Shitty first draft

Shitty First Drafts

 

5 observation

 

  1. Different stereotypes people assume to be true about writers.
  2. Everyone struggles with composing their first  draft even when the novels turn out to be on the bestseller list.
  3. Being vulnerable in writing allows you to express better in paper.
  4. Writing process is recurring cycle , no matter how bad your first draft is it can get better by using some of the writing techniques.
  5. Humorous tone in the first paragraph.

 

Compelling moments

 

  1. When she discusses how vulnerable like a child allows you to pour out everything that you are meaning to express inn your paper because children has no filter and they say whatever  comes to their mind.
  2. “The next day, I’d sit down, go through it all with a colored pen, take out everything I possibly could, find a new lead somewhere on the second page, figure out a kicky place to end it, and then write a second draft. It always turned out fine, sometimes even funny and weird and helpful. I’d go over it one more time and mail it in.”  i was compelled by her strategies and tactics she used in order to write a second draft.

 

Question

  1. There were few grammar mistakes so was it purpose to represent the title “Shitty first draft” ?
  2. Purpose

 To tell  all the writers not to feel bad about their “ shitty first draft” and  it’s okay to have it because everyone else does it too.

The Death Penalty of Death & Execution

The death penalty can’t be the equivalent of a murder ever because that would it would be like repeating the crime again. The death penalty could be as severe as lethal injection because they do still dying off. The death penalty shouldn’t be abused in the court of law because many murder cases can revert to people who might want to die. The death penalty doesn’t withdraw any emotion from the victim’s parents and family they would still feel the pain. It is wrong to take a human beings life in general with or without the law.

 

The purpose of the reading was to bring attention to others that the death penalty survived in the society we live in now. Now there are many opinions on the death penalty staying in society even though dismissed in some states.

Why was the death penalty carried on for so long in different states?

One thing that had caught my attention was the effectiveness of the death penalty hadn’t been what I suspected if people have the mindset to still kill innocent victims. I don’t think that the death penalty scares many away from committing serial murders.

 

 

 

The Penalty Of Death & Execution By: Angel Vallejo

Reading through both articles you can sense the author’s strong arguments. I must admit though that Quindlen’s argument was clearer than Mencken’s. She argued how the death penalty is never equal to the murderer’s victim. Menken basically argued that the death penalty is useless and it wouldn’t affect the murderer at all.

One compelling moment is when Quindlen says “Our most profound emotional response is to want criminals to suffer as their victims did”. I agree with that one hundred percent because if you throw someone off a roof and your penalty is to die by an electrical chair; Those are two different types of pain.

Another compelling moment is how Menken repeatedly uses the katharis to prove his point throughout his piece.

Both authors purpose were to convince their audience that the death penalty does not make anything better, but more importantly that a death of a human will never be forgotten no matter how the murderer dies.

Did any of the author’s know anybody close to them that has been murdered?

The Penalty of Death by H.L. Mencken & Execution by Anna Quindlen (response)

Christine Mitchell

Sarah Ostiz

English 101

The Penalty of Death (1926) by H.L. Mencken &

Execution by Anna Quindlen (response)

 

 

 

 

Is the death penalty a justified punishment? Or is it just justice to those who were inflicted pain upon by losing a love one? In the article “ The Penalty of Death” H.L. Mencken speaks that yes the death penalty may seem unjustifiable to some, but to others it’s as he called a “Katharisis” it helps mend the pain one is dealing with in losing a daughter, by seeing justice prevail itself by taking the life of the one who caused the pain. He also stated people may see the death penalty unpleasant and revolting, but at the end it’s a job that has to be done. Then we have the article “Execution” Where Anna Quindlen states that sending a criminal to death is not justice at all, it’s more injustice. She states why death should be justified with death.

A piece that stood out to me in “ The Penalty of Death” was “ Any lesser penalty leaves them feeling that the criminal has got the better of society—that he is free to add insult to injury by laughing” (H.L. Mencken). For me depending on the crime I feel if one is able to take one’s life, then they should have the life of their own taken. To the ones that are left with the pain it’s a slap in the face when justice is not inflected, and it leaves the criminal thinking he has won and beat the system.

