WORKING TITLE FOR MY OP-ED: deception of video games
MY Genre: op-ed
Introduction
- HOOK:reference articles headlines then have a personal statement.
- (Research)of video games affecting kids.
The little known facts:
- business practices on video games.
- The people who call the shots.
- The system that they follow.
Personal narrative:
- My own experience as a gamer.
- My behavior changes.
- A list of things that need change.
CONCLUSION:
My message is to convince parents to be more involved in children with video games and focus on who they play with and what kind of video games they are playing.
Dear Manuel,
Here are some possible tittles I feel would work > The Deceptive World of Video Games or Exploring Deception in Video Games
I think your “personal narrative” should go before “the little known facts” so the audience can better understand your opinion and thoughts regarding this issue.
The title of your op-ed is attention grabbing. The list of changes you added can be more convincing. The Personal Narrative can help the audience connect with you and can help them realize if they are the same way. The conclusion is strong, it focuses on parents that can be more involved and this is a important topic to have parents read about in the modern world.
Manuel: Your title does not show that your topic is the connection (or is the supposed connection between video gaming (or playing video gaming) and violence. Isn’t that what you did research on?
In the part called “little known facts” WHAT SPECIFICALLY ARE THESE FACTS? I just want to make sure that you are bringing out facts about the correlation or the non-correlation between violent behavior and gaming. So being more specific here is important.
Remmeber you need to incorporate at least TWO points learned in your RAB research.
AND I agree with your peers. You need a better more clear title.
Your outline is a little short. Are you leaving some parts out? You could be more specific in your outline, Good idea now would be to look at some student written op-eds in the Genre Project Resources page.
Good on having a clear message or what the answer is from your point of view. Remember op-ed is your point of view.
Please use the resources in the Assignment on HOW TO WRITE an op-ed. I put some good resources there.