” What a metaphor expresses cannot be said directly or apart from it for if it could be, one would have said it directly. Here, metaphor is a strategy of desperation, not decoration” (169). Lauren expresses her epilepsy in both biological and spiritual explanation. Lauren states ” The biological explanation of my epilepsy is that a small scar formed on the left temporal lobe of my brain; the spiritual explanation is that God, in sculpting me from paste” (169). The only physical explanation is the scar from her surgery. But since Lauren’s surgery she never had any outburst of seizures, just feelings of auras. These auras lead Laura into writing, which took up most of her time to express her feelings for only a brief amount of time. Lauren eventually joined an AA group, were she met new people and convinced them her epilepsy was just like AA.Lauren began to accepted and loved, which is what she desperately longed for. Lauren’s desperation for attention drawn her to be apart of the AA group where she was a decoration instead of an actual member with real alcoholic drinking problems. Even though Lauren did participate in the AA group she really could not relate to the struggle the rest of the group had problems with. That is why when asked how long she had been sober for she did not know what to say,then questioning even herself why she was there. Lauren used her epilepsy as an excuse to join the AA group but all she wanted was attention.
Lauren’s relationship with male figures is currently directed towards Dr. Neu. Dr. Neu is Lauren’s pediatric doctor who performs her procedure on her brain. ” He had long talks with me in the hospital cafeteria, telling me I would his patient for years to come” (94). From Dr.Neu talks with Lauren, she began to create this future with him. Lauren would go into details about there visits, thinking she was the only one in his life and they would fall in love with each other. Lauren created these thoughts about Dr.Neu before the day of her surgery where she realized Dr. Neu was not the only one in his life. After facing the reality of Dr. Neu’s family Lauren was shocked and began to release some of her emotions,causing her to cry.
Lauren had an imaginary mind that seeks the attention to be loved. She even thought of steeling a baby, to become a baby.
” I didn’t want the baby, but to be the baby” (85).I think Lauren wanting to become a baby is from wanting to be loved. Babies are young, fragile and get attention from any and everyone. Babies also need people to depend on in order to live and survive. Lauren wanted to be the baby, to get all the attention and love, she wanted and missed from her mother and father. Lauren father was absent for most of the story and her mother was there but was to overwhelming with emotions causing friction between Lauren and her mother.
This section had several incidents, demonstrating the relationship between Laura and her mother. Laura feels as if to get satisfaction against her mother.Yet, without thinking of the consequences of her mothers feelings or reactions. Laura’s mother felt hurt and betrayed. I think from Laura’s young age she doesn’t realize that her mother’s actions are only overreacted from her loving her child, especially one in need of help. Laura also gives thanks in her recent years. A mothers love can only be viewed as loving if only appreciated by the child receiving the love. There are several sayings stating love will make you do crazy things.
Laura lack of feeling love made her illusion lifestyles that were only imagined by Laura.An example is when the officer made attention to Laura. Her lack of everyday relationship with her father, and her sickness created this image of a life outside of her parents household. I think if Laura had some friends besides her mother and doctors she would not have to crave for attention, while thinking of dramatic scenes of jumping into a six foot grave.
This part had me upset when after reading this section and going to the last page and finding out she made that whole scene up. I was like whoa, I guess this title of this book really explains Laura’s mind of thinking. But also the mother lies as well, so maybe her old habits of lying passed onto Laura. Laura and her mother’s relationship is very connected with all the confusion of emotions between the two. Its interesting learning about each other’s relationship and Laura.
