Hi Class…remember to bring a complete draft (essay and annotated bibliography) of Essay 3 to class on Wednesday, May 14th for a peer review
And remember that the final draft of Essay 3 is due on Wednesday, May 21.
1. Buy a friend a cup of coffee and have them read over your essay and make comments.
2. Pay a friend/colleague a nickle for every mistake or problem that they find.
3. Read your essay out loud. Enunciate each word. If something is wrong, your ear usually picks it up.
4. Read “backwards.” This is a technique used by professional editors: starting at the end of your essay, read each sentence in reverse order (don’t read the words in reverse order).
5. Revise each topic sentence to reveal exactly what the paragraph is trying to claim/assert.
6. Replace all weak verbs; change passive verbs to active verbs.
7. Make sure that your topic sentences are aligned with your thesis. Do they help support your overall thesis? They should.
8. Make sure that your thesis, topic sentences, and your conclusion speak to each other–that they are linked. Revise as needed.
For May 21: in a folder please make sure to put the following:
-Peer Reviews (2)
-Photocopy or print-out of each direct quotation source (minimum 5)
-Final Draft: Essay on top of the Annotated Bibliography (stapled and with page numbers)
This student essay was written for my ENG 1101 class in 2012. Note that this sample essay is good, quite good, but it is not perfect. I think that it may be instructive to study this essay in order to understand what a sincere and significant effort can produce. Please note my margin notes; I’ve put them on the essay to help you see where this writer faltered–where you can make improvements that this writer missed.
Here is the full student sample of a “B+” Annotated Bibliography.
Note: The interview (primary source) does not need to be completed by Wednesday.
I hope that your Spring Break is going marvelously! For our return on Wednesday, April 23th, please have Journal 5 ready: Read Deak and Egan in our textbook and then write 250 words on which of the two writer’s is harder to understand and why. Typed, double-spaced. Also, please bring your books to class.
Do you have an idea of Essay 3? Email me your ideas. I have already approved several ideas.
This picture was also taken in April 2014 in Balley total fitness on 86 street and 19th avenue in Brooklyn. I took this picture while my friend was using lat pull down machine which we usually do in middle. This is the one of the most hard work out machine for back. While my friend was able to do up to 250 pound weight on pullback machine but at the same time it was hard to do even 150 pound on lat pull down which take my attention because they both machines work for same muscle, but because they have different direction to do which makes huge difference in weight. This workout can be done by sit down on a pull-down machine with a wide bar attached to the top pulley. It’s very important to make sure that we adjust the knee pad of the machine to fit our height. This pad will prevent your body from being raised by the resistance attached to the bar. If the pads are not adjust right it can cause bad effect on your muscle and effect injury.
This picture was taken in April 2014 in Balley total fitness on 86 street and 19th avenue in Brooklyn. I took this picture when I was in gym with my friend. I took picture while he was working out on pullback machine for back which helps to grow your back muscle. On this machine he was able to do up to 250 pound weight which is a really big number and almost full weight on the machine. In order to do proper workout On this machine you need to make sure the Position of yourself on a row machine with your feet on the pad. Grab the handles with each hand using an overhand grip. Pull back and “row” while keeping the tension on your back muscles and flexing your lats at the contracted position. Return to the start position and repeat. Be sure to keep your head up and your back in a firm and stable position. Because if it’s not don on proper way it can heart your back and cause pain in your back for long time.
On Wednesday, April 2nd, we will first visit the library, and then we will take the Midterm Exam. The exam will focus on summary and citations. In addition, it will have two short answer questions.
Next Wednesday, April 9th: Final Draft of Essay 2 is due. Make sure that all the process work is in a folder: final draft, peer review sheet (filled out), early drafts.
This picture was taken in manhattan on a Saturday afternoon when the “Dark Knight Rises” movie was coming out to theaters it was a beautiful day and very busy city as usual. I was walking down 43 st and 6 ave and that’s when I saw it the poster that just coughs my attention and knew I had to capture this and with the city beneath it wow! just perfect !
I took this photo with my Digital camera last Sunday on March 16, 2014 while walking on Grand Street. It’s around 9:30Am. The studium of the picture is 3 people in front of the fruit stall on the road. A man faced on me and 2 of other people faced on the fruit stall. the man who in the middle of the photo, he pointing the weight and pulling the baby car. The baby looking what is the man doing. And the road behind of the fruit stall .