âAww man, my mom’s gonna kill me,â I said.
âWhat grade did you get?â Dom asked.
âA 50,â I replied.
âDidnât Mr.Goorland say that was the lowest in the class?â Dom asked.
âHe did?â I said.
âYeah he said the lowest grade on this test was a 50â Dom said.
âYeah my momâs definitely taking away my PS4,â I sadly said.
My mom hated when I would come back home with bad grades on tests so I knew she would be disappointed again, especially since last time she said the next bad test score would mean my PS4 gets taken until I can focus on school.
Before middle school, I was a terrible student. My averages were always in the low-mid 60% range. This was due to me not giving my teachers much attention and not caring about my schoolwork. In grammar school, I loved being the class clown who would distract other kids just for a laugh. I started middle school the same way, not expecting to change my views on school, especially since my partner in crime, Dominick, was in my new school and class. We would always be disruptive together and the teachers hated it because we would be eager for the class to join us.
Generally, I didn’t like school so I would do everything in my power to make school fun for myself. Once we received our math test back Mr.Goorland stepped out of the room. Dominick looks at me from across the room hinting that it was âShowTimeâ. âYO Kamaroâ he said loudly in the classroom. âYO Dominickâ I replied loudly then he said âI lost my pencil can you toss me one by Mr. Goorland’s deskâ âSureâ I replied. I took a pencil from Mr.Goorlandâs desk and tossed it across the room. As soon as I tossed it Mr.Goorland walked back into the room and it hit his thick very black pair of glasses off his face. âWHO TOSSED THAT PENCIL FROM ACROSS THE ROOMâ Mr.Goorland yelled. He notices everyone in the room looking at me. âOf course, it was you Kamaro in all of my 25 years of teaching I never had such an uncaring student. Youâve been doing terrible in my class from day one but itâs ok ’cause I already graduated high school and college so Iâm not gonna suffer.â
Turn the part about the pencil throw with Dominick into a scene with dialogue using proper format.
Otherwise good stuff here.
Looking forward to your final project.
Please please keep working on shorter chunks of writing! CLEAR PARAGRAPHING!
Kamaro
Letâs turn this into a clear scene with dialogue using proper dialogue format.
Before middle school, I was a terrible student. My averages were always in the low-mid 60% range. This was due to me not giving my teachers much attention and not caring about my schoolwork. In grammar school, I loved being the class clown who would distract other kids just for a laugh. I started middle school the same way, not expecting to change my views on school, especially since my partner in crime, Dominick, was in my new school and class. We would always be disruptive together and the teachers hated it because we would be eager for the class to join us.
Generally, I didnât like school, so I would do everything in my power to make school fun for myself. Once we received our math test back. Mr.Goorland stepped out of the room.
Dominick looks at me from across the room hinting that it was âShowTime! YO Kamaro,â he said loudly in the classroom.
âYO Dominick,â I replied loudly.
Then he said, âI lost my pencil. Can you toss me one by Mr. Goorlandâs desk?â
âSure,â I replied.
I took a pencil from Mr.Goorlandâs desk and tossed it across the room. As soon as I tossed it Mr.Goorland walked back into the room and it hit his thick very black pair of glasses off his face.
âWHO TOSSED THAT PENCIL FROM ACROSS THE ROOM! (lowercase)â Mr.Goorland yelled with red-faced anger. He notices everyone in the room looking at me. âOf course, it was you Kamaro. In all of my 25 years of teaching I never had such an uncaring student. Youâve been doing terrible in my class from day one, but itâs ok âcause I already graduated high school and college so Iâm not gonna suffer.â