Happily Ever After?

            Love, that four letter word that seems to be the hardest thing to achieve but at the same time the answer to all our problems. Everyone wants love, that special someone to ride off into the sunset with or to save them from the evil dragon and be the hero. People are getting these ideas of a certain kind of love from how it is presented in movies such as Disney movies like Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Cinderella etc… The views of love shown in these movies can give someone unrealistic expectations about love and relationships. They may see Sleeping Beauty getting awakened from her nap with a kiss from a handsome prince and want that too. It could be anything that attracts that person. After one has watched and has decided that’s the love they want, they may wait forever for their prince charming. What if prince charming never comes in the way they want? Or if their Prince Charming ever comes at all? The love that is wanted may not be the love one gets. Love has its pros and cons but it does not come easy. Movies are ruining the way people view love, the kind of love they want and how they want it.

For starters in these Disney films they show ways of love that are very unrealistic. In almost every fairytale the women is doing everything she can to land her Prince Charming. That is the female’s main focus throughout the film. These films are telling us that in order for a woman to be happy she must find her prince. This can lead to a woman believing the only way to achieve true happiness is by having a man in her life. In the article, “How Disney ruined me for the real world” by Saba Khalid explains a number of ways in which Disney movies ruined her for the real world. One of those ways is, “The only reason Disney princesses breathe, eat, swim, sing, grow their hair, wear ridiculous clothing and shoes, is so that they will one day find themselves a good-looking prince. And once they do, all their problems in life are solved. That means if you don’t find a prince, or if yours happens to be on the ugly or on the less charming side, you’ll still be struggling all your life” (Khalid, 1) This is very true and is a terrible message to tell people. If a woman doesn’t find her prince she’s basically doomed.

These Disney films were not originally made out to be this way in the first place. The original stories are very different from the fairytales we know today. The stories that are based on the ones we know now were actually intended to warn children about the tough road ahead. These movies are based on those stories but were completely changed and made them into these happy fairytales that we know today. These movies that we have today display an unrealistic view of love. In the article by “How Walt Disney Ruined Our Love Lives” by Robert Epstein explains the unrealistic expectations these films give us about love and what these movies are actually based on that are completely different than the ones we know today. “Disney, you see, contributed to the failure of many marriages around the world. He did this by glamorizing and magnifying fairy tales that cause us — women, especially — to have unrealistic expectations about how successful romantic relationships are made and maintained” (Epstein, 1) This statement explains how these fairytales have given people an unrealistic view on love and how it works.

The after story of these fairytales never seem to be shown. We know it says they live happily ever after but is that it? What happens after that happily ever after? No one really know because no one is willing to tell it because it would ruin the idea of the story ending happily ever after. Also how the women are usually the ones taking all the risks in order to get Prince Charming while the male just sits around being rich, handsome and charming.

Work Citied/Annonated Bibliography

Khalid, Saba. “How Disney ruined me for the real world”. The Express Tribune with the International New York Times. 2 October 2012.

 

Various ways of what Disney films have taught us and how unrealistic it is. Some ways include the women must find a prince in order to be happy and have a fulfilling life and how old women and all things ugly are seen as bad or evil. I manly focused on how unrealistic the lessons learned from this article is. How can one follow these lessons learned from Disney despite how unrealistic they are.

 

Epstein, Robert. “How Walt Disney Ruined Our Lives”. Brandeis Magazine. Summer 2014.

 

The fairytales we know today are based on other stories that were taken and remade into something completely different. The true fairytales are no fairtytales at all they were actually intended to help girl through the tough road that lies ahead. Disney had other ideas when these stories were taken and turned into something else.

 

Kim, Jen. “What happens after happily ever after? Psychology Today. 22 February 2010.

No one really ever wonders what happens after they fall in love, get married and live happily ever after. This article shows images and share stories of what a photographer did as to what happened after their happily ever afters. Also shows how all the men in the movies have the same goal to be handsome, rich and charming while the females have way more going on.

