Whom’s paper are you peer reviewing: Alex Diaz

7 points of peer review

Opener: “There it is again, the fear of not seeing tomorrow, the fear of addiction about to overwhelmed me and the fear of becoming a failure” Nevertheless, the opener is truly extraordinary that describe the suspension of the foreseen fear he has. (7 points)

The thesis statement: “ No doubt about it, I drawn in the bitterness of the influence and up took this persona that advocate violence and addiction. Yet I managed to detect the consequence and agonize in their destruction” Although, there was some grammatical errors and the thesis statement suppose to fit only one sentence, it has the qualities to makes a excellent one if he somehow combine both sentences. (5 points)

Three sub-topic paragraph: The only problem that I have with his body paragraph are the grammatical errors and usage of childish translations that repeats time to time. Other than that, it is no doubt extremely amazing. (6 points)

Translational Phrases: Nonetheless, you need to make use of efficient usage of translation other than childish ones we learned in middle school. I suggested playing around with it using greater use of vocabulary translations. (2 points)

Grammar: There are a lot of grammatical error to picked out of your writing. I suggested proof-reading once you finished your essay. (2 points)

Conclusion/thesis statement restated: I like how there’s a lesson to be learned in his universal sub topic that linked to his ideal world per say. (7 points)