[Jennifer Sears]

• For instructions on how to respond to the person who posts before you, see the Session 13 Follow Up Notes (Link below)
• This discussion board will close at the end of the day on Sunday, March 17.

https://openlab.citytech.cuny.edu/searseng1141e31/2024/03/14/eng-1141-session-13-march-13-follow-up-notes-and-homework/

 

[Jaqai Cherry]

Continued Story from FreeWrite:

 

I look at John waiting for him to sit down as I say ” You know I never wanted to kill him”. It was a dark night in the city I found myself in a situation where I was running from someone at full speed. A person who looks around my age wearing an all black outfit and a black ski mask that only show his eyes and not revealing the face pointing a weapon at me and demanding that I give him everything I have on me, as he gets closer and closer attempting to attack I dodge pass him which led to the situation I’m in right now. I kept running and running and once I saw a corner and turned towards it, it turned out to be a dead end. As the mysterious person catches up with me I realized that my back was against the wall and scared for my life, however I see a metal pipe next to the wall, so as the attacker begins to attempt another attack I dodge again and grabbed the pipe to defend myself.

At this point human instinct kicks in and my brain is telling me to fight or flight and since the attacker was keeping pace with me while I was running choosing the “flight” option was a risky one, so begins the fight. Sounds of metal clashing against each other as each of us tries to land a hit then “Wham” a direct hit on my arm and blood beings rushing down, then another attack on my leg, the attacker tries to deliver the final blow to my head but I block with the pipe and counter his attack connecting the heavy pipe to his head knocking him out. “Thud” he falls on the floor and I take a minute to calm down and get everything together, still bloody and bruised as I check for a pulse but I realize that I can’t feel one and that one hit killed him, I back up and start panicking since this is the first time this happened however later again taking a minute to calm down as I call up my friend John and asked to speak to him. Later he arrives as I look at John waiting for him to sit down as I say “You know I never wanted to kill him”.

[Msdelacruz]

Everything changed when Charles came back. It was as if someone hit a switch and miraculously my world was turned upside down. I remember waking up wondering if someone had placed a hex upon me. What was once a bright future encompassed by scouts, a formidable scholarly circle, along with adventures never dreamed of in my world, slipped away like the seasons end between September and August. The dread of the days grew near at a pace unfathomable. I’d find myself alone on days when I’d normally enjoy the comfort and the challenges inspired by my peers. Unfortunately for me, the reality of my immediate environment could never amount to the joys and fulfillment I experienced within a society of familiarity. My commonplace.

On good days, I’d wake up, take in the fresh air, and would go out for a walk in an attempt to enjoy the warm weather. On other days when I am feeling perplexed, I often find myself asking, “Was this deliberate? Was there some hidden plot to destroy my life at a moment’s notice?” So, one day I had enough and finally gained the confidence to seek clarity from my mom. I head towards my room door and exit to the kitchen when I am suddenly stopped by him. Had Charles read my mind? What was he even doing here? I had no idea that he was visiting today. He suddenly looks at me and with this curious look in his eyes, he says, “Hey, there. What are you up to today? I haven’t seen you in a while. Are you avoiding me?” Then suddenly, something came over me and I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

• This reply was modified 8 months, 1 week ago by Msdelacruz.

[Msdelacruz]

Jaquai Cherry’s story is told in the first person. My only question is, when you begin the intro you’re speaking to John and then you get into the details of what occurred, so when you’re explaining what happened are you talking to John or are you talking to the audience?

[Anallely Romero]

Detective inspector Cindy ducked to avoid the branches where was Phil? She expected him to be here when she arrived. Cindy was waiting for Phil for over ten minutes under the tallest tree on Columbus and 59th St. “Darn Phil. He’s always late.” She said while stomping with her right foot. She suddenly heard someone calling her name from a distance. “Cindy! Cindy!” She turned her head and saw Phil trip from his untied laces, as he was running towards her. “Ugh, typical Phil”, said Cindy. 

