Virtues from Motherhood: Parents aren’t perfect

A few weeks ago, in one of my psychology classes the professor had us fill out this survey of icebreaker questions. One of those questions was “who are your heroes?” and I couldn’t help but remember answering this question in third or fourth grade and naming my parents or grandparents. That still may be the case for some of us today, but for different reasons, because as a kid we thought our parents had all the answers, they had life figured out. As we’ve aged though I think some, if not all, of us have figured out that are parents aren’t perfect because they’re human too.

Growing up I thought my parents were a well-oiled machine, my dad went to work and my mom stayed home and took care of us and there was always a hot meal and a clean house to come home to. My mom always had a solution to every problem and nothing seemed too big to tackle, and if it was I never knew about it. After becoming a parent myself, I’ve learned that this skill is more about being able to conceal chaos rather than there being none at all. Still though, being able to remain cool calm and collected no matter what was going on is a skill, and it made my childhood carefree and unperturbed.

Now an adult myself, I’ve come to realize that my parents are people too, they have their bad days and weak moments just like I do. Some days this makes me sad, to realize that the “perfection illusion” from childhood is gone but mostly it makes me feel better about myself and the days where I’m just not 100%. It’s okay to have an off day, it doesn’t mean everything falls apart; it just means you work a little harder tomorrow.

I wish I had that skill to the degree my mom possesses but I don’t, still I try and keep it altogether for Ava and I think I do a pretty good job. As I get older I learn more and more it’s about all the little pieces coming together, not a continuous flow of perfection and most of all that not every day will be perfect, and that’s okay too. The sun will still rise tomorrow.

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