E + R = O

In high school i didn’t have too many friends for many reasons so I gain few staff friends that help me so much as whole in high school but this day oh man mrs Guash and Mr Ghie came in clutch this day to help me but here’s a little back story about them. Mrs. Guash was a guidance and Ghie was dean in my school now these two staff members were the only one that believed and understood my story as a student and my behavior problem and try to help me come up with a better solution to solve my problems.
So this day I am in my US history class and my teacher Mr.Buxs assigns a group project for my class and gives a due date thats is different from whats on pupil path. Meanwhile in class of thirty kids maybe 5 to 10 kids were listening to him. So I tell mr. buxs “you do know that there is different due date on pupilpath then what you verbal said to the class” so he looks on pupilpath and it turns out I was correct. Instead of apologizing for it say its an error and warning other kids. Mr. bux basically he tells me “there is no reason why I need to act so cocky and arrogant“ at this moment every student heard him say that to me I was so embarrassed and confused that he put me on the spot why he use those words to describe me as a student. So I told him who the f**k are you talking to and how am I cocky and arrogant for helping you out.
Little do people know I was running on 4 hrs of sleep this situation can go zero to one hundred real quick. I already don’t like him or the subject and I had his class the second last period of my school day I felt like in 45 minutes we never as a class got alot done because of other students taking advantage of the teacher. He was one of those teachers that had to stop the whole class to check one student and their behavior which out of 45 minutes it takes 10 minutes for everyone to come in calm down it takes 5 minutes just for him to finish correcting students. I was always lost in class when I told him he tries to accuse me of talking to peers about things off topic is the reason why “ i’m having trouble” which isn’t true because I didn’t like anyone in class so why talk to them.
But Mr.Buxs this day he tells “ Amaya, I’m tired of you and your outburst during class and you are distracting the whole class from learning you need to learn to have self control in yourself if you dont stop im calling your mom and i’m calling school safety escort you out of my class” I reply “what are talking about all I do is come straight in classroom, on time! Take a notebook out and get started with classwork im probably the only student that does I don’t care if you call my mom im not waiting for you try to make an example out of me which is unfair.” He calls safety so they can come and I facetime my mom and I told him” I’m not leaving class because today you acting like a complete d**k, just because you had a shitty day doesn’t mean you make mine one too.”
When I look up at the door two safety agents and my dean Mr Ghie was there he tells me “Amaya come to my office your not in any trouble we need to have a little conversation so bring your belongs please come with me.” I didn’t fight or argue with Ghie I just got up went with him the whole elevator ride down to his office I was so mad and frustrated at myself because I am willing to let him get me so angry I missed out on my purpose and my reason for being in school. Ghie brings me into Mrs Guash office we both sit at a round table in her office. I gave them a play by play on what happened and they started laughing because they knew earlier that today before I went to class I didn’t want to go because “I felt his vibe will be bad, I’m not here for the shenanigans he got going on because he couldn’t find a park that morning” so the fact that not even 15 minutes and yes 15 minutes after the late bell rings . I’m back in her office yelling “Guacamole this teacher pick the wrong one, on the wrong day to f**K with me” had the whole office laughing.
So both of them sat me down and heard my side and said to me what is your goal when you walk in that class I said “prepare for the regents “ do you think want just happen in class helped or harmed you and your goal I said to her “no it harmed my goal. ” She then tells me teachers have upper hand of students because they are responsible for your grades. Teachers are human and make many mistakes, they are normally out number in classroom so when you call him out after his bad day you straw that breaks the camel’s back this doesn’t make it right what he said but you only have control of who? I said “ myself “ so in the event you want a positive outcome your response has to be positive right ? I agreed so do you believe in this event your response was positive or negative I said while rolling my eyes “it was obviously negative”
Ghie jump in and says E+R=O. Event plus response equal outcome. So next time you are put in this situation think about your outcome, you can’t control event but you can change your response so you can get the results you want. Little light bulb went off in my head and it example a lot of the disconnect from other teachers why I didn’t have a lot of friends in middle and high school. Remembering sometimes not saying anything can make you win in the event you need to respond. Wait process information on event, weigh out your option if you pick one option over the other what is your result ? And how is it different ? Is this the result you are trying to achieve if not what are you trying to do to change your results. At that very second everything made more sense than before, I left her office with a better understanding of everything. So after that day, I promise I won’t let another teacher get up under my skin. I’m in control of my education and my life I won’t let the event control me to the point I lose focus of my goal. Since that point I never argue with any teacher when it happens I just listen, wait after class to respond. So no one is pressure to act a certain way it has worked for a while, I pass it to all my friends when I have advice to give, because it has help me so much on my daily interacting with other people.