Chapter 7

1. Describe how each of the five stages of the helping process can aid in the well-being of clients.

The five stages of the helping process include components of the problem-solving process such as identifying the problem, setting goals to resolve the problem and determining and applying strategies designed to help the client reach those goals. The stages are preparation, the client arrives, exploring the problem, intervention strategies and termination. Preparation includes the physical setting of a human service worker and how the client may take it. Paperwork on clients is important but some clients might not want the worker writing while they are talking. When the client arrives there needs to be respect and acceptance of a client. Client should be approached with a smile, a handshake and a introduction. Some clients can’t wait to tell the worker about their problems but others won’t and there are ways to do that. Exploring the problem which is when the problems the client is having is discussed with the professional. When the problems are identified you can move on to the next stage which Intervention Strategies which is setting goals to resolve the problems. Termination is when the relationship between client and professional may end and that can happen in several ways. A positive way is when both participants are satisfied.

2. Describe how an assessment of the client’s history can aid in the well-being/happiness.

The assessment of the client’s history can aid in the well-being/happiness because it can give the human service professional a better understanding on their client to know their history.

3. Describe the special attitudes, skills, and values that the human service professional need for each of the five stages of helping in order to successfully aid in the well-being of clients.

Some skills the professional must know is the message the client is giving you whether its nonverbal or verbal messages. Certain cues can show what a client might be saying non verbally. Responsive listening and active listening describe the behaviors of helpers as they attend to both the verbal and the nonverbal communication of the client. Attending behavior is another way to let the client know the heeler is listening, to encourage the client to talk about and examine issues, problems or concerns. This behavior can include eye contact, vocal qualities, verbal tracking and body language.

4. Describe the SOLAR and how can it promote well-being between the client and human service workers relationship.

Each letter in the acronym SOLER stands for something and makes it easy to remember. Face the client Squarely, adopt and Open posture, Lean toward the other person, Maintaian good Eye contact, and try to be relatively Relaxed. These are guiedines that the professional can use to better help their clients.

5. Describe the various body language message clients’ express. Include those that indicate less that well-being.

The various body language messages can all mean different things, for example leaning forward in a chair is interest in what is being discussed between client and professional.

6. Describe how the human service professional might use the body language message of a client to promote the well-being of a client in session.

The human service worker can sure the body language of a client to promote well-being because they can relate certain positions to meaning of their well-being and if they were interested in what was being discussed in the session.

7.Describe how group therapy can promote the well-being of a client.

Group therapy can be used to promote the well-being of a client because they are able to interact with others who maybe have the same problems they have and can discuss with others and get more feedback.

8. Describe how the humans service worker can approach the silent client to aid their needs towards well-being.

The human service worker can approach the silent client by reading their body language and using what they mean to help the well-being of the client.

9. Describe how the human service worker can approach the overly demanding client in order to aid their needs in the well-being.

The human service worker can approach the overly demeaning client in order to aid their needs by setting reasonable limits to decrease the clients’ dependence, limiting client-helper contact to working hours and examine the helpers own needs to be needed. The helper can also encourage the demanding behavior of a client.

10.  The unmotivated worker can be approached by explaining certain things to client such as confidentiality, the helper can explain the process to the client.

11. A crisis-intervention can aid in the well-being of the client because it is a helping process that occurs at a much faster pace than other helping and incorporates many of the helping roles and skills. These occur when their is an emergency such as suicide threats or attempts, the discovery of an unwanted pregnancy, abandonment, or natural disasters. The crisis has to be identified in order to know what the problem is and a resolution of the crisis can be made.

12. Resolution Focused Brief Treatment can aid in the well-being of a client is because it is based upon client strengths with a focus on the present and future. This can help improve their lives and begin to have goals.

Class notes 11/18

Research Proposal Presentations

The goal of today was to get feedback on your proposal.

The key of the presentation was to explain your topic, what specifically will you be studying, what is the relevance of your topic to you and others, show the research you found and answer questions.