Something else that stood out to me in “The Penalty of Death” is “Commonly, it is described as revenge, but revenge is really not the word for it. I borrow a better term form the Aristotle: Katharis, so used, means a salubrious discharge of emotions, a healthy letting off steam” (H.L. Mencken). For me this quote kind of was personal to me, losing a sister by the hands of her then boyfriend all my family wanted was justice to be done and to some it seemed more like revenge, but it was more than that.

Now in the article “Execution” in some ways I agree with Anna Quindlen, why should we punish death with death, but then again why shouldn’t we? Something I like and agreed with was the line that read “I am hypocritical about the death penalty”, “But if my daughter had been the one clubbed to death as she slept in a Tallahassee sorority house, I would with the greatest pleasure rip out ted Bundy’s heart” (Quindlen). And I 100% agree with Quindlen this is a normal reaction for any mother, father, son ect… who has lost someone in their life you want to find that person and inflect the same pain and hurt then have inflected on you.

Another piece that stood out to me was “There is nothing anyone could do that is bad enough for an adult who took a 5-year-old boy away from his parents, perhaps tortured, then murdered him and cut off his head. Nothing at all. Lethal injection? The electric chair?” (Quindlen). For me yes there is by sending them to death, why should he be allowed to continue to walk this earth. The death penalty was put here for justice to those who commit wrongful death, it may seem sinister to some, but for me it’s justifiable.

I believe the author’s purpose of both these article was share and show the views people have on the death penalty; to persuade people to be against it or to be for it. The death penalty may not be justice to some, but may be justifiable to others.

City Limits by Colson Whitehead

Christine Mitchell

Sarah Ostiz

English 101

City Limits by Colson Whitehead (response)

 

 

 

 

Have you ever taken a moment to acknowledge your city? Have you ever taken the time to appreciate the moments you share with your city? Well in the story “City Limits” Colson Whitehead speaks about how he remembers his city and how over time his city has changed. Building, stores, pizza shops that had once been on the corner of your old neighborhood, is now the home of a Liberian who opened up her and first book store or the building you once lived in now is a travel agency. Even though over the time your city may not look the same or things and stores that were once there aren’t, but in some way they are still there, because you are, it lives in your memories.

One thing that stood out to me and loved was when he stated “You start building your private New York the first time you lay eyes on it” (Whitehead). What I took from that was New York is different to each and every person, we all share different moments and memories. For me New York has been my home my whole life, so it has seen me grow from this little peanut head, to the adult that I am now. New York has seen me through all my different stages in life, as well as I have seen New York grow and change over the years.

Something else that stood out to me was “ There are eight million naked cities in this naked city-they dispute and disagree, the New York City you live in is not my New York City; how could it be? This place multiplies when you’re not looking” (Whitehead). Everything that we once knew to be here or there, shops or movie theaters we once went to here is now moved and replace. Nothing ever seems nor stay the same. And not once we were able to say good bye to what was once our favorite store.

“We can never make proper good-byes” (Whitehead). Since we never get the time to appreciate things, we only notice things when they’re gone and stay with the “I wish I was able to go there one last time feeling”.

I think the purpose of Colson Whitehead in writing this story was to tell people over the time things will change and not remain the same, but New York will always be the same in your eyes, because of the history and moments you shared with it. Also take the time to appreciate your city, appreciate your neighborhood the first place you called home, because we might not see it again as we once knew it. New York City has grown and will continue to change, but your love and memories will keep it the same.

 

 

Death penalty

1. The death penalty is used to deter others from the same crimes.
2. There’s many people against the death penalty.
3. People have a wait period after the decision of death. It may be months or years until the execution takes place.
4. Law abiding citizens don’t feel secure until a community criminal is taken down.
5. Most people want criminals to feel the suffrage of their victims.

1. “I don`t believe deterrence is what most proponents seek from the death penalty. Our most profound emotional response is to want criminals to suffer as their victims did.” After the tragic series of current events (innocent lives being taken) many people believe that life in prison or the death penalty is too easy of a punishment.
2. “He must have time to make peace with God.” This is ironic that the same people who decided to play God (by taking away a life), are the same people who decided to allow a criminal to make spiritual peace.

1. Do you not believe that taking away a criminals life is equally wrong?
2. Do you think legal judicial execution is totalitarianism, if a “law abiding citizens”, can not do the same?

