Women of all different ages have different sexual experiences. Some good and some negative. We have read about different sexual experiences throughout the semester.
During Ifemelu’s first sexual experience with Obinze she felt that it was “like a weak copy, a floundering imitation of what she imagined it would be.” meaning that she expected it to be more. Even before they had sex she stated that she expected them to make a ceremony of it. Ifemelu and Obinze didn’t use protection so Ifemelu was worried that she would get pregnant. She was irritated that she had been tense and unable to relax. Ifemelu gets sicks later in the week and believes that she’s pregnant. She calls Aunty Uju and she tells her to go to a town where nobody will know her and take a pregnancy test. Ifemelu played an active while reluctant role in her first sexual experience. She was very panicked after the experience.
In contrast Celie in The Color Purple had a very different first sexual experience from Ifemelu. Celie was raped by her step father. Celie seemed very distressed during her first time saying “he put his thing up against my hip and wiggle it around. The he grab hold my titties. Then he push his thing inside my pussy. When that hurt, I cry.” Celine did not play an active role in her sexual experience, she was taken advantage of. It was no enjoyable for her, it was more of a painful experience, physically and mentally. After the rape she was treated badly by her step father still and he raped her repeatedly. Celie blames herself because she does not yet understand that she was a victim.
There is a big difference between those two experiences. Ifemelu had a choice on whether they proceed with the experience or stop it and she said it she did not want it to stop. She wanted to experience that first time with Obinze. In Celie’s case, she never had a choice nor a voice to refuse.
I also agree on what Stephanie states that both experiences are very different from each other, when one character has a choice on sex and the other character doesn’t.
Although Ifemelu wished her first time was more ceremonial and planned out and expected it to be more, like you said she did have a choice and in the context of the moment she decided to proceed. Celie did not have the option and taken advantage of
The other major difference is that Ifemelu has knowledge about what sex is and has had a conversation with Obinze’s mother about protection. Celie doesn’t even have the words to describe what is happening to her. There is a distinct difference in the knowledge that each character has, and this also shapes their experiences.