Laureen is a young girl with epilepsy and had her first seisure at the age of ten. She tends to exaggerate her sickness, and her mother after the first seisure thinks it is the end of her. Laureen blames everything from her being epilepic, wheather it be about her seeing colors, hearing musis, smelling things or being tired. As a female myselfI would be the same way of being dramatic especially not knowing the symptoms of my illness. I thinks girls are more dramatic than boys in general with emotions and etc. Laureen later learns about her epilepsy in a moive she watched in school. I even learned about the damages one can cause to themselves from epilepsy. Some that I found weird was the biting of ones mouth and grinding of their teeth. Considering her condition she had no word when asked by doctors how she felt. I thought that was strange, if I were in Laureen situation I would express deeply how I felt every minute of the day when in pain. I also thought it was normal for people to hear music in their head but not Laureen, the noise bothered her making her crazy “I flamencoed on the floor, feathers came out of my ears, and my body made music, ,ade thunder and sleep, made Mozart, my hands curled into lobster claws.” (24). The epilepsy drove Laureen into seeing and hearing things that were unreasonable. If I were to be diagnosed I would probalbly go crazy myslef
H.H explains his case to the court about him doing his best when the situation of boys, arrives to Lo. “I did my best our Honor, to tackle the problem of boys” (185). He is very persuasive with his words drawing a picture to the jury as if him and Lolita never had sexual relations. Also convincing the jury of ways to treat the young fellows as if they were family. H.H is manipulating creating a scene where it is acceptable for nymphets to have young fellows over for company.
What is not explained to the court is his jealousy towards Lolita with other high school boys. Yet, H.H is so detailed with Lolita’s interactions of holding hands with another boy. H.H is a lustful ,ogre that looks upon Lolita and her friends. H.H finds pleasure with his Lo being surrounded by other nymphets as she is just living a pre-teen girls life. Along with keeping Lolita to be his mistress H.H clearly lies to the readers claiming he is a father figure.
What I am confused about is why is H.H mention one of Lo grading, does he like girls with standards why judge and lust at the same time?
On page (125) H.H confesses to the jury of his perverted imagery of Lolita. “Naked except for one sock and her charm bracelet, spread-eagled on the bed where my philter had felled her so I foreglimpsed her”. He is disgusting, overwhelmed with excitement of being alone in the hotel room where they are both locked in together. He compares it to being his dungeon. H.H is the only creep after lusting over Lolita while she is asleep he goes to the lobby to stare down another nymphet, while she talk to her mother. This who section put me in disgust, he drugged Lolita and could not control himself of his lust for her.
H.H is very confident man that is persuading the jury with his “good looks”. He can have any women his age, yet he fantasizes about ” nymphets”. He is so judgmental of older women and biased. His views of nymphets are unfair way of thinking, he thinks he loves is for Lolita but it is more lust. During the party he had to excuse himself to the bathroom and had interesting thought of Lolita. Because of H.H mental history, he is afraid of watching someone else die,reason why he chases nymphets.
” the vacuum of my soul managed to suck in every detail of her bright beauty and these i checked against the features of my dead bride” ( bottom 39) This quote confused me with the vacuum of my soul, what did he mean? Was it because he was older than the girl therefore he was taking away her youth by the touch of his hand? Also why does he try to justify them meeting as a consequence when he completely states she was a prototype. I feel he is convincing himself of not letting go of the memory of Lolita.
I am the oldest of three girls and I’m very family orientated. I like to cook for my friends and family when I have the time. Currently I work in an Italian restaurant called the ” Pine” in the Bronx. I love animals and am allergic to cats and dust. I look forward to learning something from the reading that we will be coming across this semester. “let’s do it!”. Trying to stay positive is the most important thing to me.
This story is told from a grandmothers point of view, which is first person. Her opinion in many ways is on different views of genders and races and how some are doing better than others and etc. Her main views are on her daughter Natalie and her techniques of raising her daughter Sophie. the grandmother is a very strong women who was respected ( feared) by all because she has no hair on her tongue. Natalie daughter Sophie is mixed with Irish and Chinese. Sophie is the main topic of discussion between Natalie and her mom claiming Sophie is a ” wild child”. The grandmother claims that Sophie does not act Chinese enough, she admits her features are Chinese besides her brown skin ” she looks mostly Chinese. Beautiful black hair, beautiful black eyes. Nose perfect size, not so flat looks like something fell down, not so large looks like some big deal got stuck in wrong face.” (616) The grandmother thinks Sophie display of actions is out of control and thinks a little slap will control her wild side. This is where Natalie disagrees her view on this situation is talking to Sophie is the best way to control her child.