1. The authors wrote these articles to defend, and persuade readers on their beliefs in death penalty. There’s obviously two standpoints on execution, there’s pro death penalty and abolitionists.

The Penalty of Death & Execution

Observations:

  • Its a dreadful job for those who perform the Death Penalty
  • It does not deter other criminals from committing the same crimes
  • Catharsis is the main objective of it
  • Catharsis is used to square things even / Eye for an eye
  • It isn’t looked bad upon by natures men
  • The criminal suffers while the case is being solved

Compelling Moments:

  • I found it interesting when H.L. Mencken wrote about people who have to perform the execution. I had never thought about execution from the point of view of the executioners.
  • How its not done for the safety of the public, but more for the catharsis received by the victims

Questions to Author:

  • Are the executioners interviewed and ask on what they think about the job?

Authors Purpose:

  • I believe the Author wrote this article in order to share to the reader the different views on the Death Penalty. Though many people may agree or disagree with the death penalty, there are ultimately valid reasons as to why death by capital punishment is just or unjust. In short words, capital punish is just because it brings a sense of relief, known as “catharsis” to the victims. On the other hand it is seen as unjust because it morally wrong to take the life of a human being for the feeling of pleasure.

Shitty First Drafts

Observations:

  • All writers write shitty first drafts
  • Most writers don’t really know what they’ll write about
  • First drafts are meant to get out all of your thoughts on paper
  • Even the most terrible of first drafts can hide something good to write about
  • Professional writers have trouble with writing as well
  • To write well written paper, you would usually need to write about 2 drafts first

Compelling moments:

  • I found it compelling when Anne said she would panic before writing every review, even though she had been doing this for years and was well experienced
  • I found it interesting how this article was published by Anne Lamott and the article still contained a handful of grammar errors which shows how she still had mistakes in her writing

Question for Author:

Did she purposely write this article with grammar errors to convince readers that even professional writers write shitty drafts?

Authors Purpose:

I believe that Anne Lamott wrote this article to explain to the reader and all writers that everyone writes shitty first drafts. The article describes the struggles that a professional  writer like herself goes through writing reviews which helps the reading make a connection to their own experiences when writing.

Notes from 4/21/15 and Homework

INTEGRATING SOURCES

You should never have a quotation standing alone as a complete sentence, or, even worse, as an incomplete sentence, in your writing. All quotations need an introduction in the student writer’s own words. This often includes a signal phrase.

There are 4 main ways to integrate quotations:

 1. Introduce the quotation with a complete sentence and a colon.

 McWhorter points out that grammar is a low priority in schools, and thus the state of an applicant’s grammar is often beyond his or her control: “It’s more likely the fault of the individual’s education than laziness” (McWhorter 1).

“The Story of an Hour” ends with a devastating irony: “When the doctors came they said she had died of heart disease—of joy that kills” (Chopin 58).

** This is an easy rule to remember. If you use a complete sentence to introduce a quotation, you need a colon after the sentence. Be careful not to confuse a colon (:) with a semicolon (;). Using a comma in this situation will most likely create a comma splice, one of the first grammatical issues we covered this semester.

 

2. Use an introductory or explanatory phrase, but not a complete sentence, separated from the quotation with a comma.

Because of grammar’s low priority in schools, McWhorter argues, “[Poor grammar is] more likely the fault of the individual’s education than laziness” (McWhorter 1).

One can assume that Sylvia did, in fact, understand Ms. Moore’s lesson when she says, “Ain’t nobody gonna beat me at nuthin” (Bambara 659).

**You should use a comma to separate your own words from the quotation when your introductory or explanatory phrase ends with a verb such as “says,” “thinks,” “believes,” “claims,” “argues,” “questions,” and “asks” (and many more). You should also use a comma when you introduce a quotation with a phrase such as “According to”: According to McWhorter, “[Poor grammar is] more likely the fault of the individual’s education than laziness” (McWhorter 1).

 

3. Make the quotation a part of your own sentence without any punctuation between your own words and the words you are quoting.

Because of grammar’s low priority in schools, McWhorter argues that “[poor grammar is] more likely the fault of the individual’s education than laziness” (McWhorter 1).