Phil arrived with his shirt unbuttoned, poorly tucked into his pants and with a loose tie. “I’m rea..I’m ready for the case. Wait… no. Cindy what is our case?” said Phil while trying to catch his breath. Cindy sighed “Danny, the groom that died at his wedding reception. It’s undetermined if the cause of death was from suicide or murder.” Phil, was quick it answer with confidence “It’s suicide. Danny was never happy with Jane. He wanted freedom.” Phil looked up to the sky, smiled and exhaled ” what a fortunate man.” Cindy looked at Phil in disbelief, not knowing if he was being serious or not until Phil said “There we have it. Case closed. Now, how about some breakfast? My treat.” 

• This reply was modified 8 months, 1 week ago by Anallely Romero.

[Anallely Romero]

@msdelacruz story is told in first person. I am intrigued to see how the relationship between Charles and the narrator will become?

[Naureen Asha]

We had 24 hours before the lockdown started in our city. Everything seemed to be paused in a second. Nobody knew what was next. What it means to be prepared. Everything seemed to be uncertain. All we knew was that in order to live, we had to act. However, no one could even agree on what that survival phase entailed.

My brother came to my room and rushed me and my sister to go to the grocery and pile up all our necessary items. We all started by preparing a list and gathering anything that looked helpful, from food to personal hygiene products. The store also had hundreds of other people. Everyone is attempting to prepare themselves for something they do not know about, kind of like in a competition. That is so vaguely funny!

[Naureen Asha]

Anallely’s story is told in the third person point of view. My question is why did Phill say in the end that the case is closed? Was he seriously saying what he explained the reasoning or there is an irony?

[ashley]

You get out of the subway at the stop near your house. You step out of the station, but that is when you realize the street you live on is no longer there. Instead there is a big factory with a gated fence where you can see all the workers that work outside. There was no red buildings no more, no more people, just a steamy factory with workers that dont even look like human.

Everything changed when my long lost sister came back to us. I knew I had a sibling but what I didn’t know was that I would ever meet them. It’s so funny how we met through a party and knew we were sisters that night. I went out on a Friday with my friends to go have some fun. When I got to the party there was blasting music, people dancing, people talking, laughter, and playing games. I told my friends “Ill be right back i’m going to get something to drink” and so I left to go to the kitchen. I seen this couple arguing right next to me while I was serving myself a drink. Then angrily the boyfriend walked out on her and the girlfriend started to cry. I started walking towards her.

• This reply was modified 8 months, 1 week ago by ashley.

[Jaqai Cherry]

@Msdelacruz to answer your question I am talking to john throughout the story based on the recent event that happened.

As for your story, your story is told in the first person. As for the question I know we were only limited to two paragraphs but I wanted to know how Charles plays a big role in this story, like what did Charles do that made it so shocking that he came back a second time.

[Filo]

The rumors started when Megan left. Nobody thought she had gone willingly. She was troubled, yes, but not to the extent of vanishing without a trace. Her sudden departure defied everything known about her. Megan was deeply connected to her family, especially her mom, Felicity. They were inseparable, sharing every decision and moment together. That’s what made her absence so alarming.

When her best friend Kiara visited Megan’s home, she found Felicity slumped on their worn, old pink couch, shacking and crying her eyes out. The fabric of the couch seemed to absorb her sorrow, its color mirroring the pallor of her pain. Dominick, her husband, stood beside her, his hand gently resting on her shoulder in a futile attempt to provide comfort. Maria, their younger daughter, hovered nearby, her eyes wide with worry, her small frame almost lost in the vastness of the room. The air was thick with the scent of hot mint chamomile, its steam rising in wisps from the glass table in front of Felicity. Despite their efforts, Felicity remained motionless, her gaze fixed on some unseen horizon, lost in the abyss of her despair. The father and daughter seemed completely lost, unsure of what had happened or what to do next. But in a brief glance between Kiara and Felicity, Kiara instantly grasped the truth of Megan’s disappearance.

@ashley Your story is told in the first person point of view. My question is: did your character know anything about this sibling (how she looked like, age), or she was just aware of her existence?

