Many points here – please read through to the end.
POINT ONE: We have been studying how writers write good openings.
Colin Powell starts with an explanation of why he chose a public university over a private university. Then he launches into his opening scene SHOWING his first day at City College with CSD.
Amy Tan starts by explaining her love of words and the fact that she is a writer. Then she launches into her opening scene SHOWING the lecture in front of a group of her readers/fans.
Obama opens his narrative with a scene with dialogue in the school cafeteria SHOWING the racism he faced in his high school.
HW 6: Due FRIDAY September 20 in OPENLAB: SHOW me your opening for your Ed Narrative. You can show me a scene with or without dialogue. Aim for two or three paragraphs. That’s all.
- Title: Opening for Ed Narrative – Your Name
- Category: Opening
- By Saturday comment on TWO student HWs. Please make meaningful comments.
POINT TWO: As I read your HW5 I have this comment to everyone. Remember that in your outline, you need specific EVENTS that move your story forward. Many of you have outlines that have NO events. THINK about Colin Powell’s narrative events:
- first day at City College
- joining ROTC
- (other events we did not discuss in class…)
- graduation day
- overall message is that public college education can take you as far as private college.
Examine what you wrote for HW 5. Ask yourself: Do I have specific important events that move my story forward? If not, RE-THINK! and RE-DO your outline!
POINT THREE: Please start to study the student example papers on the left hand sidebar of the Unit One Assignment. You will be able to see what other students did with this same assignment!
Read the student example Ed Narrative by Fan Zhou on Assignments page (go to left hard sidebar called Education Narrative Resources next to Assignment Unit One).
Notice how Fan’s story is an in-depth description of TWO scenes and how his story is in TWO parts.
- Part One is a dramatic scene of being teased and tagged with sticky notes when he was in his 6thgrade ESOL class in middle school.
- Part Two is a dramatic scene 10 years later when he is in a Language Immersion program and failing the final exam.
IN each part, notice how he focuses on one specific event and SHOWS CSD.
Notice how he DOES NOT tell me boring items. Without boring-telling-words, I understand from his dramatic scenes that he was lost in his English school environment. He was friendless and bullied. He does not need to tell me this; instead he SHOWS me all this and more. Fan writes with CSD; he uses vivid description; and he creates Theatre of the Mind for his reader.
POINT FOUR: For next week, Monday be ready to discuss:
- We will finish Obama.
- You will also read Anne Lamott: Shitty First Drafts so that you will not turn in a shitty first draft!
- BE READY TO WRITE IN CLASS — BRING WHATEVER YOU NEED.
POINT FIVE: Get to the Writing Center Tutors! I have already heard from one Writing Tutor about my students coming –Good Job! Tell your tutor to email me so I can verify attendance.
