English D323

You are currently viewing a revision titled "Peer Review on Rashan's Research paper", saved on December 14, 2015 at 11:13 pm by Sunny
Title
Peer Review on Rashan's Research paper
Content
  Opener: Discrimination is the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex. Thesis Statement: Through Social media and personal experiences, a person can come to the conclusion, is discrimination and prejudice the same thing, is it prominent in today’s culture, and how do people react to these issues. Subtopics: Discrimination and prejudice are viewed as the same thing to the average people as of today. Discrimination is prominent in today’s world. Examples of discrimination in acts of terrorism. Topic Sentences: Lacking a topic sentence in the first body paragraph. People may ask how can Discrimination be prominent in such a modernize melting pot of a country called the United States of America. When the topic of discrimination arises people tend to have multiple takes on this prominent issue. Transitional words: Rashan uses a good amount of transitional words throughout the essay. General Edits: There were some grammatical errors and some capitalization where it wasn’t needed and was repetitive by accident. Conclusion: Conclusion had a clear point but didn’t have any elaboration to leave the readers with a clear thought to process.
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December 15, 2015 at 4:13 am Sunny