Esteemed Students,
DON’T FORGET! On Monday, Sept. 28, there are NO classes at City Tech, and on Tuesday Sept. 29, the college follows a Monday schedule. So we’ll meet Tuesday 11:30am-12:45pm! (On Wednesday the college is back on Wednesday schedule, so we’ll meet then too.) To prepare for our discussion of cover letters in Tuesday’s class, please review the samples linked below as well as the sample in M&M pp. 41-44. By 10am Tuesday, please “reply” to this post with your response to one (or more) of the letters. In your reply, please provide at least one compliment (something you like) and one suggestion (something that could be done better). We’ll discuss your responses in Tuesday’s class! Then you’ll write your own cover letter to the employer identified in your OL post, which you’ll email to me by 10am Wednesday. See Resume & Cover Letter Assignment for details.
Enjoy the weekend,
Prof. C.
Reviewing B. Bates Cover Letter
One compliment I’d like to give on Betty Bates cover letter is the organization! I can’t stress it enough but organization is vital for a good cover letter.
One suggestion I’d like to give on Betty Bates cover letter is not being overly modest and expectational. Being modest is important when it comes to professionalism, but saying “If this position has not yet been filled and you believe we would work well together, I would enjoy meeting with you at your earliest convenience.” It is not about what you want it’s about what they want, so Betty shouldn’t have expectations.
Thanks Zainab!
Reviewing Y. Suarez cover letter
One compliment that id like to give Y. Suarez is that the resume attached with the letter was a good thing because that shows that you are well prepared and organized and that your humble not just putting what you want upfront but you giving the people a chance to know who you are so that they can choose to hire you or not.
One suggestion that i can give is that on the educational part of the resume the courses that you took regarding to law didn’t have to be added there because if you got you bachelors in law then the person hiring should already know that you had to take law classes on order to get a degree in it.
Thanks Esther!
After reviewing S.Kyle’s cover letter, one thing I really like about her that she put out all the volunteer work she has done and her education. One thing I would like to suggest her that she could’ve used more formal language, it seems little unprofessional.
After scanning through Y- Suarez I especially admired how fit he described all the accomplishments that he obtained. I think he should add what are the elements that he has an excellent grip on.
Thanks Amatul!
After scanning through Y- Suarez I especially admired how fit he described all the accomplishments that he obtained. I think he should add what are the elements that he has an excellent grip on.
Thanks Mian!
After scanning through Y- Suarez I especially admired how fit he described all the accomplishments that he obtained. I think he should add what are the elements that he has an excellent grip on.
RE: S.Kyle Cover Letter
I genuinely like the structure on which this cover letter was written. I firmly believe when writing anything professional, organization, grammar, detail (but also getting to the point) matters a lot.
On the other hand, I do believe that S.Kyle could do a better job at briefly mentioning how their skills can benefit the firm, instead of telling them to feel free to contact them. This is just because on cover letters, you’ll want to sell yourself and make the interviewers impressed and **WANT** to contact you further.
Overall, it’s an okay cover letter, but just like everything else, can be improved.
Thanks Tevin!
B Bates cover letter review
Betty’s outline and format of her cover letter was on point , it was enough information for the employer.
One thing i suggest is that she leaves out the part where she tells the employer she will call them to set up an interview.
Thanks Sherona!
One compliment i would give to betty bates is the content and enthusiasm her letter presented.
One suggestion i would give to betty bates is to remove the last line ” i will call you within the week”. while it might strike others as bold, it may generally come across as over confident, cocky or even entitled. Which are not impressions you want to give to your possible future employer.
A compliment i would give to betty bates is the content and enthusiasm her letter presented. She quickly presented her interest, education and employment to justify her wanting to work at the firm.
One suggestion i would give to betty bates is to remove the last line ” i will call you within the week”. while it might strike others as bold, it may generally come across as over confident, cocky or even entitled. Which are not impressions you want to give to your possible future employer.
One compliment I have for O. Abussalaam is the structure of the cover letter, short and her professionalism when writing this letter.
A suggestion I have is not saying she doesn’t have firsthand experience being too humble instead get right to the point of her experiences that qualifies and makes her perfect candidate for the job.
Thanks Carmen!
Y. Suarez cover letter.
It’s actually a very good cover letter everything is well explained and organized. One suggestion I have is to keep everything on one side. For example, her name and address should be in the same side as the where the company’s name and address is.
Thanks Yadira!
After reviewing Betty Bates’ cover letter, I liked that she was straight to the point, however, I believe that she should have explained more on why she would be the best candidate for that job.
Thanks Ninmah!
Reviewing O. Abdussalaam cover letter.
I liked how O.Abdussalaam was clear about the position they wanted as well as how they made a personal connection to the job. However I feel like they should remove the first sentence of their second paragraph. This sentence seems more like a filler sentence and doesn’t add anything.
Thanks Michelle!
One compliment that I have for Selina Kyle is that I felt as if they did a good job with placement of their personal information, spacing it out from the rest. Also I feel as if they did a good job with putting down their goals and accomplishments but I feel as if they should of added more of their personal skills, and what they can bring to the table.
Thanks Daziah!