“I don’t know why you’re in music class. You can’t even play a single instrument correctly.”
At eleven, I had no comprehension of just how much words could shape me even if they were coming from a role model. This made me feel like I was so inferior and did not belong in that class. It was as if it were a critique of everything I could do, not just play an instrument properly. I remember the awful feeling of wanting to disappear so that no one else would get any ideas about me. I was afraid that if I tried to raise my hand after that day, it would only lead to further embarrassment. It created doubt in my resolve to step outside of my comfort zone in any area of life.
I started to become more reclusive, quieter, and reluctant to try playing the instruments at all. Every time we were asked to perform, I would sit in the back and observe the other students while a knot of nervousness knotted in my gut. I would tremble and look away from the teacher, not wanting to hear another embarrassing remark. It was more than just the music now, that one instance had left me wondering if I was creative at all. I started to question if I should even try.
Even though it was unpleasant, that event eventually marked a turning point in my career as a musician. I decided to utilize the criticism as motivation to do better rather than letting it get to me. I began to practice more regularly, setting aside time every day to become proficient at the instruments and convince myself that I could. Over time, I discovered that failures are a normal part of progress and that patience leads to growth rather than perfection. In addition, I made new friends and mentors who inspired me to keep going and helped me regain my confidence. When I go back, I can see how much I’ve changed not just in terms of my musical ability, but also in terms of my tenacity and willpower. I play with more confidence today because I understand that every obstacle, I overcome will only make me stronger.
It’s nice to hear that you hadn’t given up on bettering yourself as a musician. It’s tough being told that you couldn’t do something correctly. You faced those words head on and it has paid off. You are strong minded and I hope you will continue to have that kind of mindset with whatever hurdle life throws your way.
VERY GOOD HERE! I like the quote you chose. Good writerly choice. I really feel for you sitting in that music class.
Now if you choose to continue with this – and it’s really a very good beginning! – It could be the seed of a larger story on education narrative. NOW you need a few CSD concrete specific details are needed: Eleven and WHAT grade? What instrument were you playing? WHAT class — was this BAND class? WHO was this teacher who said this to you?
I love this phrase: “a knot of nervousness knotted in my gut.” [but can you choose a different word so you don’t have two knots right after another?]
You talk about being creative – what were your passions and what other subjects/hobbies/passions were you feeling doubtful of after this incident? DETAILS needed.
FOCUS for this story if you build it out:
Let’s try to figure out what is the main transformative event here. In a single sentence what could this be about? Is this about being put down in music class by MR. MS. TEACHERNAME that made you doubt your creativity (is this focused on creative passions—that’s ok it doesn’t have to be about scholarly or academic subjects). About your musical abilities? IF this is true than is being a musician an important part of your identity? OR IS this about how the music class and being a musician taught you to gain confidence in other aspects of your educational life?
What could be the next events that would move your story forward?
Another event: Concert — Can you describe more about that concert and feeling “knot of nervousness”. Did you only pretend to blow the trumpet, move the bow (WHAT INSTRUMENT)…Do you remember hearing everyone ‘s musical sounds and your own quiet non-existence in this band?
Another event: Turning point – STEPS you took to better yourself. You write”practice more regularly, setting aside time every day…” SHOW me your practice sessions in the studio room repeating the same line of music over and over again.
ANOTHER event – New friends and mentors – SHOW me the social growth and relationships that helped you in that musical band/symphony/ WHAT GROUP?
What could be the culminating event that shows you have now got confidence? Would it be a final end of year concert? Or the graduation band performance?
OK you get the picture…I need you to SHOW me!