Black men in The United States want to have white wives, or at least white looking wives, as Ifemelu said in her blog “Many successful American black men have white wives.”(Adichie 265) Maybe that’s the whole point, to be successful, to get somewhere in life. If they have whit wives or white looking wives, who can at least pass as a white female would be the reason of being more successful and black men would be more valued more in the society. They will be respected by cops, their children could attend good schools and not be harassed because of being black and would be safe. No one would degrade them or their children because they have a solid base to work with. Black women are always kept on the down low because they’re not considered pretty enough to be with in the public. Women look up to Barack Obama because he brought hope to these women to be considered pretty for whom they are. “He broke the mold!” Ifemelu mentioned (Adichie 265) “He married one of their own. He knows what the world does seem to know: that dark black women totally rock.” If black men only want to marry white women, what will happen to their own kind? Who will they get married to? Black men seem to be so focused on being successful, being out there and not being degraded, they become selfish and stop caring about their own society. But rather move on and step along with a different one, so they can escape from their the background they came from. Barack Obama saw differently, he knew he could make a difference by just marrying his own, to marry within the community/ society. To show people women are beautiful no matter what color they are, what shape they have, looks matter but brains matter more. To him education matters more, manners mattered more and that’s why so many black women like Obama. He showed that black men can be successful with black women standing by their side. Media is a source where it shown the importance of white women in America over black women. Black women are never the main character in any shows or movies. They’re always the negative character and are hidden and are always given the lowest roles to be acting in. All of this is an explanation of “Age, Race, Class and Sex: Women Redefining Difference.” By Audrie Lorde. “Somewhere, on the edge of consciousness, there is what I call a mythical norm… In America, this norm is usually defined as a white, thin, male, young, heterosexual, Christian, and financially secured.” (Lorde 116) This is what all these black men are trying to do. They’re trying to follow the norm, for the most part. To have a secure and successful future for themselves and their kids. I actually belong from Pakistan and people always mistake me as a Spanish or a Russian person. It doesn’t always go in a negative way. I am spoken Spanish to and am expected to reply in the same language. But I can’t close my eyes and say, yes I am Spanish or Russian or whatever people think I am just to fit in the norm and the society.