I think I was coping really well with the coronavirus situation until yesterday, when I started to feel…worse, sort of about everything. Even trivial stuff. Do I have enough waffles? No? Why is that important? How often can I wash my hands? It’s like I’m looking for reassurance from trivial things — things, that I know on a logical level don’t really help, and yet I want them.
Only one waffle left? Oh no! That’s my favorite tea cup, btw. I always need tea.
I’m definitely hibernating more than usual, and am watching way more TV than ever. It’s what I want to do, or so I tell myself.
I don’t think that hoarding or over-shopping or panicking are good ideas. No. Yet, to reassure my boyfriend, I went and did some more major grocery shopping, and took a cab home. I don’t want to be one of those people cleaning out the store shelves, but it’s almost like that behavior, itself, is what’s catching.
My brother has helped me a lot. He has been through so many things, and is much older than I am, and his phone conversations help me put stuff in perspective. He thinks that the more cases that are reported, the better things are actually getting, because that means that people are actually being properly diagnosed and that the countries’ health organizations are finally getting into gear and becoming more effective in stopping the spread. He also told me that lots more money is being allocated to stopping the spread, and that funding, itself, is going to help. He thinks things will get worse, but that means, in a strange way, that they are definitely going to get better. Should I believe him?
I burnt the waffle after all.
One good thing I am noticing out of all this: I really value community much, much more. I am so grateful for the fact that I get to see good people, in dedicated groups and settings, all the time. People who live in isolated areas can’t say that.
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