“I said my name was Juliette Epstein, and that I had interviewed this student by the name of Lauren Slater”(171). This is the first time when the narrator openly accepts the fact that she made up a fictional character to fill the void. She tries too hard to accept the fact that “epilepsy” was behind most of her actions. On the next page Lauren says she is two separate people which can be the symbol of her saying that the outside version of her is telling all the lies and delusions while the inside tries hard to escape her inter wall through aruas.
Lauren was only lying to herself the whole time making it seem like she was having external conflicts but in fact the problem was internal. The AA meetings seemed to be the best possible solution to her problems like all the influences in the AA meetings help her overlook that she tried to cover up all of her problems with fake illnesses. Her power created a character whom I thought was real and his name was Dr. Nue, I found it funny when she didn’t like the fact that when didn’t like the other doctors answer she zoned out. “I’m not surprised. I always knew you didn’t really have epilepsy. I always knew these seizures were just a thing you had to grow out of.”(190)So all this time Ann knew that Lauren did not suffer from the illness proves how far she had to go and fix her problems.
“Voices,” I said.”I hear voices. I hear a woman calling me,” and she was calling me, this woman, standing by a brick house in a long forgotten place.” (140)
I found this to be a symbol of her mother calling out through the illness, what I mean by this is that the voice is what is currently happening to Ann. It was triggered by Dr. Neu “stimulating the brain” by him stimulating the brain it moved Lauren smell to taste then finally visualizing what the illness is triggered by. The visual was finally shown after Dr. Nue started stimulating the visual cortex which Lauren wanted to find out who this woman was which brought her sadness.
“If only Freud could witness this, the material id”(141)
This interested me because Frued was a psychologist who studied unconscious, fixations, defense mechanisms and dream symbolism, you might wonder exactly how these ideas fit in together and what influence they really have on contemporary psychologists. So Dr. Nue is suggesting that Lauren problem was of the psychology issues which suggest that her unconscious is giving clues to the root of the problem by Dr. Nue cannot determine it through physical means but only by mental specialist.
“In the far corner i saw another woman, altogether happier looking, a baby snoozing in a car seat by her side.”(150)
When I read this at first I thought it was another fact that it was Ann but the child was a boy so it was no way that child could of been Lauren. So I continued to look for this woman which brought me up to “After the woman left, though, I felt rage inside of me” which brings me to another state of recognizing it as Lauren is getting angry not finding out who this person is. Then she attempts to force a seizure to try and meet this woman again so she can get to the root of the problem. Well that was all of part 3 reading but now the author is introducing these up and coming woman, maybe one of them is the fable person Lauren is seeking.
Lauren starting to show interest to pretend to go through the treatments as a way to make her mother happy. Yeah sometimes the father is mentioned sometimes but it seems like Laura is most focused on getting her mother’s attention for various reasons mainly one uses her illness then Lauren starts admiring the talents her mother displays.“I want to talk about the auras.”(83) It still shows how much Lauren still thinks her illness is a gift. She does still think of it as another world that is opened through the seizures or as she says the “jasmine smell”.
“Soon after menstruation, the seizures worsened, which is sometimes the case with females, hormones egging on the brain, estrogen tweaking the system.” Well it seems as her hormones start to kick in, her condition worsen. I ink when she mentions things like her relationship with her mother will end is because now it would be harder to please her within a worsen state. I feel if Lauren loses the chance of getting better it will contribute to the overall relationship she has with her mother. I believe that is also why she look up to the doctor so much since there is still hope has treatment which can benefit her so it will deepen the bond.
Well I find the narrator’s secret world a place to escape reality in a sense. When I say that I mean she is trying not to get involved within her parents quarrels so the narrator at the time is ten who has epilepsy. “My father was too small, my mother too big”(12) this is where I saw what is ahead. I had interpreted this quote as the mother is asking for too much and the father is just satisfied. At first glance I see the narrator looking up to the mother since she is a out going person and does for the community, and the father is given little description like all he does is work.
