Between two world’s – Omar

Have you had the experience of living between two different worlds, perhaps each with its own language or traditions or values?  In your own life how have “ambiguous” feelings or internal  conflicted feelings–about language, identity, injustice, or opportunities that put distance between you and your family–affected your own educational journey?  What actions have you taken to  address the conflict?  Or, how have you learned to live with it?

Be sure to explain to your reader exactly which two worlds (or more!) you belong to.  You might be bi-lingual or bi-cultural, but you may also consider other world besides nationality–race, class, gender or gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, education, or other.

The way I lived in two worlds was knowing how to act and how I talked in different settings. All my life I’ve been around diversity. I’ve went to elementary and middle school in park slope, and I went to high school in the Midwood area . I always had different race friends, In elementary school I use to have this one white friend it use to be him and I. We use to cause so much trouble, the school and his mom decided to remove him from the school, I would like to reunite with him one day . Being around so much type’s of cultures can changed your mind set about the world, if we could all just come together. When I use to get home around my people from school , my attitude would change 180. From the way I talk to the way move, when I’m around different cultures I talk in a more proper way when I get around my area friends I’ll talk less proper and some slang.

My mother was the reason I was always in a diverse school . I had no choice in elementary school in middle school my mother gave me an inch and I took a mile so she sent me back to my old school which had a middle school too. When it was time for to go to high school I didn’t want to go to Midwood my mother made it my first choice , my first choice was Ehall. I want to go to Ehall for football and I knew people that went there, but my mother knew about the school and wasn’t allowing it to happen. I thank my mom for putting me in diverse schools. It opened my eyes to new cultures and it really showed me how to act around different people. No shade to my people but majority of African Americans don’t know how to talk or act when they’re in different setting, they kept the slang the white people gave us from slavery everywhere they go.

1 thought on “Between two world’s – Omar”

  1. Omar: This is interesting. However, you need a lot more details. You have a lot of vague writing here. You do a lot of telling but you need to SHOW me with details, description, explanations, writing lists.

    IMPORTANT: What are the TWO different worlds you are focusing on here? State these worlds in clear language. Which diverse groups? Are you writing about Your Home World vs Your School World? Your African American world vs the multi-ethnic American World? You need to say it clearly: What are the two different worlds that you navigate between?

    YOu might want to consider making a connection to our discussion on Olivarez and his questioning of the word “diverse.”

    I COPY YOUR FREE WRITE WITH MY COMMENTS NOW:

    The way I lived in two worlds was knowing how to act and how I talked in different settings [explain “knowing how to act” and “talking in different settings”]. All my life I’ve been around diversity. [clarify what you mean with this word – remember Jose Olivarez discussed the many meanings of diverse – Maybe you can make a connection to his idea an dyour idea of how America is or is not a country of diversity.] I’ve went [CORRECT: I’ve gone] to elementary and middle school in park slope [Capital!], and I went to high school in the Midwood area [WHAT HS?] . I always had different race friends [what ethnic backgrounds are your friends, name your friends and detail their ethnic heritages], In elementary school I use to have this one white friend it use to be him and I. We use to cause so much trouble, the school and his mom decided to remove him from the school, I would like to reunite with him one day .

    NEW PARAGRAPH: Being around so much type’s of cultures [you really have NOT shown me your classmates at school and the ethnic backgrounds] can changed your mind set about the world, if we could all just come together. When I use to get home around my people from school , my attitude would change 180. From the way I talk to the way move, when I’m around different cultures I talk in a more proper way when I get around my area friends I’ll talk less proper and some slang. [Describe a memory of how you can switch from being in one world and then in the other world. How do you talk, behave in school? At home? Can you think of the best memory that of the two YOUs?]

    My mother was the reason I was always in a diverse school [WHAT DOES THIS MEAN, describe the “diverse”]. I had no choice in elementary school in middle school my mother gave me an inch and I took a mile so she sent me back to my old school which had a middle school too. When it was time for to go to high school I didn’t want to go to Midwood [Midwood HS is reputed to be one of the better schools in Brooklyn] my mother made it my first choice , my first choice was Ehall. I want to go to Ehall for football and I knew people that went there, but my mother knew about the school and wasn’t allowing it to happen. [Why was this school choice important? What are you saying about TWO different worlds? Is one school populated by certain ethnic groups? EXPLAIN YOUR POINT ABOUT DIFFERENT SCHOOLS AND THE CHOICE YOU MADE. Then, what high school did you attend? What two different worlds are you talking about here? IS this a scene in your memory, the talk about which school to attend? If so consider creating a scene here.] I thank my mom for putting me in diverse schools [again how are you using the word diverse mean here?]. It opened my eyes to new cultures and it really showed me how to act around different people.

    You write: No shade to my people but majority of African Americans don’t know how to talk or act when they’re in different setting, they kept the slang the white people gave us from slavery everywhere they go. — Wow, this parting thought is a loaded statement? What is your point about yourself being in two different worlds? In your high school years, did you learn something about moving between two different worlds? Again say what high school you went to and how that influeced you? What did you learn? How has being able to move between TWO different worlds influenced who you are today? As a student, as a person?].

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