Prof. Jessica Penner | OL02 | Spring 2021

Nelson Tavarez, POV story for picture C

Mary and her son Jared always took the bus back home after a long day. Mary works all day as a waitress at a diner. She’s a single mother with one kid. Jared is in his last year of high school. He would stay after school with his friends until his mother was done working and catch the bus together when it was time to go. They lived in Sacramento, California for their whole life. Mary worked another job at the houses keeping at a motel during the early mornings. She worked the early shift, so she could go to her main job as a waitress. Jared’s school was far off from her diner job, so they went at the same time and this made sure they were safe at the end of the day. Mary is too tired and tries to get some sleep on the way back home on the bus. Jared is an artist and likes to draw on the way to school and on the way back home. He tries to use the hour on the bus back home as a way to practice rather than wasting his time waiting.


  1. Alexsis

    I like how you gave a complete description of the two characters because it says a lot about them. Where is Jared’s father and why is he not in their lives?

  2. Ralph Ayala

    I like how detailed this story is being described.

  3. Ralph Ayala

    I like how detailed this story is being described.

  4. Jason Jordan

    I like how you were able to flesh out a interesting and engaging story just from a picture. I really enjoyed it as it sounds like an actual short story

  5. Kevin Navarrete

    I enjoyed descriptive you were because it gave me a better understanding for the story.

  6. JoharM

    I like the focus on the characters. I felt like it gave me more of an image for the bus ride rather than a description of the ride itself would’ve provided.

    One question I would ask is where is the father?

  7. Fnu Janvi

    I really enjoyed reading your short story because you include a lot of information about the character and very detailed as well.

  8. Sheely Menendez

    I really like this short story, I like how you were able to come up with a setting it makes the story being able to imagine or picture the story. and also the details are great and it can feel a little nostalgic

  9. Nuha

    I like how detailed you were on the characters and the struggle both mother and the son go through, but they are with each other in the end.

  10. BensonH

    really great story i’d love to see the picture that this came from and how much you made up

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