Tinika:

Her topic had to do with how certain music can affect teenagers. In her research she found more negative research such as how violent music affects teenagers. She related to her own relationship with music and how much she loves it.

Her topic needs to be narrowed down to the type of music and if she wants to focus on the positive or negative impact music has on teenagers.

Mirna:

Her topic is positive psychology and how people arent assisted in achieving happiness. She talked about how doctors just give their patients pills instead of focusing on how to improve their happiness. She also discusses also how doctors misdiagnosis patients. She also brought up a interesting point of how doctors only ask two questions and tell if you are depressed or not and if you are your are just given medicine. She related her topic to her little cousin and how he deals with the same thing. She discussed a lot of things in one topic but it was able to be narrowed down to “Overuse and mistreatment of medicine by doctors”

Some comments were how doctors may have a different definition of happiness and what it takes to achieve it

Arlene:

Her topic is the affect an incarcerated parent has on the well-being of a child. She wants to focus on how it affects a child’s education. There are negative and positive to the topic but she hopes to focus on finding positive research since parents are incarcerated maybe it will motivate the child.  She also discusses how it affects a child overall, such as mental issues, PTSD, anger issues etc. which can affect their education. A question was brought up about the age group and she decided to choose children in elementary school.

Greys:

Topic is the positive affects of technology on kids. Research shows it improves the way of thinking and brain development. After doing research she believes technology has a positive affect.

During Greys presentation Professor Belli asked us all to write this down:

*THE PART OF THIS RESEARCH PAPER IS NOT TO AGREE OR DISAGREE, IT IS NOT TO CHOOSE SIDES AND IT IS NOT SIMPLY TO STATE POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE.

Back to Greys presentation she was asked what specific technology she was going to use and the specific age group. She wants to focus on video but needs to narrow it down to the age group.

Lucy:

Topic is how happiness is found more in third world countries then in developed countries. Her research compares things such as freedom and economy. She found a article that shows the Top 10 countries that are the happiest as well. She wants to also compare the lifestyles in different countries such as comparing New York to India. She was given a lot of comments of narrowing down her topic. She needs to narrow down which countries and lifestyles because it sounds as if she wants to research all of it which can be too much. Also to looking at different countries there are other factors such as religion, culture and race. She just needs to narrow down her topic more to specifics.

Jack:

Topic is if strict parents/Tiger parents have a good impact on a child’s education and success later in life or if its just a stereotype. Strict parents in Chinese culture are known as tiger parents. It was said that he needs to inform his readers abut what the Chinese conception of happiness is. During the questioning Professor Belli brought of the question, What information does my reader have to know? The reader needs to know exactly what your talking about in order to understand it. Jack needs to explain the Chinese culture conception of happiness in order to better understand his topic.

Jocelyn:

Topic is how the absence of a parent can affect the life of a child. Research showed fathers have a bigger impact on the child. A child’s personality is something that can be affected by the absence of a parent. She knows she wants to focus on the father and on abandonment.

Kelsey:

Topic is well-being on children in foster care. These children deal with things such as anxiety, stress and feelings of confusion. There is a lot of negative aspects on foster care. She needs to narrow down what kind of foster care she will be focusing on and the age of the children. She should discuss foster care more and how the system works so the reader can know more about it.

*Become and expert on the big picture of your topic.

Marie:

Topic is how technology affects your emotions, specifically social networking. She wasn’t sure on the type of technology she was focusing on, first she discussed social networking but then brought up apps. She needs to narrow down her topic to the technology being used and the specific people. She finally said the topic she really wants to focus on which is Why is it so important to feel we need all these forms of technology? 

REMINDERS:

Meetings with Professor Belli are coming up.

THURSDAY: Peer review on as well as discussing annotations/citations and how to incorporate sources as well as discussing plagiarism. ESSAY #2 IS DUE.

*Key is to make connections among your various points. Biggest grade is how well you are proving your point and the structure.