• This reply was modified 8 months, 1 week ago by Filo.

[Selinee Herrera]

<p dir=”ltr” style=”line-height: 2.4; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;”><span style=”font-size: 12pt; font-family: ‘Times New Roman’,serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;”>We had 24 hours before the lockdown started in our city. We stepped outside and people had different emotions, some with fear, packing, and others thinking it was all a lie. Still, everyone thought they were preparing for the worst-case scenario. At the supermarket, 3 feet stacks of toilet paper, food, and drinking water in the customer’s carts would have you wondering if people thought an apocalypse was coming. Frustrated people waiting in long lines wrapped around the empty bread and canned food isles. After spending 4 hours in the supermarket we finally left home with the few things we were able to grab hoping it had been enough for what was to come. </span></p>
 
<p dir=”ltr” style=”line-height: 2.4; margin-top: 0pt; margin-bottom: 0pt;”><span style=”font-size: 12pt; font-family: ‘Times New Roman’,serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;”>On the way home, we saw many wearing masks, gloves, face shields, and hazmat suits. “It is all in the air,” the morning news lady had said. Once we opened the apartment door, every channel talked about the same thing, an outbreak. We settled in for the night, made dinner, and sat on the couch holding each other’s hands, scared but hoping it all would pass soon. Darwin’s survival of the fittest may start to play out in the next few days as only the ones strong enough will survive. The next day a yellow haze covered what was once a blue sky. It was early spring, and the birds in front of our apartment window had gone silent. It was like the world was paralyzed and time had been stopped. On the internet and on TV people were dying by the thousands each day, worldwide. We didn’t know what it was, but the outbreak would soon touch our family and I will be the next one to go.   </span></p>

[Selinee Herrera]

We had 24 hours before the lockdown started in our city. We stepped outside and people had different emotions, some with fear, packing, and others thinking it was all a lie. Still, everyone thought they were preparing for the worst-case scenario. At the supermarket, 3 feet stacks of toilet paper, food, and drinking water in the customer’s carts would have you wondering if people thought an apocalypse was coming. Frustrated people waiting in long lines wrapped around the empty bread and canned food isles. After spending 4 hours in the supermarket we finally left home with the few things we were able to grab hoping it had been enough for what was to come.

On the way home, we saw many wearing masks, gloves, face shields, and hazmat suits. “It is all in the air,” the morning news lady had said. Once we opened the apartment door, every channel talked about the same thing, an outbreak. We settled in for the night, made dinner, and sat on the couch holding each other’s hands, scared but hoping it all would pass soon. Darwin’s survival of the fittest may start to play out in the next few days as only the ones strong enough will survive. The next day a yellow haze covered what was once a blue sky. It was early spring, and the birds in front of our apartment window had gone silent. It was like the world was paralyzed and time had been stopped. On the internet and on TV people were dying by the thousands each day, worldwide. We didn’t know what it was, but the outbreak would soon touch our family and I will be the next one to go.

Note: I apologize for the previous post as something happened with the format and it changed.

[Selinee Herrera]

@Filo, your story is being told through a distant third-person point of view. As the narrator appears not to be a character in the story and makes use of “She, her, he, and they”. My question to you is What did Felicity and Kiara know that made Kiara understand Megan’s disappearance by looking at each other? `

[Angelica Tellez]

Back when I used to babysit my great granddaughter when her mom was working, she was just learning how to walk. She would use the glass topped coffee table as a balance beam for her small feet. I was on the couch watching my novelas when what seemed like slow motion, Angelica was tripping over herself and falling directly onto the corner of that table.

Before I could even think, I scooped my baby up and ran to the bathroom. Getting a better look at her, there was a huge gash on her eyebrow that filled her little face with blood. My heart is pounding out of my chest, desperately trying to wash her face with water. I put a towel on her face and waited for an eternity for the blood to clot. I’m trying my best to calm her down but I feel dizzier by the second. I rush to the couch and hold on the my baby for dear life. The light is slowly fading as the echo of the baby fills my head.