Monthly Archives: May 2018

Life as a tech student

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Hey guys! Gen here, and today I’d like to show you,y daily routine. Now I know that you all know me by name but I feel as if that’s all you know me as, Gen the writer. But today, I’d like to show you behind the scenes and how my life usually plays out for example, going to classes. I’m a communications design student so most of my classes reside on the 11th floor in the Pearl building, it’s an interesting experience being exposed to so many creative thinkers and colors.

Other than school, I use my time to work with a startup company known as O.T.O. This is a company in the making, in which, the employees within the company Overcome The Odds (O.T.O), whether it’s poverty or academics, it can be so many things. We are underdogs rooting our way to the top. This company is more than just a business thing, it’s also a family. We’ve grown and achieved things together. In this company we remain humble to our origins. We do this by partaking in a monthly food and clothing donation to the less fortunate. The company itself is a production company which has reality shows as well as a cartoon illustrated series, “The Mr.TurnUp Show”, and as for the reality shows we call it “ Reel Talks.“ In a small amount of time the company has increased in size, and we continue to look for amazing talent in efforts to help us make a difference here in New York. Yes when I say talent, I mean you COMD students, and to you as well, actors!

I write today to tell you about my daily life, and to provide you with an amazing chance to be part of something great, whether you just want experience or wish to become one with the company as a worker, it’s your choice,. Our doors are open to anyone looking to put the work in. By no means is this an advertising blog but an honest one. Just a piece of advice that will benefit anyone who reads this in the long run because we all know that most jobs aren’t accepting of people if they lack experience. So if you need experience, well you found the right place!

Logo of Overcoming The Odds

 

Winning an Award at The 2018 Literary Arts Festival

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Girl holding certificate and SmilingOn April 12th, 2018 I received an email from Professor Lucas Kwong informing me that I won First Place in the Michele Forsten Advocacy Category for my paper “The Price of Gentrification: Who Pays?” I was ecstatic when I read the news that my paper had been chosen, and that I was going to receive an award. Immediately I called my loved ones and my mentors to tell them about this major accomplishment in my life. Honestly, I didn’t know what to do with myself because this paper “The Price Of Gentrification: Who Pays?” caused a lot of controversy in my life. What I mean by this is that I had a lot of people tell me that discussing this topic was going to cause too much uproar. People also told me that my words were too harsh, and that I should try and soften my words so the message I was trying to convey wouldn’t offend people. For weeks I faced backlash from various people who were not only against my views, but who also were against me speaking out on this topic. However, I didn’t let these people stop me from saying what I had to say, and because I spoke my truth I was awarded an honor for a paper that I wrote while being nearly on the brink of tears.

This paper was a work of art that came from the depths of my soul. As I typed the words, I allowed myself to express my pain in the only way I knew how, with hopes that people who were and still are experiencing the same thing as me,  could gain some comfort. I understood that I could potentially offend many people, and possibly make some people uncomfortable, but it was a risk I was willing to take. So I went up against many people, and in the end it was all worth it when I walked on to the stage in the Atrium Amphitheatre and accepted my award in front of people like my Mother , Father Professor Jospeh Jeyaraj, Professor Jason Ellis, and The Buzz’s own Professor Jill Belli.

In that moment I felt as though my hard work paid off, and I was grateful for those people who supported me through the process of writing about the current struggle I was going through with seeing how the neighborhood I once knew had drastically changed.In the end I realized that in life you will face many obstacles when it comes to speaking about topics that may cause the majority to cringe. However, the best part about writing this piece on gentrification was not only the award, but the positive feedback I received from people who said they were going through the same thing. After reading my piece many people shared with me how difficult the process of gentrification has been for them, and many of them were glad to hear my side of the story. 

Winning this award at The Literary Arts Festival was a blessing for me because it showed me that my words resonated deeply with other people. People heard and they understood me and to me that was valuable recognition.

Now that I have told you about the struggle I faced to tell my story, and how my struggle turned into triumph, tell me your story.

Have you ever experienced a struggle that was difficult to overcome, but in the end everything worked out in your favor? If so, let me know in the comment box below.

What’s your “friend language”?

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women laughing while at spa

Photo Retrieved from NYTimes

I am the friend that makes all these promises, and sets up dates, but doesn’t keep them.

I promise you it’s not on purpose though! In the moment I really do want to spend the time with my close friends, and I say yes with all intention of committing, but then things come up and I end up not holding my end of the deal. I’m sure as students you guys can relate with having to cancel things because you have class, or you have to write a paper that’s due.

At the same time, my friends know that I am super considerate of things important to them. If it’s an important occasion to them such as a birthday, housewarming, etc, I’ll do whatever I need to do to be there. Or say they have already invested money into something, like bought me a ticket ahead of time, they know I will be there. The thing is with a schedule like mine–juggling work, school, an internship, and my personal life, I heavily prioritize, and that affects my “friend language”.

So what is a friend language?

I don’t know if you have heard this before but they say we all have a love language which is basically how we show, receive, and understand love. This concept was introduced in a popular book, The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman, where he outlines that there are 5 universal ways in which people generally express and communicate love. You can read about them by clicking on this link. Also, if you click on the book title above, you can take a quiz to learn your love language!

The 5 love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

Here is a 5 love language “cheat sheet” that shows how people associated with the specific love languages typically define the expression of love.

chart

Photo Retrieved from Printable Pages

Now when it comes to your friend language, it is the same idea. Take a minute to think of your circle of friends. You may have that friend that who does not like to talk on the phone much, so if you want to talk to that friend you know you have to text them. Then you may have that friend who doesn’t like big crowds, so you have to consciously pick and choose things to invite that friend to so they aren’t uncomfortable. You may have that friend who offers great advice and can listen to you go for hours; and on the other hand, you have the friend who doesn’t talk much so you know not to go to them for those extensive conversations. Just think of the differences between your friends, and the things about their communication styles that make them unique.

Knowing your own friend language and the language of your friends can help in figuring out how to best be there for each other. There’s no set in stone definition for “friend languages” (I may actually be the first to coin the term, I should really look into that lol) but it is really about knowing how your friends communicate differently, what is important to them in friendship, and what is important to you.

Quote pic

Photo Retrieved from WCVANDOUWE Blog

What is your friend language? What things do you use to measure friendship? Is it quality time? Do you value friends more when they talk to you every day? Are you transparent with your friends on how you communicate and show that you value their friendship? Do you understand them? I think there is a lot of miscommunication in friendship, and any relationship for that matter, because one does not understand the others language.

I ask myself all the time how can I be a better friend? I have friends that get offended when I do not show up to things they invite me to because part of their friend language is they value quality time and social interaction. Whether you show up for them or not is important to them. Knowing that, I try to honor their feelings and show up to events more often because I know it’s important to them. This example right here is exactly what a friend language is, and how you can seek to learn, interpret, and understand it.

Can you be a better friend to someone now that you have thought about the different ways they may communicate and perceive your actions in the friendship? Is there a friend in your life that you think may not quite understand how you operate as a friend and maybe you need to be more clear?

These are important questions to reflect on because friendship can be beautiful when done right. Just like the picture above says it revolves around the concept of understanding.

Evaluate your friendships today for the better, understanding others is also understanding yourself.

 

Love ya, Neffi