17 thoughts on “Feedback for Leo”

  1.  I like how you went into details about how marijuana is a “gateway” drug and how you mentioned that when people are mentioning marijuana they alway categorize it with cocaine and crystal meth. Also when you mentioned that marijuana is not like other drugs and it can’t harm you the way other drugs can. I also think marijuana should be legalized, just like you mentioned it can’t kill you, it’s rare to overdose on so it should be legalized.

  2. I like how you started your essay I also like the thesis you chose It was very interesting and you made many valid points that support your thesis. I like the quote you used “… too much of one thing is never good for you hell even too much water can kill you and we need it to live”. I also agree with your thesis I think marijuana should be legalized it was very convincing since you mentioned how marijuana has led to zero deaths and is illegal while alcohol and tobacco is legal and leads to many deaths. I liked your counterclaim as well. Overall, good essay I would just add a personal experience.

  3. I really enjoyed your essay. You had a very strong argument that you supported with great evidence. You also had a counterclaim which you supported with examples and you explained them too. Marijuana should be legal. Your essay convinced me to agree with you even more. You can include personal experience next time. If I was to use a essay to convince people that marijuana should be legal I would use yours. Great Essay!

  4. I like your thesis, you made  valid points about alcohol and marijuana. I also loved how you used a way different topic instead of social media and video games which was interesting to read. Your counterclaim was strong and your essay had many different details you can probably add your personal experience .

  5. I really liked that you chose a different topic for your essay, and I really liked this topic. You supported it well with examples and research which shows that you knew what you were talking about. The downsides of the essay would be the length of your introduction and conclusion paragraphs I believe they were too short. Also, with a topic like this, it would be good to add personal experience because it would create a stronger connection to perspective on the matter.

  6. I enjoyed how you started off your introduction but for your claim, it would have been better if you did not make it sound like it was directly from you. For example taking out ” I personally think” would have made the claim better with a good flow to it.  Another improvement that could have been made is instead of going straight to the point in your first body paragraph, it would have been better to catch the readers attention then get to the point. But, other than that you were able to prove your points with solid evidence and I enjoyed the fact that you chose this topic to write about since it is controversial.

  7. Your first sentence immediately brought me in I was not expecting that but I like how you explain each quote That you included include and explained the definition of Dopamine. Have you or anyone around you been affected by marijuana is so what did It do? You essay was very detailed and you knew everything you was speaking about. Marijuana is Legal now also but you are only allowed to have a certain amount

  8. I liked the way you started your essay; the fact that you mentioned/used all the names marijuana is known by was a cool detail. I also admire that you brought up the argument that marijuana is a gateway drug, which I don’t think it is. The humor you added to your essay helped keep me engaged as well. Maybe add some personal experience, if you have any, but, overall great essay.

  9. I liked your essay because you talked about something different in which marijuana can also have a positive way, apart from all the negativities that have been argued in reference, despite the fact that different types of drugs have good and bad effects, you knew to clarify very well and specifically because they should legalize them and how the technology they fear can now support in search of a well-being for people who really need them. Your counterclaim was strong and your essay had many different details you can probably, In my view, adding your own experience is not a good idea, because I don’t think you need to experiment or do something to know a lot.

  10. I really liked your chose different topic to write the essay. your essay really changed by view of marijuana and people who smokes marijuana. I think could have used your life experience.

  11. I think the essay raises a pretty bold narrative of an idea. However it’s and idea that is executed quite well. You give really good detail on the positives of marijuana. Personally I will never smoke in my life but it is pretty intriguing to hear from someone who may be experienced in taking marijuana.

  12.  I like how you started off be giving us different names of weed and you gave us a clear claim. You then went on to give us examples of how weed can be very helpful in different ways such as easing pain. You also spoke about how weed isn’t the same type of drug as these chemically made drugs because the side effects are different 

  13. your essay was really good. I think it’s a topic that used to be a taboo and still but a little bit. I like how you went on talking about why marihuana should be legal and not illegal. I really liked when you mention that marihuana has 0 deaths and I didn’t believe it, but I did a little search and it was true, and I found it very surprising. I think that you had very surprising points of view that not all people liked to share. really good essay! it was one of my favorites.

  14. You made a strong claim about how marijuana has many positive effects compared to other drugs that are legalized. Your essay included a lot of evidence about the benefits of marijuana and you introduced a strong claim to your counter claim that while many other drugs have the same side effects as marijuana, they can’t compare to the fact that there were 0 deaths in marijuana users. It’s a good essay overall with a few grammatical errors that can be fixed

  15. I like the part in your essay where you state too much of anything can be bad for you like water. I also liked how you state why marijuana is different from the drugs that are considered bad. Overall your essay is good except for the few grammatical errors.

  16. I really enjoyed reading your essay. I liked how you decided to write about a different topic. You brought up good points and supported them with a source. I also liked how you made it interesting to read. For example, when you stated the statistics on the deaths caused by drugs and then emphasized that weed has killed “ZERO” and went on to say that even water kills. I suggest you add a personal experience.

  17. I liked your essay and I thought you gave a lot of good points. Personally I think at this point it should be legalized since so many people use it. It’s illegal yet people still get their hands on it for their on personal use. Some say it’s bad for you and others think it’s a gate away for them and a nice way to escape. So legalizing it will just give people the option to decide if they really want to intake it or not.

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