I went to my parent’s home, China, was an experience I didn’t enjoy. First was the enormous difference between the two lifestyles that I was forced to get used to for the temporary visit. I saw my parent’s friend’s and families which lives in a small village. There were some things I saw that bothered me though, there was smog that could be seen from afar and the fact that I was stared deep down like I was an alien. The lifestyles in the village is very uncomfortable since everything is done manually.

    Directed towards a child:
    I once visited my parent’s home country and it was China, it isn’t close to what you’re seeing right now. The part of China I visited was a small village where my parent’s know their friends and families since birth. China isn’t clean but rather yet, its very dirty and it’s difficult to get to destinations if in a village. The people might first see you as an individual because of how you’re dressed and act, since parenting in China is really strict, so its normal to feel out of place when your parents are talking to catch up old times.



    My New Encounter to a place…

    My first time in San Francisco was nothing like I thought it would be. It’s not a big city like New York. The first time I went to San Francisco with my family was during the summer of 2014. Everything is so different and nothing like the way we expected it to be. Their population isn’t as big as New York but their traffic is really bad. People were so nice where ever you went. The streets are hard to walk up because it’s like walking up a hill. The best part was being able to see the scenery where ever you go. If you ever end up at a really high end street, you can overlook the whole city. Although San Francisco is a nice place to visit, there isn’t much to do since it’s a small city. We visited for a week and were able to explore the whole city in three days. Everything was just so close and nearby that it wasn’t a long travel time.

    Explained to a child…

    San Francisco is a really nice place to visit in the summer. There are many places to see but not many things to do. Houses here are built in all different colors. Walking can be a tiring thing because walking up hill is really hard. Everything is so close by together that it wasn’t hard to go around and visit many places.



    My first encounter of Queens New York was a major stomp on my imagination. Moving here from my vacation in sunny Florida thinking that I was moving to a place where I see on the movies and television shows was a total disaster. My dad took us to Hillside Queens because that’s where we were staying at the time. As we got there we went on a walk for something to eat. It was mid-august and the sun was shinning bright in the sky but Hillside queens was still dull. It was like a black and white movie to me. I wanted to go back to the sunshine state so badly but that wasn’t happening till next summer. As we walked around looking for something to eat, I noticed people weren’t as friendly as they were in Florida. They would look down at the sidewalk or straight ahead where as in Florida passersby would say hi, hello or good morning and so forth. This made my older brother and I extremely sad because we were used to friendliness whilst New York was full of hostility.

    To a child:
    When we were moving to New York I was excited to see what we would see on TV or movies. Remember the TV show Jessie? Well that’s what I thought when we were moving to New York would be like. Daddy took us to a place called Queens and it was kind of ugly and not inviting as how great Florida looked. I thought people would be nice to me. I was sad because queens NY wasn’t as pretty as Florida. I wanted to go back to the pretty pool and beaches!



    Briana Roldan

    When I first met my girlfriend
    Perspective: Describing encounter to a Grandparent
    I sat on the floor in the school gym as people around me gossiped about everyone else in high school. No one spoke to me and in turn, I didn’t speak either. She walked over to me, dressed in a burgundy sweatshirt that had writing on it in white letters, her pants were light blue, and her boots were black. Her hair was dark brown with a blonde color at the ends. Her tan complexion made her stand out compared to the dull, un-waxed wood floors of the gym. When she smiled at me, it reached her eyes, making them a close a little. Her smile was warm, inviting, beautiful, and all too contagious. When I first spoke to her, it was a conversation about music. I didn’t realize just how far this conversation would go. I didn’t realize how close we became in such a short time. I didn’t realize much I would come to love and appreciate t her. I didn’t realize just how beautiful she was until I really understood her, until I looked past all of the trivial things. You know grandpa, when I sit down and talk about my relationship and the love that I share with this girl, it reminds me so much of the love you had for grandma. I remember when you two were together, you were always so happy and grandma had the smile that reached her eyes too. Thinking of you and grandma together makes me appreciate the love I have found, it makes me appreciate being able to experience and encounter such a beautiful person.


    JieRu Lin

    It was the first day of eighth grade, as a transferred student, I know nothing about the school, I had no friends there, and everything was new to me. When I walked into my classroom, everyone looked me like I walked into a wrong classroom. But something as drawn my attention, I t was a cool looking guy sitting in front of row, he was wearing the coolest outfits that I had ever seen in my life, the style and color were well mixed together. I walked up to him and said “hey, I like your senses of fashion, the shirts fit well on you” And he said
    “Thanks dude, I like yours too.” This is where the story of our friendship begins.

    It was the first day of class, I walked into my classroom, and the first thing I saw was a cool looking guy sitting there with the coolest shirt. It was an American flag with well mixed color of black and red. I walked up to him and said “hey dude, I like your shirt!” He was like “Thanks.” This is how I met him.


    Melany C.

    When I first visited New York City for Christmas I was so excited to the idea to visit a place that my friends had the planned to visit in future. My cousin took me to some store to get some snack, all the varieties of product from different countries it was really interesting. When we headed to see the city I fell so tiny, the buildings were enormous. The holiday decorations made look brighter than already was, the music and people having fun was the best part. One of the first things I saw there was a lot of people which was expected for the holiday season. Got to see the Christmas Tree and Time Square which were the most expected for me as those to be the most visited or seen on television. Every time we took the train I was fascinated by those people singing or making art or any sort of entertainment. However the thing that stands out the most of this first visit was the cold weather which I was able to survive. It was a good vacation even though I hoped to see some snow.

