is this book Laurent’s reality or what she wanted to be real? Does Dr. Neu exist? The article she showed to the psychologist was Dr. Neuâs paper. And the psychologist says itâs fake that Dr. Neu was another lie of Lauren âis that there is no Dr. Neu anywhere in the world who would perform a corpus colostomy on a patient with TLE. Itâs just not doneâ (176). This whole book was made in order to fill Laurentâs void, created by her mother. She steal things, feint illness, played with words, lies and cheap. Everything, in order to close that whole within her âperhaps Iâve just felt fitful my whole life; perhaps Iâm using metaphor to tell my tale, a tale I know no other way of telling, a tale of my past, my mother and meâ (192). Â Laurent talks about the gift again, and says that she didn’t became what her mother wanted her to be âa gift. And in that mirror we saw who I had not become, the gift I hadn’t given her, so I gave it to her thenâ(191)
Author Archives: julio
Lies
This whole chapter involves Laurenâs growth. I think the surgery is a metaphor too, that divides Lauren child/innocent before the operation and the more mature 17 year old girl after the surgery. After the surgery her seizures were less, and less intense. Her body matures and she starts with auras, one of then happened while typing that lead to an orgasm âI had an aura that ended in an orgasmâ(111). Â Then we are introduced to her sexual live that began with Christopher. âIn my brain there was a gap where Dr. Neu had separated the sides, and in my body there was a gap, barely stitched together rip, and all you had to do was press its seams and it would split..â(132) Lauren compares Christopher and Dr. Neu, who created a hole in Laurens brain, and Christopher who breaks her body.I never thought about it, but what Laurent says its true â ..only human beings can lieâ(133) not verbally speaking, but we are the only race that can fake, feelings emotions.
Lying
Laurenâs unreliability makes this bookâŠso fake. I donât know what to believe now; itâs taking the magic out of the book. Or should I say I havenât understood her metaphor yet. Lauren says âI felt to speak would be to betray my motherâ (37) when they were talking to Dr. Swan. But after the super maker accident âI wanted to answer, but the words got tangled in my throatâ (43) is contradicting herself, because she betrayed her. As she learns how to âfallâ she got addicted to it, at the point, where she just does it every time she pleases regardless whether it might be true or not. âI would do it for anyone who asked, and sometimes for anyone who didnâtâ (55) I really donât like being force to believe or lead by others. So far in this book Lauren, has leaded us to believe in scenes created by her and then reveals the truth through a metaphor. âI didnât really fail into the grave I was using metaphor to try to explain my mental state.â(60) In other words, her spasm, her whole ill was getting worse.
The part where she starts to steal things from her neighbor, I think she was just trying to fill the whole she had. Or the whole epilepsy has created âI slipped her in my pocket, and before I left the house I saw the small space I had made on the Slonicksâ wall, a gap in the middle of human history where Henrietta used to be, and for a minute I felt full, and the emptiness now outside of me.â(70)
I think lying is a human nature, almost as of our body. If this book its call Lying and the first chapter is âI exaggerateâ how can I assume everything that follows is real?  Feels like Humbertâs style, unreliable narrator. I was attracted to her description of epilepsy, how alive it feels; the first symptom the smell of Jasmine âI didnât know, then, that epilepsy often begins with strange smellsâ (4). How she describes after her first seizure the visual of her teeth during spasms of epilepsy âyour grit your teeth, you clench, a spastic look crawls across your face âŠyou grind your teeth with such a force you might wake up with a mouth full of molar dustâ(19).
The narratorâs mother, whatâs up with her, she didnât care about her first seizure âand so I waited, but she never appeared to nurse me that night, and this is a grudge I still hold.â (20). and the part before that, where she just played the all-knowing and never touch the piano.
Dolores ” i will create a brand new god…”
I am disappointed by the end of the book. During the time when Lolita is missing, Humbert affirms that without Lolita, Humbert is losing his little sanity he had left. âI understood my mind was crackingâ (255). And that no matter how strong his love is, nothing will change his sick mind about pedophilia âthe reader a fool to believe, that the shock of losing Lolita cured me of Pederosisâ (257).