Well they seem to be complete opposites in part 1 it could change later on. There is clear signs of external conflict like the fights the mother and father has(14). This as well can be a sign of financial struggling which was mention in the fight but one thing has gotten me. I think the mother influences the narrator to try and overcome her illness by encouraging that you can conquer anything through will. I find this a role model since not only the mother goes through her own problems but still has the chance to teach her daughter how try and improve situations.
The father seems to be absent from her inner life but there is not enough interactions to come up with anything so far. The more I think about the lobster part, the more it seems their fights are more about finances maybe because of medication. But it is clear that there is a distant between her parents, “they were lying on their separate sides of the bed.”(23)
Well I’ll start off at when Humbert was looking crazy for Lolita and then met Rita. (258)Well H.H fell into a depress state then as he travels I found out he did had a interest for Rita a older women. H.H felt for her because of their similar conflicts which seemed she saved him for a little bit until the main scene when his Lolita mailed him. The love for Lolita he had surprised me to the fact he knew she was pregnant but still raced to his car to confront her.
Well after some questing here Humbert finally finds Lolita who was big belly. As he popped the big question Lolita broke down the truth between the events that had happened. The moment when Humbert was rejected as a lover I literally felt for him because he thought it was a two sided love. My reaction to when Lolita brought up this Cue it was too funny to find out Lo was always a curious nymphet but even more that she still loved cue even after he kicked her out after filming adult movies with her. Humbert broke into rage and joy at the same time proves he is still human who can make mistakes.
After quickly analyzing her, Lolita was the splitting image of Charlotte.(275)So much irony in that page yet H.H still loves her dis pike a older image. Humbert then goes through his self actualization when he learned that he will always love Lolita and not do her any harm which most had claimed the readers would expect him to kill Lolita. After saying his final goodbyes then he basically gave Lolita all of the fortune even after all that has happened to live a happy life with dick in Alaska.
Then it became all emotional towards the end with his reflections of all the events leading up to the point his Lolita grew up. So now the big scene for which Humbert tries to make things write again. So H.H finds out the guy who kicked Lolita out of the ranch(note:his name is Clare quilty) then H.H goes hidden action hero on him. The way Humbert wanted Clare to atone for “raping” Lolita had the emotions of a father wanting his daughter to be free of all the evils the world had placed on them. So after all that has happened Humbert went from being a pedophile to a father who wanted his daughter not to live the life of drugs and abuse from a criminal. He will always love Lolita even after death
Well I had read so much Lolita that my response will be like Humbert Humbert saying. So a lot has happened after the whole incident so I find myself surprised that Humbert still set this plan into motion even if he crossed that line. After learning out that his relations with Lolita fell by miles, he even starts to call her names like “exasperating brat” and even a “disgusting little girl” which like 20 pages before he couldn’t get enough of her.(148) Himberts even says he began to understand Charlotte(149) which I turned over since this was in the first pages of part 2 so I can believe he is straight forward telling the story. So this foreshadow events that come up like Humbert regretting have intercourse with Lolita which is the funniest thing since society deemed Humbert a pedophile but he was even sadden after the whole thing because Lolita wasn’t the same to which his vision of his perfect nymphet fell to the pits of imagination land o the shame Humbert will face.
After some pages of understanding the relationship after the incident it seemed that Humbert bribes Lolita so she won’t go off and land Humbert in jail which he then starts to bring Lo self esteem down. Well back then society was more unforgiving so Lolita will be deemed this delinquent child since she crossed the line and knew what she was doing. When I saw Humbert start to say things like I don’t are if I go to jail, I start to believe he knew there was no turning back. Well Humbert goes back to his old ways of being this mastermind and the one he controls is under his control which he starts to terrorizing Lolita evening calling her dumb because of her I.q. that is why he bilieve the plan will work. As the long trip to Murcia starts to unfold, Humbert began to develop jealousy because he owns Lolita and no one else can have her mentality.I wished Humbert realized earlier how he is master plan will go but as the more I read the more I began to see the unsatifaction of their time alone. Like a parts where Humbert is haunted by Charolette ghost, which I will say that the irony Humbert begin to feel just starting to unfold before him.
