9 thoughts on “Feedback for Jazmin Martinez Castillo”

  1. I like how you started your essay its something that instantly catches the readers attention, I also like how you mentioned how you struggled growing up due to being a Spanish speaker but looking American it really shows how people are quick to make assumptions due to appearance.  I liked how you ended your essay as well making readers feel motivated to follow their dreams. Overall, I found your essay very interesting but would definitely add more details about how you overcame this struggle and how going through this made you feel.

  2. I enjoyed how towards the end of the essay, you kept your head up and held yourself together. You had a lot of faith through this obstacle you were going through. This was something many people can relate too. However, I believe your spacing for the paragraphs could of been better. But, overall it was a good essay.

  3. I really liked sone of  your statement, like the last paragraph first line. but really want know more about how you felt when people called you gringa you could have example more. overall I really enjoyed your essay.

  4. I liked your essay because I can relate to it. also I liked the last paragraph how you explain very deep. Something you could do is add a tittle and add where you from.

  5. I liked how you portrayed emotion throughout your essay. I think you should add more narrative, and how you overcame your struggle. Also, connect what your definition of the “American Dream” is to you being an immigrant. Overall, I liked your essay.

  6. I love how you talked about being an immigrant and how you felt , I would like to see a bit more narrative. I also like how throughout the essay I saw character growth. I felt like I could relate to your essay because , although I’m not an immigrant I was raised by one so I understand

  7. I really enjoyed your essay and thought you gave a good description on your feelings and how you felt. Also you gave good details along with showing character growth throughout your essay.

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