In order for Humbert to calm his demons, he uses Rita. âSolitude was corrupting me. I needed company and care. My heart was a hysterical unreliable organ. This is how Rita enters the picture.â (258). Itâs funny because, during the description of Rita, Lolita is the first name that appears.
After Lolita re-enters into the book, Humbert ruined my hypothesis, I thought he would kill her and then her kidnaper. Humbert proof me wrong âI could not kill her, of course, as some have thought. You see, I loved hr. it was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.â (270). Humbert mental words shattered my mind, âhe broke my heart, you merely broke my lifeâ (279) this is what Humbert thinks heâs done to Lolita. The rejection of Lolita to go back in Humbert life, broke havoc in Humbertâs mind, he intended to kill Lolita kidnaper Quilty âI was quite sure I had to go. I had to go, and find him, and destroy himâ (280)
I was disenchanted by the way Humbert kills Quilty. I would have preferred to see more mental bloody scenes. I would picked all of the Spanish inquisition tortures to Quilty such as, judas cradle, the rack and my favorite the saw torture (when saw cuts victim in half).
Dolores
During this part, I see H.H first as the hunter then as the prey⊠âThe hunter becomes the huntedâ. H.H. travels around the country, by traveling H.H have evaded the trouble with society and his sick affair with Lolita. H.H also at the first chapter tries to manipulate Lolita by saying that she has no one else but him âso I go to jail. Okay. I go to jail. But what happened to you, my orphan?â (151). in one occasion he jealous of a tall man that plays with Lolita, ânoticed Lo in white shorts receding through the speckled shadow of a garden path in the company of a tall manâ his sick obsess towards Lolita just grows bigger and bigger, to a point where H.H send Lolita to a School for girls. H.H ill delusion makes him imaging the scenario of Lolita toying with other nymphets at the school playground, but unfortunately, builders ruin his view âby means of powerful binoculars, the statistically inevitable percentage of nymphets among the other girl-children playing around Dollyâ (179). H.H starts noticing how naĂŻve he was and how was being control by Lolita âbut I was weak, I was not wise, my schoolgirl nymphet had me in thrall.â (183). Lolita start to change, to rebel against H.H, when she demands higher fees for sexual favors, H.H paranoiac with the thought that, with the money Lolita has saved, so she cannot run away. Eventually H.H takes away the money.
H.H, after all his magical manipulation his cold thinking and all, he recklessly do something so irrational âunbuttoned my overcoat and for sixty-five cents plus the permission to participate in the school play, had Doly put her inky, chalky, red-knuckled hand under the deskâ (198). Maybe I am thinking too much, maybe I am traumatized by how our professor makes us think outside the box, But she is masturbating H.H in front of Lolitaâs unnamed friend âand there was another girl with a very naked, porcelain-white neck and wonderful platinum hair, who sat in front reading tooâ (198). This happened in a public place.
Lolita transforms from a nymphet (caterpillar) to where we are now, the metamorphoses into adulthood, and later the manipulation or seduction towards H.H. this fact occurs when they both fight and Lolita escapes in chapter 16.
Dolores
âI had actually seen the agent of fate. I had palpated the very flesh of fate and its padded shoulder.â (103) Humbert blames many of his ideas to fate, not just in this session but throughout the few chapters I have read. When Humbert is at the hotel, after drugging Lolita, he tells us âFrigid gentlemen of the jury! By six she was wide awake, and by six fifteen we were technically lovers. I am going to tell you something very strange: it was she who seduced meâ. (132) He has played with us before; he has through his book the power of confusion. He has proved himself, at times an unreliable narrator. He also admits he doesnât remember details perfectly. Can I believe that Lolita truly seduced him? On the other hand, Lolitaâs behavior does fit with her nasty, flirtatious nature â You mean, she persisted, now kneeling above me, âyou never did it when you were a kid?â â (133). As further matter, Humbert doesnât describe the actual act of sex with Lolita in detail, as he says ânot concerned with so-called âsexâ at allâ. I think for Humbert, Lolita addiction goes beyond physical lust. Even when Humbert drugs Lolita, he only daydreams about her body. Humbers way of writing, transport me to his side of reality, where everything he has done is sane and nothing wrong with his action. As he is trying to convincing us, he was forced to do everything.