I will bring up the part where he used alias for Lolita which the first one was “Annabel Haze” which he subconsciously used to demonstrate what he thought of Lolita.Most likely the names he used was like a personification for what he saw in Lolita like different phrases the first being Annabel, the second trying to find out more about Lolita like when he was trying to find out her first name, and the final being what she truling is and not just another Annabel.Then it came to me when everywhere they go; Lolita tries to find help through attempts of getting people attentions sine Humbert has a controlling presence over her.At first Humbert didn’t care about legal business but as time progressed he began not to trust Lolita. A prime example was when he was giving her money only to find out she was saving up maybe for a escape from Humbert’s grasp well I won’t talk about it much since the whole college thing had gotten me confused but I knew what he went there for but the Sid conversations there was just confusing as he talked aboouted it then went to Lolita’s private school.
Humbert at this point just wants complete control over Lolita until he find out legally how they can be together. Also I call Gaston out for “spending time with little boys”I called it.I would edit it if I get a complete understanding of what happened at Beardsley college.
Side note : There are errors here but I cannot change them since the auto correct keep overriding me. Trollface.png
Scene 27(110-112) and scene 29(133-137)
I Picked scene 27 because she played Humbert for money, Scene 29 Lolita was the one pulling the string
The camp advisor called me to tell me that my father was here to pick me up. After I packed up I saw him and said Mr. Haze by accident so I quickly said Mr. Humbert to make up for it. We went in the car to drive around then he started to breakdown and said nothing so I had gotten bored so I nodded for him to be more on the crazy side. Then as I saw a cop I hoped for him to taken Mr. Humbert to jail after he was driving reckless but I was disappointed as he made a U-turn. I wanted to stop for a bit for a washroom, then I wanted ice cream but had no money. I decided to play Hr. Humbert with the open my wallet only to find out I had no money trick. He played into my trap then here is when he started to kiss me a lot then I told the dirty man to stop.
When Mr. Humbert took me to the room he kept on kissing me then when I’d told him it would be incest as mother will bed mad, he kept on looking at me with eyes of passion. Then after I ate I felt sleepy so I laid down to rest, as I woke up I was undressed by this dirty man. I pretended to sleep but I was curious if he was going to do it to me. So as I woke up disappointed I kissed Mr. Humbert gently so he can get what kind of game I’m playing. I started to give clues to what I wanted to do but he seemed not to understand me at al. Then I decided to ask the questions like do you know what kinds of games I’ve played with Charlie. He replied “I did not know what game I played” then I found out he never did it. I looked at him with disgust to find out that this man had never did it so I took pity on him then I started to explain what sex was to him.
Not only Humbert goal achieved his goal by defeating the cold Charlotte but the way he described her body was gruesome. Well Humbert was filled with overjoy with the fact he finally hunted Lolita also Humbert believed fate was undeniable for Charlotte death that had been written down by the sisters of fate unable to free herself from death. Well the most interesting thing I found was Humbert’s oppion on Jean unlike others in his past he went into detail about her maybe because he felted bad because she was going to die by fate as well at the age of 33.(104)
Humbert plan seemed flawless with the walls of lies he starts to tell only to reach his goal to be with Lolita. I was cheering for Humbert all the way as he driven only by his desires. Well Humbert impression of Lolita was funny in a sense because she was different from the picture he imagined.(111)As soon as Humbert knew that he gotten Lolita in his arms he literally breaks down, It was no longer a fairy tale to him anymore. When Lolita started to show her true side I laughed because from the start I knew she was not pure as Humbert perceived. She was Indeed leading poor Humbert on, but Lolita true perception of Humbert was just a dirty man.(115) I’ll give him credit since he still continue to adore this “witty child”.