    To child:
    When I went to New Yor for the first time, I was so happy to see those big building. I felt like Home alone 2: Lost in NY just on the right holiday. However, I didn’t have a crazy experience like he did but I was able to enjoy his happiness and excitement to be in the big city. It was super cold to the point if I didn’t wear a hat, gloves, a scarf I wouldn’t have survived. The train stations were fun with people dancing and singing and their clothes were funky and colorful to keep the Christmas season all exciting.


    My first encounter to a new place…..
    We I was about 10 years old my sister had a birthday party for my nephew. She didn’t live in the city like I did, she lived upstate New York. At the time my nephew was turning three and my family and I went to see them and celebrate his birthday. Well driving upstate I was fascinated at all the open land and how quiet it was up there. When finally reaching our destination I started to ask a whole lot of question, like what part of upstate New York were in and where’s all the big building at like in Brooklyn? Etc. that night it was hard for me to sleep in a new environment and without all the noise I’m use too, I just stood up all night playing game with my first nephew (who can with us upstate) and my second nephew (the one who birthday was in a few days). My family and I stood up there for a few days. My sister took us around her city. She asked us why don’t we consider moving upstate, the prices of a house is much cheaper than living in an apartment. She Rambled on how we can get a dog and live comfortably; etc. but at the same time I was kind of happy we visited her cause I got to see real stuff that I might only be able to see on tv. Some like a real deer that isn’t killed, a raccoon and lake, and streams that flow toward the city. It was one of the best experience I had as a kid.

    Told to a child….
    One day a young child my sister’s son was having a birthday party. She invited my family and my self to that party. I was glad she did because I alway want to visit her city, upstate New York. Well my father was driving I was looking out the window and was excited to see all the free open lab to play. When we finally met my sister at her home we went inside and talked. Later that night we all went to sleep, but it was hard for me to sleep; it was too quiet I was used to the sound of the people outside my window talking and the car driving by. So I stood up with both of my nephews, (one was 5 and the other was turning 3) playing games until we all fell a sleep. We stayed a few nights, well there my sister showed us her city. We all seen some great thing like different animals and where that water get come from (lakes and rivers and streams). I had a great time well upstate it was an exciting trip.



    When I went to work on my first construction site, I saw many materials and tools most of them where cinder blocks, wood, cement, hammers, and tools that are the size of two or three feet and this materials where in the floor dirty and full of dust. Also a lot of people where working in different type of position like one was making cement and the other was bring the cement to the guy that was putting cinder block or bricks to make the wall. It was heavy duty because trying to pick up a bag of cement or cinder blocks, taken it to the other person was heavy and someone gets tried when you have the sun shine on you and working without trying to stop because then if you stop for a minute the other guy stops too.
    To a child:
    My first time working in a construction site like building houses or building walls and roofs. It’s kind of hard because of the materials are very heavy also getting dirty by making cement so we can use it to make the walls and anything that needs cement. Also there are many people working with you so it’s fun.


    Matthew Edelmann

    my first encounter.

    Every day is a new encounter and I approach life that way. I can’t think of any first encounter that was very significant. When I walk in a room I act like I belong there even if I don’t. But the assignment is to pick a first encounter so I’ll pick my first day of middle school. I walked into my school and found out my class. I talked to people and made some friends. Some of them I am still friends with. It was an important part of my life because I stayed in that school for the next 7 years. It was a middle and high school. It was a start of something new but it wasn’t that big a deal. I went to school and it was fun. I guess the biggest difference between elementary school and middle school was the fact that there were girls in my middle school but not my elementary school. I liked having girls in my class for the same reasons any straight boy would like it. I made friends with both the boys and the girls. Another difference was that my class was twice as big as my last school. That is my story. I would tell it the same way weather I was talking to a kid or an adult.



    My first encounter of Montreal began at the border. I decided that summer to travel alone to Montreal via the Amtrak. After long hours on the train, we arrived at the border. The security officials stopped the train for about an hour and a half to interrogate people. They literally went to each person, even myself, stared at our eyes and asked us several questions. Some of the questions that they asked were, ” Why are you coming to Canada? ” “who do you know here” ” What do you do in the U.S” ? Although these were simple questions, the way the officials presented the question were quite frightening. What made me nervous was that after 8-9 hours on the Amtrak, I’ve witnessed some other people being forced to return to NY due to problems with their documentation. When I finally arrived to Montreal, I was amazed at the European type of culture they had and the beauty that the city had.

    After a long year of hard work and watching your kids stress you out, I think it’s time that you consider taking a vacation. I know you may not have the luxury of time or money but with a few hundred dollars you can go to a place that is not so far away from home and relax for once. You see I took a trip to Montreal in 2014 and for the little time I was there, I’ve never felt tranquil before. Montreal has a lot of large land, parks, and private places. When you go to Montreal during late August or early September you will find that most parks are empty, you or your partner can go together and either have a picnic or have fun spending some alone time. If you’re looking for fun, Montreal is the city also. During the summer there are a lot of free and fun festivals. Also, if you want to you can go to Mont Royal where you have a beautiful view of the city, eat Montreal’s famous “Poutine” and drink wine while watching the sunset. Go out and relax, you will thank me later.

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