Openlab is looking for a student blogger. It starts next semester and it is a paid position. Applications are due December 1st.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Second draft proposal

I decided to change my topic because I felt I wouldn’t be able to write a lot about it. I decided to choose the topic of how the media and technology affects love. Love is something everyone wants. It seems as if life isn’t complete with finding that special someone. What about love is so special? What makes everyone want it so badly? Could it be the role media plays in it? Love is in almost every movie, it seems it’s not a movie without romance. When one does not find love that can affect ones happiness and wellbeing. In todays society and everything that is shown to us it’s all about love and finding that special someone. People look at couples and say “I want that!” but in reality don’t really know what that is. Not having it can make someone sad and hurt because of it. I want to research the affect the media and technology has on love and how it can affect someones happiness and wellbeing.

http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationship/features/25275-distorting-love

Jake and Melissa Kircher. “Does media distort love? A look at our corrupting views of romance, relationships and sexuality”. Relevant. Web. 12 April 2011.

This site brought be a view on how social media and technology affects ones views on love. This site gave me the idea to see how the role it has on people and how it can affect their wellbeing. It explains how the media shows us that love conquers all and that it will make you happy and solve all your problems. Also how showing this certain kind of love in media can affect the way people begin to find love and how they look for it because it is seen a certain way.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tyler-curry/how-social-media-are-ruining-your-love-life_b_4317987.html

Tyler Curry. “How Social Media Are Ruining Your Love Life”. The Blog. Web. 26 November 2013.

This website shows views on social media is ruining ones love life. Nowadays people fall in love online or even plane a date that way. It basically says when you fall in love with him you have to fall in love with Facebook or instagram as well. When you go on a date nowadays you have to look them up online and see who they are and see their social media. It can affect our dating life. These websites helped me get a better understand of different way social media and technology can affect love.

Research Project Proposal:

When I first starting to think about what my topic was going to be it was difficult to pick something. I started to think about what do people talk about nowadays that makes them happy or unhappy. Then I thought about how age affects ones happiness. I thought of this because lately a lot of people around me have been complaining about their age and the fear of getting old. These people usually say the same thing “I’m getting old” or “Do I look old?” I’m sure a lot of people my age have heard the famous, “I wish I was your age”. So I researched how age affects happiness and kept reading articles with something in common which is The U-bend of life. The U is supposed to represent the ups and downs one goes through with age. It shows how people start out happy then things go downhill in youth to middle age then when one starts to move towards old age they begin to finally achieve happiness.  After reading this article it made me really think about it because although people do fear getting old can ones age really affect their happiness? This topic really is very interesting to me and I look forward to finding out more about it.

http://www.economist.com/node/17722567

This site above explains the U-bend of life with age. I ran into other articles with the same concept but this one I stayed on more than the others and I felt explained what the U-bend of life actually was.

Happiness through apps.

I was interested in trying the apps. I was curious to how it worked and if it even helped at all. So I downloaded the app “Mappiness”. When I first got it it asked me to answer some questions about my personal happiness and also my money and my income. I didn’t expect to be asked about money, so that took me off guard. When I was finally done they asked me questions based on how happy, relaxed and awake I was on a scale from 1-10. Then I was asked what I was doing and to check off all that apply and also where I was. That was about it. I get a update everyday from the app telling me to do the same thing. After a couple of days I looked at it and noticed it starts to create a chart based on my happiness. The app said I was most happy when I was home and indoors, which is very true. To be fair the times when I was notified to update my happiness I was home and I was recently sick, so that could have something to do with it. The more I use the app I’m sure the more I will find out. So far the app is telling me things I already know, so it’s helpful to see my happiness being tracked but at the same time I already know what they are telling me so far. Maybe after a while it will tell me things I don’t know, after all I did just start the app.

My Happy Place.

