English 1121 Journey

  1. Opener- uses a quote and uses an article as the source
  2. Thesis is stated clearly and sub topics and they are clear and capturing
  3. All paragraphs have sub topics in it. I like the format of the essay, but why give all 3 sub-topics in a row and then added the sub-sub topic in the end?
  4. Transitional phrases are in every paragraph except on the 3rd paragraph, making the research even more powerful.
  5. References are in every paragraph and are clear and in MLA form
  6. Grammar just needs a few adjustments to it. She uses “so” as the beginning of the sentence. Its like using “and” or “but” for starting a sentence.
  7. She had a strong conclusion, but went over the ‘4 page’ limit by a little.



Overall, I’ve enjoyed reading this research essay.