English 1101 Fall 2019 Section 342
Composition 1
The OpenLab is an open-source, digital platform designed to support teaching and learning at City Tech (New York City College of Technology), and to promote student and faculty engagement in the intellectual and social life of the college community.
The way you began your essay on how you thought about you work then and how your views change on your work now is great but you can add more details on specific moments that show them helping you that made you change or more moments of them encouraging you to try harder.
I liked the way you included how your teacher pushed you to write better and try harder, your essay needed more details, How did your teacher influence you. I felt like it was too short and got to the point really fast.
I feel like you could of went more in depth in some parts like where were these insecurities coming from? How did you get you self motivated? But, overall I did enjoy your essay and how you discussed your flow and overcoming it.
I liked the topic of your essay, however I feel like it needs more details because the essay comes off as short; Maybe talk about the influence your teachers had on you in depth or how you motivated yourself to put more effort when it comes to your school work.
I honestly enjoyed your essay although, the intro was a great way to catch a readers attention and it was well written. Although I do feel as if you could have went more in depth and made the essay longer. More details needed.
I like how you included that you changed and that another persons option influenced you . You can improve on adding more details and knowing when and where to put punctuation so there aren’t no run on sentences. Overall great draft.
I like your essay because it is motivated. I like how you explain how you change. Also I like the topic of the essay. Something you could improve is go more deep into details.
I liked the topic of your essay and how you talked about how your teacher encouraged you, can you go more in depth about this? It would be nice to know how she pushed you and the steps she had to take as well as the obstacles you had to overcome
I feel like you should write more about how this experience helped you the essay could use more details maybe include what motivated you to not give up and keep trying in school and writing your essays also had a few grammatical errors but, I like how you choose this experience to write about and how you mentioned that you learned from this experience but you should definitely expand on that.
I liked the topic of your essay because it showed how much you grew as a person. Not everyone can be the best but you continued to try and that’s what matters most. I feel like this essay can be improved if you added details about what your teacher did to motivate you further. You can also expand on what you did after your experiences with your teachers.
I really liked your essay topic. It was very relatable. Throughout your essay you say “I wondered how’d I get to be part of this group,” can you elaborate on what that means, like were there different academies in your school, it would be interesting to see that. You did a good jod of going straight to the point but maybe you can add more details on how your teachers motivated you. I really liked your essay.
I like how you choose this experience to write about and how you mentioned that you learned from this experience but you should definitely expand on that.
I thought you gave good examples on how your teachers helped you which made you better academically. The only thing is I thought you could add some more details to give the reader something more to read.
This is a very well written essay, with very emphasis on why and how the teachers helped you academically, however I believe there should be more detail to strengthen the points of why and how they helped you.
This is a very well written essay, with very emphasis on why and how the teachers helped you academically, however I believe there should be more detail to strengthen the points of why and how they helped you.
I really like how you felt about yourself in the first paragraph. But, I think you should add more details about the essay you wrote and fix some grammar .
This is a great essay. You explained very well about how your teachers helped you. Fix some grammar mistakes and just a few more details.