When I walk into this place my problems seem to disappear. I become happy and ready to explore. The place that makes me feel this way is Forever 21, specifically the one in Times Square. I love this specific Forever 21 out of all the other ones the most is because it has four floors. Other stores have one or two floors but this one has FOUR. The main reason this place brings me joy because since getting a job I am able to buy things on my own, I no longer need to ask anymore. This play always gave me joy because now knowing that I am able to buy what I want, makes this place my favorite place. I loved the store before my job, but going to a store without money is torture. Having to look at all the beauty and knowing you can’t buy it hurts. So now when I come here I have the option of buying something if I want to.

So the first floor is the kind of preppy clothing. I’ve noticed every time I go with someone they never want to look in the first floor, I’ve never understood that. I think it’s best to look on every floor, you’ll never what you might find despite which floor. I like to give every floor a chance. The thing about this store, it get’s better with each floor. So the second floor is split up in different sections based on the types of clothes. There’s the pajamas and comfortable clothing, the bags, the working clothes, the lingerie, jewelry and then one section for everyday wear. I love the fact that they do this because it’s allowing so much just on one floor and there’s so much different stuff to look at.

The third floor is also divided into section based on clothes. There’s the clothes for guys, the kids, jeans, plus size, and night out clothing. One would be surprised, there are some nice stuff in the boys section if you actually look. I really like just looking in the boys section because there stuff is more comfortable. I like to feel comfortable in my clothing and nowadays everything for girls is cut short, which I hate. Even sweaters, something meant to keep us warm is cut. I really hope that trend stops because it’s not cute, not even in the summer. I love the fact that there is a plus size section, I love getting my jeans from there because sometimes the regular jeans don’t fit me. This is the only Forever 21 I’ve been to with a plus size section. It’s good because not everyone fits the regular clothing and it’s good to have one there.

Finally the last floor, where I usually always find what I’m looking for or just find the best stuff. The last floor is more urban and cool. There’s also gym clothes and more bags and shoes done there. Also the clothing that is on sale is down there as well and if you look hard enough you will find something you like in that big section.

So there it is, my favorite place. From the feeling of independence this place gives me to the four floors of heaven, this place will forever bring me happiness. I could be in the worst mood on my way to this place but once I step foot in here I am a happy person.

Happiness and Technology

Before looking at these three websites based on happiness I’ve never realized before the role that technology plays in ones happiness. I do believe technology brings happiness to people, depending on how your using it. If your texting a friend, going on social media, taking pictures, using an app or playing a game, that can definitely increase ones happiness. After looking at these sites I honestly thinks it’s a good idea to relate happiness to technology. People are very busy and to be able to go on their phone, which are permanently attached to peoples hand anyway, and bring some happiness their way.

The first link was to a website called Happier. This website offers courses that offer daily lessons that help one learn tips and tricks that are scientifically proven to help focus on what makes someone happier. It offers many things such as ridiculously affordable the courses are, and even some are free. Theres even a on-the-go option where each episode can be completed in under 15 minutes on the web or on a phone. This website basically gives the steps on how to become a better you and courses or episodes can be taken to get you there.

The next link was to a website called Happify. This website is different in the way that everything is based on science. They offer activities and games that help you to train the brain and build skills for lasting happiness. This website helps one reach their goals by recommending daily activities so we can be more excited about our future. Just like the previous website it allows to be used on the phone or a computer. There’s even evidence of how happiness is increased after joining happify.

Finally the last link showed the average happiness for twitter. It shows when happiness was at it’s highest on holidays. This was very interesting to look at, Christmas Day is the highest in happiness, not surprising but interesting to know. All these websites of course have in common, HAPPINESS. I had no idea there were these websites to help people increase their happiness. If it works for someone and has a positive impact then great, go for it. I definitely do think it’s interesting and should be tried. The websites draws me in, it made me want to join, all the pictures and personal stories was one of the main reasons of wanting to join. If it can work for someone else, it can work for me too was a thought as going through the website. Everyone wants happiness so I’m sure others are willing to try.