a perfect lover i would say. i love the way he uses the diary like a device for us to see Lolita through Humbert’s passionate eyes in an utterly subjective,supposedly private form. this might sound funny but the scene when Lolita sat next to Humbert and was playing with her apple”My heart beat like a drum as she sat down, cool skirt ballooning, subsiding, on the sofa next to me, and played with her glossy fruit”. it kinda resembled to me the Garden of Eden story. Lolita, as Eve, eats the red apple, while she is ignorant of what is happening, and i would say Humbert as Adam.
even though Humbert believe they are connected by fate, i think Lolita sees Humbert as a father figure, he says her running upstairs “interrupted the motion of fate” (pg 66)
Humbert is the puppeteer and we all are his puppets, the way he manipulates the people around like he admits to the jury(us) he has toyed with the idea of marrying a widow to have his way with her child. , the steps he plans ahead of time “when i had brought up for detached inspection the idea of marrying a mature widow..with not one relative left in the wide gray world, merely in order to have my way with her child(lo, Lola ,Lolita).(pg 70)
Lolita
I totally hate this book; itâs so complicated to read. The little that I understood was that the narrator was raised by his father and that his mother had died suddenly and he describes this traumatic event with only two words: âpicnic, lightningâ. It gets more interesting when he met Annabel. Though they are just friends at the beginning, their friendship soon changes into passionate, adolescent love. Itâs awkward because they never manage to consummate their âloveâ, and four months late she dies. I think Humbert started liking young girls because Annabel. He also says that he was only to able to break free of Annabelâs spell when he met Lolita. He tells the reader that he was only able to break free of Annabelâs spell when he met Lolita, more than twenty years later. I like when Humbert used Greek, Jewish, Latin mythology terms, like eve, Lilith, and nymphet, which is a girl between the ages of nine and fourteen(according to Humbert). Heâs sexually attracted to this type of prostitutes. Then he gets married to Valeria, he chooses Valeria because of her childlike nature.
The Ones Who Walk Away
I found this story to be extremely creepy, and I got a cold feeling when I read it. In this story, Omelas is an Utopian city of happiness and pleasure, whose inhabitants are smart and cultured. everything about Omelas is amusing, except for the secret of the city “the good fortune of Omelas requires that a single unfortunate child be kept in perpetual filth, darkness and misery”. i believe it’s wrong to live in Omelas. The citizens live in what they choose to believe is a perfect world, without despair or sorrow. in reality, when each person come of age, they are command to observe a small child that lives in constant misery. About it, the narrator says, âperhaps it was born defective, or perhaps it has become imbecile through fear, malnutrition, and neglectâ. The child is the one in particular in Omelas who lives without happiness, yet no one chooses to help it. Rather, most simply accept that, if anything were to change, the ââŠbeauty and delight of Omelas would wither and be destroyedâ. On the other hand, those who cannot accept the idea simply âgo out into the street, and walk down the street alone. They keep walking, and walk straight out of the city of OmelasâŠâ. The people who walk away from the city Omelas are people that can not bare to live a life of isolation and happiness , at the expense of another life. Are these people that walk away more compassionate than the ones that stay, is it a easy choice to make to walk away.
Leaving Omelas, like living there, I find immoral as well. Both actions require complete ignorance of the fact that in the town there is a young child who is suffering. After reading many question came to my mind such as, must one suffer so all can be happy? Is torture âjustifiedâ if it will save lives? is one life worth any more than another? It is the same as saying that we can trade one person for another, simply because one person is seen as lesser in the eyes of the world.