One can assume that Sylvia did, in fact, understand Ms. Moore’s lesson when she says that “ain’t nobody gonna beat me at nuthin” (Bambara 659).

**Notice that the word “that” is used in the examples above, and when it is used this way, “that” replaces the comma which would otherwise be necessary. You usually have a choice, then, when you begin a sentence with a phrase such as “McWhorter says.” You either can add a comma after “says” (McWhorter says, “quotation”) or you can add the word “that” with no comma (McWhorter says that “quotation”).

 

4. Use short quotations—only a few words—as part of your own sentence.

Because of grammar’s low priority in schools, McWhorter argues that poor grammar is “more likely the fault of the individual’s education than laziness” (McWhorter 1).

People’s applications shouldn’t be discarded just because they “don’t quite know their way around a semicolon,” especially if they are qualified for the job in other ways (McWhorter).

**When you integrate quotations in this way, you do not use any special punctuation. Instead, you should punctuate the sentence just as you would if all of the words were your own. No punctuation is needed in the sentences above in part because the sentences do not follow the pattern explained under number 1 and 2 above: there is not a complete sentence in front of the quotations, and a word such as “says” or “asks” does not appear directly in front of the quoted words.

 

REVIEW

  • Rule 1: Complete sentence: “quotation” (citation).
  • Rule 2: Someone says, “quotation”  (citation).
  • Rule 3: Someone says that “quotation”  (citation).
  • Rule 4: If Rules 1-3 do not apply, do not use any punctuation between your words and the quoted words.

 

A FEW NOTES ON PUNCTUATION:

If there are no parenthetical citations in the sentences (no author’s name and page number in parentheses), the commas and periods go inside the final quotation mark (“like this.”).

Question marks and exclamation points go outside of the final quotation mark if the punctuation mark is part of your sentence–your question or your exclamation (“like this”?). Those marks go inside of the final quotation mark if they are a part of the original–the writer’s question or exclamation (“like this!”).

Use brackets ([ ]) to change verbs or other parts of the original quotes when necessary, and ellipses (. . .) to shorten a long sentence. These techniques are especially useful for maintaining present tense in your paper.

If your quote is longer than 4 typed lines, it must be offset in your essay.

 

SUMMARY:
A summary is when you condense a substantial amount of material into a paragraph or perhaps a single sentence. Summaries are used when you don’t want to provide too many details, just a central idea.

  • Summaries are objective (no opinion)
  • Your annotated bibliography requires you to summarize.

PARAPHRASE:
A paraphrase retells the information of a source in approximately the same number of words, clinging much more closely to the intent and content of a particular line or passage.

  • Be careful not to follow your source’s wording too closely as this will constitute plagiarism.


 

HOMEWORK

  • Integrating Sources exercises due Thursday.
  • Read A Debate About the Death Penalty, which includes two short pieces: “The Penalty of Death” by H.L. Mencken and “Execution” by Anna Quindlen (pgs. 443-453). Post a single reading response to OpenLab.
  • Revisions to Essay #2 also due Thursday!
    • Note: Altering a few sentences is not going to change your grade. You really have to rework the paper at its foundation to improve.
  • Work on your research project. Your proposal & annotated bibliography, as well as your essay’s first draft, are all due on Tuesday, 4/28.

Shitty First Drafts

The key items that I had observed while reading this passage was the importance of a first draft dealing with how to shape your final essay from a poor first draft that had been written just to get a main idea across. There shouldn’t be any more than 3 drafts in order to fulfill what an actual paper should look like. The author expresses herself by saying that she also has a hard time writing and the only way she can get into the groove of completing a well piece is to write a poorly written first draft. The author had a used strategies on her first drafts such as writing about the same topic for three pages. To excel at writing we should definitely have more than just one draft, and on the first draft collect many ideas to gain more thought process to do better.

While reading things that had caught my attention on the authors past events with rough drafts were how she would attack the paper .The author would start and wouldn’t stop until finished all beginning with the warm up sentences to the last page of her piece.

What was Anne Lamont’s drive to keep rewriting drafts from the start?

The purpose of the this reading was to explain to the reader that writing isn’t easy and it takes time and the more you can revise the better the outcome of the work.