Response to film/parodies “The Secret”

This week we watched a film called “The Secret” and two parodies based on the film. The original film, “The Secret” was about the law of attraction. To sum it up it’s basically about how you become what you think about most. One attracts the things in their life whether they are good or bad. You become what you attract, if your happy good things will happen, if your angry or upset bad things will happen. Whatever someone is thinking or feeling today is planning their future. I don’t believe this to be true, but honestly when I watched the film I wanted it to be true. I wanted it to be true because it sounded so easy and simple. Think good thoughts and you will be happy. But no matter how good it sounds it’s not realistic. How can one think good thoughts all the time and just because we are putting good thoughts out there does not mean we are attracting those good things, whatever they may be. This film basically states if we think it we can have it.

We watched two parodies based on the film, the first was a SNL skit about an interview on the Oprah Winfrey show with Rhonda Bryne as the guest and someone who believes they have been helped by “The Secret”. First off everyone is being made fun of in this skit. Oprah is someone who can what she wants in the blink of an eye and in the skit she says how she thought of herself eating something in a hot air ballon and then she made a call and it happened and says how it was her thinking it that made it happen. Constantly in the skit the woman playing Oprah says “The Secret” really loud and every time she does everyone claps. It shows how “The Secret” was all hype and not really something that works.

The last parody we watched was 24 calamity parody about “The Secret”. In this parody they are making fun of the actual people in the original film. They show how the people were talking and doing things a certain way to make it seem like what they were saying is true. The people in the parody pretend as if they know what they’re talking about by the way their talking but it doesn’t make any sense at all. This parody even brings to life how in the original video they had quotes flashing and being whispered because they are important and in the parody they make fun of it and shows how that just tries to make it sound important or make it seem like it’s true because of that. Overall I believe the parodies to be on point and I do not believe “The Secret” to be true.

Chapter 4

1. Describe the three models of service delivery in terms of how each impact well-being to either individuals, families and or communities.

a. Medical is based on an orientation developed by the medical profession; it assumes that mental disorders are diseases or illnesses that impair an individual’s ability to function.

b. Public Health focuses on groups in the population who may be identified by geography or specific characteristics. This model views mental disorders as the result of malfunctions or pressures created by the environment or society.

c. Human Services is concerned with the interaction between the individual and the environment and a need for the balance between the two. This model focuses on the interpersonal and environmental conflicts that may result from the problem (mental disorder).

2. Describe how Phillippe Pinel impacted the well-being of those with mental illness.

Phillippe Pinel impacted the well-being of those with metal illness because he began to campaign to secure a new status for persons with mental illness as people suffering from disease rather than being possessed by demons or manifesting the consequences of sin. Also that these people required medical care rather than prosecution or punishment. He was able to develop his famous “moral method” for treating mental illness. This method assumes that mental illness is due to some imbalance in the patient, which the physician can treat and rectify.

3. Describe how psychodynamic model promoted the well-being of the human service profession.

The psychodynamic model promotes the well-being of the human service profession because the clients or patients share all thoughts with the therapist. The thoughts are interpreted by the therapist and the nature of their repressions and the influence of these repressions on their present problems is explained to the patients.

4. Describe how medications promoted the well-being of those with mental illnesses.

Medications promoted the well-being of those with metal illness because it allowed treatment for those with metal disorders. Antipsychotic drugs are effective in managing psychotic disorders such as manic and depressive psychosis, schizophrenia, and schizoaffective disorder. These do not cure but they are able to help control certain psychotic behaviors such as suspiciousness, hallucinations and impulsiveness. Antidepressant drugs relieve depression. Antianxiety drugs relives anxiety, fear, or tension.

5. Describe how electroshock treatment can promote the well-being of a person with severe depression, catatonic states.

Electroschock treatment can promote the well-being of a person with severe depression and catatonic states because it was effective with depressed individuals. Problems behaviors diminished after several weeks of treatments.

6. Describe how the “strengths based” model approach promotes the well-being of clients/society.

The “strength based” model approach promotes the well-being of clients/society because the helper encourages the client to think about past problems or situations that were resolved effectively. This approach emphasizes strengths, resources, coping, possibilities, and resilience.