The chapter in the Feynman book that is resonating with me most strongly right now as I am returning from a year on sabbatical is “The Dignified Professor.” On page 171, he writes about not doing research when he starts his first teaching job. He writes about how he underestimated just how much work it is to be a good teacher. Teaching “burned him out.” Then, as he begins to adjust to being a professor, the impulse and drive to do research begins to return. On page 173, he writes, “…I used to enjoy doing physics. Why did I enjoy it? I used to play with it.” He goes on the describe how observing a wobbling plate in the cafeteria ends in work for which he gets the Nobel prize.
Before my sabbatical, over the seven years that I had been at City Tech, I too had lost the joy in practicing my discipline which is photography. Little by little, I felt more and more guilt for not doing as much photography as I thought I should be. And at first on my sabbatical, all I was thinking about was quantity. As the year progressed, the “play” as Feynman would say returned. And the work got better. By fooling around to see what would happen, my newest and I think best body of work to date on the idea of the urban estuary started to happen. I don’t feel like I am making this work happen, willing it through discipline, it is just flowing out of working. I hope as I return to City Tech that I can keep Feynman in my mind as an example and remember that the best work begins with the pleasure of play.
I loved this story, and your post highlights why. I am just starting my career as an instructor and am still in the “pink cloud” phase, reaping the benefits of teaching without getting caught in the possible torpor of the work-a-day mindset. I do, however, know the pitfalls of burn out as I was completely fried at the end of my career as a full-time art director for an advertising agency. I was so encased in my burn-out I had ossified, and was no longer making my best work by a long shot. What revived me was my part-time teaching: having to find ways to articulate material I’d cynically dismissed was a humbling and rejuvenating experience.
Feynman experience seems to outline a great way of refocusing on one’s passions to enjoy life and accomplish goals. That experience suggests a strategy of putting things in perspective. It also highlights the importance of bringing excitement in the classroom.
I also enjoyed the Chapter on the Dignified Professor
What resonated with me was the fact that he was so brilliant but he was finding it difficult to write “good” lectures. He consoled himself with the thought that the institutions expectations were not his fault. He was who he was. Nice thoughts – after that he began to be himself and have some fun with his experiments and his classes. I think sometimes we are so focused on meeting tenure expectations or our department goals we forget that we have unique strengths we were hired for and to just have the courage to be who we are- and enjoy the class.
So true, let’s make this semester a time to celebrate our strengths and make our classrooms an engaging enviornment for students and teachers alike!
It’s important to say to ourselves that “I’m making some contribution”