7 Point Peer Review on Ali Nadir

1. Opener- Decent opener. Doesn’t really catch the attention of the reader. Should be either a question or a quote from someone.
2. Thesis- Clearly stated thesis with all three sub-topics.
3. Paragraphs- The first two sub-topics were clear, but the third wasn’t until near half the paragraph.
4. Transitional words/phrases- Good transitions on the first two sub-topics. The third sub-topic and paragraph needs to be re-written.
5. References (quotes) & citation (MLA)- Not enough quotes. Only counted three and there should be nine or ten (if opener is a quote). There needs to be a page number or paragraph number after each quote. The citations are in MLA format.
6. Grammar & Conventions- Needs to be worked on. More of the conventions than the grammar.
7. Conclusion- The restatement of the thesis should be at the beginning of the conclusion. The leading out sentence was good.