Humbert Had it all planned out even counter measures to his adventure with his prey. When I read the part when Lo describe her camp days, Well back to my last week blog I said fairy tale point of view as in this part of the story he used a “magic potion”(122) so Lo can be in a eternal slumber(Snow white comparison). Well for a fact Humbert dice not see Lolita for sex since he undressed her naked yet he did nothing. Lolita fake the whole thing because the pill had no effect so in reality Lo was the hunter and Humbert was the prey.Even when she kissed him in the room she was so good it seemed she was coached by another person. Then the whole scene when she was surprised by Humbert’s unawareness of sexual experience. I said Humbert was right all along with the nymphet theory.Well it seem Charlotte is haunting him through the grave so at the table it was the first time Zlolita showed compassion for her mother. After all the the worrying, Humbert comes out and breaks Lolita, now Humbert is the only thing she has.
Lolita as last let Humbert welcome us to his illustration of his perception of Lo. Lee. Ta, well Humbert encounter with Lolita is on a mind blown experience with the perfect fairy tale.(39) Not only he found his perfect mate this timid little nymphet who seemed to have gotten Humbert impressed with her. At last someone who can uptake Humbert’s ambitions of a fairy tale kingdom of nymphehts with the perfect princess whom was only in his dream world.(44) Well this is a one way gate into the perfect delusion of Humbert, not only his life was enlighten but Humbert had a personality adjusted while around his dream nymphet. He lived around a war with Ms. haze and Lo, they would have these battles of word while Humbert being Humbert was trapped in this own delusion dealing with Lolita on a regular bases. Some of you guys would say he is just a pedophile taking advantage of a little girl’s pure heart but indeed this is not Humbert’s point of view. He is endowed in Lolita figure and have dreams for telling his story of his little princesses by this unforeseen lake which leads us to foretelling of the story?(54) Humbert wasn’t just timid old Humbert but became a manly man to impress his new love. It gets deeper into passion as the times they spent together, Humbert wants to be with the love of his life but has to overcome the obstacles Ms.haze unknowing is placing on Humbert but as he seem to overtake them his reward was quality time with Lo.Lee.Ta. Well I also see Ms.haze as another type of obstacles for Humbert since it seem he actually have feelings for her but doesn’t really explore outside his personal excitement yet he brings up her beauty every now and then and even thought about marrying her.(70)I’d say this will bring a conflict later on due his mortal perception of his ideology of a perfect partner,I’ll just stick with the Perfect kingdom for now.
This story struck me as a love story at first but later down the line it took a turn in the author’s life. So the narrator had witness a freak accident pertaining his mother and which leads my interpretation of why he hated older woman. Now I will discuss the first major point in this story who was Annabel a girl the narrator loved who was actually his first love. Later down I felt his whole lifestyle surrounded this girl image. So he couldn’t be with her so he refers back to that time as a nightmare summer in which he does not want to revisit that “fateful” day, now I will start the second major point which were nymphet but here is the narrator’s definition of that word “between the age limits of nine and fourteen the reoccur maidens who, to certain bewitched travelers, twice or many times older than they, reveal their true nature which is not human, but nymphic and these chosen creatures I propose to designate as”nymphets”(16). I had to quote him on that part since nymphets is used throughout the story and basically he describe them as a forbidden fruit. As I progress thought the story to which we(our era) seems like he is a pedophile but in his era these things were common among them. He was the type of person who creeps in parks to seek peeks so young girls which reminds him subconsciously of his love Annabel. Later on the narrator finds this girl Monique who was out of his age liking, he had dates but I found his transition after her surprising, which he calls her a “young whore”(23)because she would go around trapping older men to get money/expenses paid for. After realizing what she is he calls himself a pervert with starting to look up to a fictional character “Humbert”who lusts after young girls.The narrator had gotten married which later on reveals she leaves him without saying a word after that he seemed his mentally went back to the days of enjoying nymphets. I found it ironic on page 34 that they deemed him a homosexual.